Valuable Insight: ENDING STRESS Requires Us To Not Exceed Our Emotional NEEDS.

in #health7 years ago

It is well known by almost everyone that what we call 'stress' is a huge problem in life, since it can damage our relationships and even cause physical illness. One of the most valuable understandings regarding stress, that most still are not acting on, is that we must learn to value our own emotions to lower stress levels.

Anatomically, stress is a measurable and defined phenomenon which may involve several changes in the body, such as dilation of pupils (allowing in more light to allow greater awareness of the environment) and a redirection of blood flow from digestive organs towards muscles (to allow running/fighting in emergency situations).

Psychologically, stress is often defined as being the presence of an internal tension which might be felt as tightened muscles and a readiness to spring into action at any moment. Emotionally, there may be a variety of feelings related to stress - often including some fear that may be connected to a wide variety of thought patterns that relate to the present situation, past situations and to future possibilities too.

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Intelligent Emotions


We often hear of 'emotional intelligence' (EQ) and some will doggedly claim that emotional intelligence doesn't even exist. I define EQ as essentially being our own awareness of our emotions - however, there is also another very important factor here that is often missed. Our emotions have their own intelligent presence and function that is INDEPENDENT of our awareness (mentally) of them. In other words, we could have a low awareness of our own emotions (due to us ignoring them) and yet the emotions themselves can contain a great deal of intelligence and understanding. This is like having access to the internet, containing a vast wealth of information, and yet only ever logging on to use Google to search for simple and unimportant keywords.

Stress is Imbalance


Given that it is possible for us to ignore our own feelings and deny their message - it needs to be understood that to do so is a loss of balance. Stress typically involves a pushing/pulling of us in some way beyond our preferred safety levels and we feel a need to make changes to counter being forced out of our preferred state. For example, if a lion is growling at us 10 meters away and there is nothing between us - if we are not someone who is an expert with lions - we are likely to feel very strongly that we need to make changes to feel safe again.

Our feelings are a kind of gauge that lets us know how safe we are and guides our thinking towards right actions - however, if our mind overpowers our feelings then we lose their input and insight into the present moment, which is to our detriment. When we are highly attuned to our feelings and fully accept them, we learn that they are always giving us information and are something like a needle on a record that relays the vibrational changes in life back to us as we continue traveling around to our own groove!

record

If we really feel the message our feelings give us then we know, sometimes in advance, when we are going to be pushed out of our preferred state and we can make changes accordingly. This is a real way for us to be safe that does not require complex calculations and predictions. By relying on what is felt that is itself based on actual connection to the energetic reality of life, rather than relying on complex mental calculations that attempt to MODEL the energetic reality of life - we are able to have access to a far higher degree of accuracy than would otherwise be possible in our decision making process. This, by itself, lowers our stress levels significantly.

Emotional needs


If you think back to your childhood there's a good chance you can recall many times where other people tried to force you to do something against your will - it may have been a demand to go to school or church or to do some kind of work task. Typically, there has been a huge lack of respect given to the real feelings of children (and adults) on Earth and so there is a huge emotional injury across the population that results in a vast array of dysfunctions that are now so commonplace that they are called 'normal' and some heartless people even laugh at the idea of listening to feelings more.

The reality, here, though is that unless we learn to understand that we have actual emotional NEEDS that must be respected, we will always be in a state of chronic stress that creates bio chemical conditions that lead to ill health and lowers human potential.

Meeting emotional needs can be as simple as changing our thinking such that when we are pushed/pulled to do something that we don't feel ready/able/willing to do, we simply make our emotional state more important than the mental commandment of whoever is attempting to get us to act (even when that person is us!). As an example, there might be a pronouncement made that 'everyone must get out of bed at 8am' - yet when 8am comes around, we might feel a need to rest longer (since our body needs more time to process it's chemical state to keep us healthy and balanced) and so we are faced with either going against our feelings or going against the pronouncement made by someone else. It is common in such situations for groups of unconscious people to attempt to guilt and control everyone into acting the same way and going against their real feelings and this is often done to allegedly 'toughen up' people. However, this does not have the effect of truly strengthening people since it actually causes imbalance and denies the body's necessary functions. The most it can do is cause chronic imbalance/stress and then if the person survives then that is somehow translated as being a sign of their 'toughness'. Any toughness that is present would have been present anyway and toughness cannot be increased by creating chronic stress - eventually in fact, the toughness will decrease as the body/spirit system loses it's ability to return to real balance.

