It is statements like this one:
Tigrilla, what I like or want is irrelevant. I'll do whatever I can to support people in learning, but only if they're openly inquiring.
Right after statements like this:
Hmmm. Isn't this self-defeating? I asked you to examine your intentions and your actions.
Perhaps you're projecting this notion of resistance? Aren't you resisting my stated purposes?
that lead me to the state I feel right now.
Obviously, I don't know what "openly inquiring" means to you. Asking for help is met with responses like "self-defeating", "you don't want to deal with it", and "that (clearly!) wasn't as important as what you've been doing".
The more I ask for help and direction, the more I hear that I am doing it wrong.
I misspoke; I apologize. I regret my mistake.
I wrote that your emotions are irrelevant to others.
That's not what I meant. I failed at editing properly.
That was incorrect (obviously). I care about what you feel.
I meant that they're most important to you, and that I don't know what your feelings are until you tell me. Unless I can predict what you'll feel, I can't deal with them before I hear about them.
I can't always predict what people will feel. Is that my fault? Is it a failing?
I understand that my feelings are less important to me than to others; I do my best to make my feelings irrelevant because they sometimes interfere with clear thinking and effective action. Of course I still have them...
I'm not perfect. Please forgive my error.
[shame]
btw
imo
If someone relies on intuition in order to decide what to think then it will be impossible for that person to do philosophy. Philosophy is anti-intuitive; it requires complete trust in reason and a willingness to go outside the boundaries of what one understands.
Thanks again for our conversation, Tigrilla.