PREFACE
This is a fictional story, it was inspired by an incident that happened in my family which left us all laughing. It talks about how some women were shocked when they realized that the girl whom they all abused, gossiped and said mean things about was in their midst.
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Although Grandma's funeral is in a few days, no one could still believe that she was no more, it was still very hard for us to come to terms with the fact that we would never see her again, it was a painful reality and we were all still in shock. She had died months ago after a brief illness. Whilst she was sick, we had all gone to visit her and had spent some good time together. It was all fun and she was really happy to see us. Grandma was funny, we all laughed as she told us a funny story about how she had farted unconsciously whilst the nurse was giving her an injection. She was really scared of injections and she would always act like a baby whenever those injection needles got close to her buttocks.
She was still very much alive when we left her and no one would have guessed that she could have died from that little illness. We were really shocked when few days later, we were told she had passed-on.
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Meetings were held and a day was fixed for the burial ceremony. As is expected, everyone including uncles, aunties,cousins, nephews, nieces, relatives will return to honour her the last time. Few days to the date, so many persons were returning, some even accompanied by friends who have come to show support. My cousin Mike wasn't an exception. He returned with a lady. A chubby, short and wide-eyed lady probably in her late 20's. Everyone who saw her attested to how beautiful she is. They praised Mike for his taste in women. This wasn't the first time we were seeing Mike with a woman but this was the first time he brought one to a family occasion, it appears a serious relationship was brewing.
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We all exchanged hugs, kisses and laughter. It was a beautiful and hearty reunion yet it was unfortunate considering the circumstances which led to it - (Granny's demise).
Preparations began in earnest; slaughtering of goats and cows, arranging of seats and canopies at the arena where the service was to hold, the music band began playing and importantly (as is the tradition of my village), cooking commenced. Everyone began running helterskelter to make sure things go well. No one was left out not even the little ones. There were minor tasks which were assigned to them.
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Everyone was busy with something. Everyone except Mike's friend. I still do not know her name. She barely ever did anything to help but we were not bothered because after all, she was our guest. Other than to eat, sleep and watch movies, the only thing she did was to catwalk and flaunt her beauty in the neighborhood. She would wake up early in the morning even before anyone had woken up, have her bath, do her makeover and then resume her gallivanting routine. The day she was asked to cook, it turned out a disaster so no one sought help from her again. It wasn't like we were bent on making sure everyone including our guests who had come to show support partook in the work, it was just that there was so much to do and some more hands would help.
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Two days after the funeral, many persons had left for their various destinations especially the family friends. We were almost done cleaning up after the occasion. A few of us sat down and got talking. Somehow, the discussion stirred to Mike's friend whom by now we know is his girlfriend. My aunties and some relatives complained about her lackadaisical attitude. She was lucky to have been bestowed with beauty.
Immediately cousin Mike walked in, Aunty Ifeoma , a very blunt and loquacious woman asked him with a sneer, "Mike , where is that your girlfriend?, Where did you meet such lazy beauty?". I was watching him intently and I saw his face flush with something like embarrassment, maybe shame.
"Where is she?, Has she gone back?, Why did she not bother to tell us?". This time, it was Aunty Grace who spoke in her characteristic calm, soothing voice.
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Mike did not reply. He raised his right hand and pointed a finger at a girl sitted at one corner of the room(amongst us). She was a contrast to the Mike's girlfriend we knew; bulgy eyes, acne all over her face and a bit dark. Really, she wasn't pretty. She had sat with us since the beginning of the discussion. Not saying or objecting anything. No one had thought to ask her anything as we all assumed she was a friend of one of us seated.
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This time, my other cousin John spoke. " Mike, We're asking of that your girlfriend you came with". Mike now visibly angry, thundered, " There she is. That's my girlfriend !!!". I don't know who did but someone whispered " Makeup!". It was really shocking and funny at the same time. It was so unbelievable. So it's been her all the while and she had heard all what we had been saying. It was then it dawned on us that we had never seen her face without makeup before as she rose up early in the morning and beautified herself.
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Versión en español
PREFACIO
Esta es una historia ficticia, está inspirada en un incidente que ocurrió en mi familia y que nos dejó a todos riendo. Habla de cómo algunas mujeres se sorprendieron cuando se dieron cuenta de que la chica de la que todas abusaban, chismorreaban y decían cosas malas estaba entre ellas.
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Aunque el funeral de la abuela es dentro de unos días, nadie podía creer aún que ya no estuviera, todavía nos costaba mucho asumir el hecho de que no la volveríamos a ver, era una realidad dolorosa y todos estábamos aún en shock. Había muerto hacía meses tras una breve enfermedad. Mientras estaba enferma, todos habíamos ido a visitarla y habíamos pasado un buen rato juntos. Todo fue muy divertido y ella se alegró mucho de vernos. La abuela era divertida, todos nos reímos mientras nos contaba una anécdota graciosa sobre cómo se había tirado un pedo inconsciente mientras la enfermera le ponía una inyección. Le daban mucho miedo las inyecciones y siempre se comportaba como un bebé cuando las agujas se acercaban a sus nalgas.
Cuando la dejamos todavía estaba muy viva y nadie hubiera imaginado que podría haber muerto por esa pequeña enfermedad. Nos quedamos muy sorprendidos cuando unos días después nos dijeron que había fallecido.
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Se celebraron reuniones y se fijó un día para la ceremonia de entierro. Como es de esperar, todo el mundo, incluidos tíos, tías, primos, sobrinos, parientes, volverán para honrarla por última vez. A pocos días de la fecha, muchas personas volvían, algunas incluso acompañadas de amigos que han venido a mostrar su apoyo. Mi primo Mike no fue una excepción. Volvió con una señora. Una señora regordeta, bajita y con los ojos muy abiertos, probablemente de unos 20 años. Todos los que la vieron atestiguaron lo hermosa que es. Elogiaron a Mike por su gusto por las mujeres. No era la primera vez que veíamos a Mike con una mujer, pero era la primera vez que traía una a una ocasión familiar, parece que se estaba gestando una relación seria.
