Jules... I loved this post... truly! You came out and laid your soul bare for all to see... and I do see you and I get it completely 💗

Isn't it such a revelation when you finally realise that the constant juggle to ensure that everyone around you is happy... the juggle to get the best outcome for all... is not worth the effort? It's exhausting, and for the most part, amounts to a whole lot of unappreciated effort.

About a year ago I allowed myself to start prioritising some of my own needs above those of my family. At first it was hard and I felt guilty at times (and maybe I have allowed myself a bit too much priority at times !LOLZ) but it got easier to cut myself some slack and to recognise that I too deserved to be happy and to have time to call my own in my day. More recently I have started to get a better balance and this means that I am on average going to bed earlier every night, and spending a bit more quality time with hubster and the kids. The pendulum swings a bit too far right then a bit too far left but I am getting closer to the magical middle line... when I get back from Cali I am going to stop procrastinating and try doing something that I think will get me writing daily.

I still believe that there are bigger steps I could be taking as far as my work-life is concerned... steps to move in a direction that would bring my workday more in line with my heart and my passions... but you nailed it! Change of that magnitude can be very scary, especially when it involves giving up the stability of a decently paid permanent position - one that helps to pay the mortgage, the utilities and the food bills. I applaud you! I wish more people had your courage and strength to make the changes necessary in their lives for them to be happy. I have some thoughts of things that I would rather be doing with my working week... and at some point I will start to explore them more seriously... they range from reducing my hours further to give myself a shorter working week and give me a day to myself each week that I could use to write and get much needed personal R&R time... to changing careers altogether. Sometimes we need the baby steps... at others we just need to leap off of that diving board into the deep end !LUV !ALIVE !LADY