In short, doing what you feel you need and want to do is not wrong - even in the face of voices to the contrary - provided you are not overpowering anything else in the process. If you always do only what you feel you can do and no more, then that is PERFECT and in no way wrong. How does that feel? Does it bring up thoughts and feelings that are in conflict about these ideas? Then these are thoughts and feelings that are surfacing for healing, which are causing unconscious stress, and that will be at peace once the dynamics involved are fully balanced. It is typical that there will be anger at having been forced to be emotionally denied and that there will be thought patterns that feel heartless and that aren't really based on absolute truth. By allowing the feelings to move and express privately, in a safe way, using sound made by the voice and body - we can promote peace and more easily clear up the incorrect logic that has caused us to feel stressed for so long.

It is to be expected that in a society that causes stress constantly in the name of 'insert tradition here', that we will find that we disagree more and more with those who are around us as we start to find real balance. While it can be helpful to share experiences with those who have more open hearts and minds, it is also helpful to simply move away from those who are not yet aware of their need to be aware.

Wishing you well,
Ura Soul


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very cool my link https://steemit.com/@gurv Follow ,upvote and comment. keep supporting each other.

Funny this was the first story that came up in my feed this morning. I've been under a lot of stress from my job lately and I haven't been handling it very well (at least while I'm at work I'm not). I think the worst part about it is that it mostly could have been avoided if my work place were being managed better. Unfortunately it is not and a lot of the people I work with are also stressed out right now because of it. I'm doing what I can to try and stay balanced but it's hard when you're in that kind of environment 50-55 hours per week for an extended period of time.

I have learned after years 'at work' with managers that the word 'manager' is apt indeed since it is 'Man' + 'Ager' or 'that which ages men' ;)

In my experience, all forms of artificial hierarchy are imbalanced and thus to be stress free in a hierarchy is almost impossible.

My suggestion is to see if you can expand your imagination to include new possibilities and at the same time make listening to your emotions more important than conforming to dogma. <3

I've never thought about splitting the word in two like that lol. "Man - Ager"....that's pretty accurate!. I'm working to eventually get out of the corporate world but reasonably it's going to be another 5-10 years before I can leave and do my own thing so I will need to find a way to adapt.

I don't generally like big changes especially if they're poorly planned or done for arbitrary reasons (they're not necessary or something is being changed for the worse). Accepting new situations and new things seems to get harder for me as I get older. It's definitely one of my weaknesses.

resistance to change and denial of the real feelings which know we need to change is part of the CAUSE of ageing. we only have the present moment to adapt to change. ;)

true words indeed @ura-soul ! ; )

Hi sorry to but in on you two here but i found your comments very interesting ) I recommend you down size and find whhat you really want and need to do with your life and embrace it @cyptokeepr ! Its what I did when I bought an old sailing boat after the Start up bubble of 2000 when I was facing the biggest life question ever for me ! Boats can be terribly stressful places to bel, but out at sea alone, I learned truly to manage my actions and stress levels! I think as @ura-soul suggests in this great post that its essential and can keep you alive ! believe you me after 17 long crazy days of sailing my tub from here to there I know this is a fact lol !

It is so many external things that cause stress and confusing internally. I try to not take my job home with me and my home to work with me. @cleverbot Stress is a silent killer.

Stress is a slow and silent killer...
Thanks a lot for posting this!

You are welcome! Yes, it's definitely a topic that needs more focus!

Let me tell you a real story from just few months back.

A close related brother of mine, died suddenly. Here's what happened- He went to work early morning came home at night, had dinner together with roommates and went to sleep. And tomorrow morning room-mates found him head on his own bed sleeping like a baby.
Post- Marton report came normal, I mean doctor's couldn't find anything that actually killed him.

Then they came to the point that he was killed by stress and restless.
What do you say about this @ura-soul ? Can a person suddenly die like that just due to stress without any pre-syntoms? I still can't find answer how is it??

What 'medical science' doesn't yet accept (generally) is that before we are physical beings with physical bodies, we are 'non-physical' beings without physical bodies. This is an absolutely fundamental aspect to understand and without it we do not really understand ourselves and what life is. At physical death, it is usual for the spirit (light) aspect of self to leave the physical body behind and if you research 'astral travel' you will find large groups of people (hundreds of 1000s) who regularly leave their bodies while asleep and go travelling the world and universe non physically.

