A woman's journey... [Are we losing time, or is the past affecting us?]

in Ladies of Hive6 days ago (edited)

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I feel old... I'm sorry, but I fell into the attractive dilemma of the 30's. However, I have taken it with humour. Out of the blue, I woke up one morning and felt like 10 years had passed in a snap of my fingers. Since I've had smartphones, coincidentally, from 2014 to date (11 years ago) I've recorded my life in photographs. Not to the level I've employed this 2021 until now but I have noticed the difference between that college girl, lover of Paramore and Alice in Chains, with her Ramones shirt and the mother I am today, office worker who in her free time writes and takes pictures of everything...

Vanity is not the focus of this post. Although, I wouldn't disagree with losing some of the wrinkles I've gained since that distant 2014, but in retrospect, it's been better than I thought it would be. .... To think that in my 20's, the mere concept of being a mother, gave me such a shocking terror that not even ten years later I was able to relate it properly.... And here I am; both me and my daughter. I could and I will continue to be able to. I have no doubt about that.

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Days gone by, I am always tempted to play at owning a ‘time machine’. I look at my younger photos, and I can't help remembering the moments of that younger Christy, slimmer, without stretch marks or anxiety, haha... Although coming back to reality, I don't know if I would change anything... Maybe party a bit more. I feel like I was very oppressive to myself. I should have worn those dresses that I knew would look hot on me and gone dancing and had a good time.... I guess the journey, the journey leaves its aftermath.

In my 30's, I have matured and learned so much. I dance, I laugh, I have fun, I work and I am so many facets of myself, that I can't quite believe that I am the same girl in the photos you are looking at. I think there was a similar trend on social media in 2024 (last year. I'm still getting used to it) called ‘10 years challenge’. If I remember correctly, it was more vain and superficial than introspective. Although, there is one thing he does want to reveal to women reading this post. Especially, to those who are younger, and therefore, insecure and vulnerable....

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The world and experiences don't end after the 20's. The 30‘s, even the 40’s are also years of experiences and many fabulous things. It doesn't matter if you didn't finish your degree at university in your twenties.... You'll get it right when the time is right. By the same token, if you think you'll be ‘left alone with no one by your side’, don't delude yourself. You won't. Tod seems to be in too much of a hurry in his 20's. And growing up is not like that. Pauses and slower times are appreciated. Less is more and everything is done with a greater appreciation of detail. Today, Friday January 17th, I will have a date with the man I would have loved to meet in my 20's, but who I have now, already. Believe me, life is a journey but it is not a sprint but more like a marathon. Have a nice weekend, my friend.

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All photographs and content used in this post are my own. Therefore, they have been used under my permission and are my property.

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