Flowers are beautiful and it gladdens my heart that you could find some peace around them. Each line of your post speaks sincerity of your heart brother, I wish you well in your moment of grief, I hope mum gets stronger. Life will surely be normal someday to you and your moments of challenges will be no more. It really touched me when you said that it is somehow difficult for you to experience or enjoy that pleasant feeling music normally gives to you.. Be strong brother🙏🙏💜