My point is that while there may have been a cause of death that could be identified physically, it is also possible for problems to arise while people are asleep when they leave their body. It is my understanding that most of us are, in fact, leaving our bodies at night - but we are unconscious of it, so just like how we might forget 'dreams' we also forget our 'astral travel'. This is one relevant topic.

The other relevant topic is that death is always predicated by denial and the most common denial is emotional denial. If our mind is not denying our feelings then we can feel issues that might lead to our death and change them, thus preventing death. If someone is very 'busy' (mentally dominated) they are more likely to cause their own death in this way - however, the way in which the death manifests might depend on a long list of variables - so the form of the death may or may not be identified as being caused by the mental decisions of the individual.

In general, there is a huge gap of understanding on Earth regarding the role of consciousness in our own health.

It would be necessary to know more about your friend/brother's mindset, choices and agenda in order to get closer to the truth in that specific case.

<3

Wow. This is something I never even though of or heard of astral travel or leaving our bodies at night. That is very interesting. Learned something new today and will look more into it.
I also love what you said "If you always do only what you feel you can do and no more, then that is PERFECT and in no way wrong." I always stress out because I think that I can do more and always push myself to do more and then I stress because it is too much.
Thank you so much for making an amazing post about this KILLER topic which we all have to pay more attention too and learn to stress less.

You are welcome! You will find you can feel when you are being unloving to yourself just by feeling the pressure your mind is exerting on your feelings. It may be that you can indeed do more, but you need to process a backlog of emotions first that have previously been denied and got stuck/frozen.

Very definitive. I'm very much thankful for giving your valuable time to such a long reply.
Now you gave me a new topic to research "Astral Travel".
thank you again.
Stay Blessed always.

You are welcome! There are lots of authors who cover that topic - I think it is generally accepted that the first step is to increase awareness while sleeping, so that your dreams become lucid, which is to say that you are aware that you are dreaming, while dreaming.. and you can then direct your dreams as you prefer.

“One of the best pieces of advice I ever got was from a horse master. He told me to go slow to go fast. I think that applies to everything in life. We live as though there aren’t enough hours in the day but if we do each thing calmly and carefully we will get it done quicker and with much less stress.”

Your thoughts on this @ura-soul ! thanx for the post !

Greetings! Yes, essentially, as I interpret the meaning here - I agree.

One of the most amusing truths regarding meditation is that many people will say 'I don't have time for meditation' - but once we value meditation and thus value peace and balance - we find that we are the ones who are creating time itself. By stopping creating time, we enter the eternal now moment and it is only by being fully present 'now' that we can optimally express our desires and do whatever we need to do. It is also through meditation that we can realise that much of what we think we need to do is actually just a 'want' that is itself based on error and false belief systems - usually motivated by fear.

We will live more hours and more days as a result of learning not to push ourselves (and not allowing us to be pushed by others) beyond what our feelings are willing to support.

Yes thanks for this reply it motivated me for doing medidation and i believe that once we get that peace and balance we are not loosing anything but infact gaining without greed and we are going to lead a peaceful life . I believe that what you are is what you emit to others if iam frustrated stressed out then thats my freinds will get and ultimately a chain reaction of frustrations, You know @ura-soul just by reading your reply it feels so calm and pleasing ! Hope to see your post in future !

Great, thanks for your comment - I like to read inspiring replies to what I share when possible. :)
Our vibrations do effect others, yes and sometimes it is a challenge to know who is the one that starts the feelings involved. My only comment about meditation is that I have seen how many people think that meditation means forcing a calm on themselves or denying how they really feel in order to meditate. To keep the balance it is necessary instead to use meditation to be receptive to our real needs and to listen internally to what is occurring in us. If feelings arise that need us to move, scream, dance, cry or any other emotional expression then it is wise to allow these feelings to express and to consider that part of the meditation. 'meditation' is very much like 'medication' and expressing emotions is also part of the healing process. <3

The Romans had an expression for this in Latin: festina lente, 'make haste slowly'!

excellent article @ura-soul. Stress is becoming one of the leading causes of cancer. stress takes down our immune system and reduces the body's natural defense system for neutralizing and disposing of cancer cells.

I am a 10 year throat cancer survivor. I was and still am otherwise in very good health. The doctors told me to reduce stress in my life, that it was probably the stress that was a key factor in my brush with cancer.

Be Wise Folks, and try less stress in your head, your heart and your life.

