In the course of engagement with people, I have learned an important lesson: it is not always wise to depend completely on other people for help or assistance. While humans are social beings and we need one another to survive, total dependence often comes with hidden costs. Some people enjoy being in control of others. They give instructions, dictate decisions, and insist on having their way, even when they are not sure whether the outcome will be positive or not. In such situations, you may end up suffering for choices that were never truly yours.
It is better to learn how to stand on your own. This does not mean rejecting advice or refusing support, but it means knowing the difference between advice and orders. Advice should guide you, not control you. Even when someone suggests a path for you to follow, it is wise to pause and think deeply before acting. Ask yourself whether it aligns with your values, goals, and reality. Thinking outside the box and trusting your judgment can save you from many regrets. Also, learn to speak less and observe more. Not every thought needs to be spoken, and not every situation requires your voice. Sometimes silence is wisdom.
One thing I am certain about is that many people relate to others based on personal gain. Humans often use others to fulfil their own desires and objectives, sometimes by appealing to emotions, loyalty, or a sense of duty. There is a popular saying that nothing is truly free, even in a free land. This statement is closer to the truth than many would admit. When someone offers help you did not ask for or do not really need, it is wise to ask yourself why. Most times, people expect something in return, whether money, influence, loyalty, or future favours.
This does not mean all humans are evil, but it would be dishonest to deny that the human mind is capable of great harm. Envy, jealousy, and insecurity can turn a friend into an enemy overnight, especially when you begin to succeed more than they do. Instead of celebrating your growth, some people will secretly wish for your downfall. They would rather pull you down than rise with you. This is why betrayal often comes from those closest to us, not from strangers.
Ironically, an open enemy is sometimes more predictable than a so-called friend. An enemy already shows their dislike, so you know where you stand. A false friend hides resentment behind smiles. Such people are quick to remind you of past help when they feel threatened by your progress or when they need something from you. They begin to count favours and measure loyalty.
While no one truly succeeds alone, it is important to be intentional about the help you accept. When seeking support, it is wiser to work with people who clearly benefit from the outcome, rather than those who feel entitled to control you later. Make intentions clear. Let everyone know what they gain and what you gain. Transparency reduces resentment and regret.
In the end, self-awareness, caution, and independence remain powerful tools for survival in a complicated world.
Sending great vibes and Ecency votes your way.