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Todos intercambiamos abrazos, besos y risas. Fue una reunión hermosa y cordial, aunque desafortunada si tenemos en cuenta las circunstancias que la provocaron (el fallecimiento de la abuela).
Los preparativos empezaron en serio: el sacrificio de cabras y vacas, la colocación de asientos y toldos en la arena donde se iba a celebrar el servicio, la banda de música empezó a tocar y, lo que es más importante (como es la tradición de mi pueblo), se empezó a cocinar. Todo el mundo empezó a correr a toda prisa para asegurarse de que todo saliera bien. No se dejó a nadie fuera, ni siquiera a los más pequeños. Hubo tareas menores que les fueron asignadas.
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Todo el mundo estaba ocupado con algo. Todos excepto el amigo de Mike. Todavía no sé su nombre. Apenas hacía nada para ayudar, pero no nos molestaba porque, al fin y al cabo, era nuestra invitada. Aparte de comer, dormir y ver películas, lo único que hacía era desfilar y presumir de su belleza en el barrio. Se levantaba temprano por la mañana, incluso antes de que nadie se hubiera despertado, se bañaba, se maquillaba y luego retomaba su rutina de galanteo. El día que le pidieron que cocinara, resultó un desastre, así que nadie volvió a pedirle ayuda. No es que estuviéramos empeñados en que todo el mundo, incluidos los invitados que habían venido a mostrar su apoyo, participaran en el trabajo, es que había mucho que hacer y algunas manos más ayudarían.
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Dos días después del funeral, muchas personas habían partido hacia sus distintos destinos, especialmente los amigos de la familia. Casi habíamos terminado de limpiar después de la ocasión. Algunos de nosotros nos sentamos y nos pusimos a hablar. De alguna manera, la discusión giró en torno a la amiga de Mike, que ahora sabemos que es su novia. Mis tías y algunos familiares se quejaban de su actitud displicente. Tuvo la suerte de que le tocó la belleza.
Inmediatamente entró el primo Mike, la tía Ifeoma , una mujer muy franca y locuaz le preguntó con sorna: "Mike , ¿dónde está tu novia?, ¿dónde conociste a semejante belleza perezosa?". Le observaba atentamente y vi que su cara se sonrojaba con algo parecido a la vergüenza, tal vez la vergüenza.
"¿Dónde está?, ¿Ha vuelto?, ¿Por qué no se ha molestado en decírnoslo?". Esta vez fue la tía Grace la que habló con su característica voz calmada y tranquilizadora.
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Mike no respondió. Levantó la mano derecha y señaló con un dedo a una chica sentada en una esquina de la sala (entre nosotros). Era un contraste con la novia de Mike que conocíamos; ojos saltones, acné por toda la cara y un poco oscura. Realmente, no era guapa. Se había sentado con nosotros desde el principio de la discusión. Sin decir ni objetar nada. A nadie se le había ocurrido preguntarle nada ya que todos suponíamos que era amiga de alguno de los que estábamos sentados.
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Esta vez, mi otro primo John habló. "Mike, estamos preguntando por tu novia con la que has venido". Mike ahora visiblemente enfadado, tronó, " Ahí está. Esa es mi novia!!!". No sé quién lo hizo pero alguien susurró "¡Maquillaje!". Fue realmente impactante y divertido al mismo tiempo. Fue tan increíble. Así que ha sido ella todo el tiempo y había escuchado todo lo que habíamos estado diciendo. Fue entonces cuando caímos en la cuenta de que nunca habíamos visto su cara sin maquillaje, ya que se levantaba temprano por la mañana y se embellecía.
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I hope you enjoyed the story. I want to also thank this community writingclub (@hive-132410)
This story is an original story written by @luckydrums.
I also want to appreciate my role models @whispermystery and @franchalad. They are great writers and their works inspire me alot.
All images used are well sourced and are from free image sites
Hahaha, make ups.... Don't even go there 😂😂😂
😄😄😄 Yea makeovers are really beautiful but can be deceitful sometimes. Thanks for stopping by. I really appreciate it
hahahaha!, This is really funny, I can imagine the looks on their faces when they realize Mike's girlfriend has been there the whole time.
Indeed makeups can transform an individual,
it can really be deceptive sometimes.
I really liked the story, I like how you infused humour in different places, it made me laugh 😄😄😄. Thanks for sharing
Wow!, Thank you so much. It's nice to know that you enjoyed it
A lot of women have lost their self confidence to makeovers. They no longer see themselves as beautiful without makeup, so they try to keep up with the trend.
When it comes to gossip, I'm not so bold because i usually just assume that the person being talked about can just walk in on us or eavesdrop.
That's a lovely story
omg 😂. This is really interesting, I smiled as I read it . I can relate to this. It's indeed a very awkward moment.
But I commend Mike's girlfriend for comporting herself while she heard them talk about her.
I really like the part where granny told them about how she farted while they were giving her injection. It was really funny.
It's always nice reading your stories @luckydrums. Thank you
Hahahaha. Make
up power! Make up! Makeup power! This is so hilarious. That is makeup for you. Makeup is magic. It makes people unrecognizable. Even someone you’ve known all your life can become a total stranger to you with just a touch of this and that.
They must’ve been shocked when they realized Mike’s girlfriend was in their midst the whole time.
Hehehe.
Thanks for sharing.
Thank you so much, I'm glad you enjoyed the story