Yep, you summer it very well! The "grown ups" sometimes make things more difficult that in reality they look. The personal background and expectations, as well the different background experiences and learning process, might upscale the level of grinding to maintain things running smoothly.
But just like you wrote Smallsteps and her brand new friend understood each other quite well :)
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I didn't have many friends when I was young, so I didn't meet many parents either. The few I did meet, were pretty decent people and welcoming, but I think there was a selection bias in that! :D
You might say that your parent's did a great job... and for what I read, you are continuing with their "stile" in making a selection on decent and welcoming persons to Smallsteps world ;)