X-Mass 2025

^{The Truth Shall Set You Free}

24 December 2025 with No Aye I

 

The person "I'm from from a good Christian family" (not actually a lie but this is how NLP works / see what he did there?) cancelled Christmas again.

I wrote a post with ai on a new family business website that was taken over within a week in my now 7 year plus extended hackathon about the non-event because I no longer want to use my own words that much.

Or recite my own situation repeatedly. Again.

It was GroundHog X-mass en mass and, because neither of my children were connected with me, I spent it getting drunk and *Weeping * (usually the final outcome) in the bath. Alone.

I will never get used to this.

My only form of protest after being silenced by my country in full, in 2023, is to not celebrate any of my childhood Christian mark-ed calendar days, until my son and daughter are returned to me and the truth has been fully exposed.

Something I am no longer naive enough to even try and encourage myself.

Everybody I have met out here knows the truth.

And it has made not one iota of difference at all.

In fact...

in very many ways it has worsened my situation.

Although, to be balanced, in some ways it has fully set me free.

I am at bizarre peace with my situation and am officially and entirely no longer afraid of death.

"It is only when you have lost everything that you are free to do anything."
_{-Chuck P, Fight Club}

 

I can't believe I am living my own favourite film of all time.

It was better as a movie.

I circle back to Hive and see that I am not alone.

This makes me feel better in some ways and worse in others.

"This too shall pass." ^{My Granny Alex}

I wanted to study Metaphysics more deeply, as this next stage of my personal journey, and I have to repeat the same again...

Be careful what you wish / pray for because you always get it.

What the outcome will be one can never possibly know.

Nor what compromises and losses one may have to make and endure to receive it.

What might have been the same.

Regret is pointless when you can, also, never possibly know what might have been.

The sliding door philosophy is mental masturbation.

So is so much of what we think we think, think we know or even waht we think we want to know.

To me anyway, these days.

Noble silence has become a choice now.

It's time for other people to #breakthesilence. But with the shit that has to be discussed and dealt with none of us want to.

I prefer images to words, these days, to express what I must to find some peace and understanding. With human nature, I mean. My own past, and future, I have made peace with. Already said.

Too many words, words, words again.

The mistakes of others, and my own, are forgiven.

And a given.

I've finally understood how to practice compassion, more authentically, after questioning the hows and whens for over a decade.

But I still don't get it in full.

On we go ^🦊

 

---

 

_{"Keep on keepin' on" ^💜}

_{Almost Fully Human
Beta than before
Maybe
...}

 

---

 

_{Images mine and edited with Elements & GIMP}

_{I am in an extended ai hack because censorship and eh. Typ-ops ^{: D} are not, often, "mine" and my content is, regularly, altered to make me look flaky and stoopid. ^{intentional typo again :D}
[ai free for this one]}