I had a really hard time this summer when my wife and I were spending a lot of time on vacation with my oldest niece who is by age an adult now. We were butting heads quite a bit because she thinks she knows everything after a few years of being on her own. It was breaking my heart. I know she is just finding her way in the world and she honestly has a better head on her shoulders that a lot of kids people her age, but it's still just an interesting dynamic that I never expected I would have to watch unfold in front of me.
There is a relativity in it these days, but is that the way it should be? We tend to compare ourselves (and others) when it suits us to the average, but if the average sucks?
I get what you mean about how heartbreaking it can be though, as we want the best for those we love, even when they don't want it for themselves.
I honestly think she is going to find her way just fine. She was raised well with parents who were involved, it's just going to be some growing pains between now and then! Just when the physical growing is done the mental and emotional growing starts!