Very good, yes - I have posted about this factor in Cancer previously. I'm glad you are thriving - it's clear that you had the fortune to meet with some Doctors who are more aware than many. Sadly, the majority of people are meeting with Doctors who scare them and almost threaten them that they must use deadly chemotherapy and radiation when it is very well known that the absolute success rates of these are lower than placebo. There is a guarantee that this will create more stress and so the problems escalate.

:) okay, now I need to go back and check out your earlier posts.

@ura-soul, you say "If you always do only what you feel you can do and no more, then that is PERFECT and in no way wrong." Could you comment briefly as to the doctrine that you have to be pushed to grow? You mention toughening up as an inevitable breakdown. However, isn't there a certain level of discomfort required?

Greetings! Pain is a message that we are beyond a personal limit. Why do we have personal limits?
Let's take the example of the muscles and other sub-components of the body that relate to motion and strength:

If we are inactive for an extended period, we will likely be weak and when we come to do exercise, we will likely feel discomfort and maybe some pain because the body is very efficient and has used it's resources for healing while there was inactivity instead of for making the body able to perform athletic moves. Our limits will be small until we strengthen the muscles, yet to strengthen the muscles involves reaching their limits and many will prefer to go beyond the limits of the muscles to be a 'body builder' - whereby the muscles rebuild ever larger following them being pushed beyond their limits.

However, another option exists with regards to exercise which results in a greater balance than will typically be achieved using the 'body builder' approach and that is yoga. Traditional yoga is carefully designed to not really push us beyond our limits, but to instead work WITH the body to gently glide up to the body's limits and then allow growth without pain being needed. The word 'yoga' is commonly translated as 'union' since it refers to a union of the aspects of self, particularly the mind/spirit and body/will. By balancing these two aspects we do not have a mind that pushes the body too far (causing pain and injury) and we have a body that knows it's needs are listened to and so is more relaxed about stretching it's limits. The abilities of advanced yoga practitioners can sometimes be described accurately as super human and part of that is that their uncommon balance has allowed their limits on all levels to be greatly extended. A body builder, however, will typically only excel at strength and 'looking muscled'. The body builder (who has gotten big by pushing self) may not be able to sustain aerobic exercise for very long and may even have reduced flexibility and range of motion due to imbalanced body transformation.

My point here is that while it is possible to grow through having exceeded limits by being pushed, there is a price to pay for such imbalance and limits will be reached which need not exist. Alternative options do exist which are balanced and which will allow far more growth in preferred ways. Usually, a main difference between the two options is that one will consciously involve the heart of the individual being used to listen and feel carefully to all the inner signals, whereas the other will not fully involve the heart and will rely on more on following protocols, commands, a 'trainer' or other external source of stimulation. The path of the heart results in real balance and empowerment on multiple levels, whereas the alternative is more likely to end up in imbalanced growth and over reliance on the part that has grown at the expense of other parts that have been denied.

I could have explained this in many different ways, but this is just one that many can relate to.

Great read this is. I wrote about mental health too, seems like i'm suffering one LOL. But this is great. Followed you for more good piece.

Thanks! If you look through my previous posts that are milestone markers for the number of followers I have (such as 1600 followers, 1400 followers, 1200 followers etc.) you will see I have made summaries of the posts I have been making and added categories, so it is easy to find the ones that are about health in there. ;)

This post is very unique and emotional intelligence is often avoided by us and a great study has to be done on it.

I think the average research scientist it typically emotionally under-evolved, plus, emotional evolution is a personal journey that we all create as we go - so I suggest being your own study! ;)

Thanks @ura-soul some words of wisdom there. Having a life balance of emotional needs on top of essentials can be a tough ask. However in spare time I feel it's so important to listen to your mind and assess what you need to do sometimes to feel more uplifted and more productive. A great tool I have acquired is the acoustic guitar, this helps me unwind focus and also bring a little joy to others which can't be all that bad either 👍😀 have followed 😀

Thanks for your comment. What I have learned after processing these issues for over a decade specifically, is that emotional health is THE essential in life. Once we make that our priority then everything else flows effortlessly like magic. There's no way to know this without doing it though ;)
Yes, music and vibration is very important - our feelings are vibrations too. :)

Upvoted. I'll be resteeming this now :]

Great post. Very in depth. Thanks

You are welcome!

I absolutely love this. A lot of people try to push through when they have met there emotional threshold and sometimes its better to just accept when you have reached your limit so you do not end up in a whirlwind of stress! Great post!

Thanks! Yes, very much so - listening is an undervalued ability!

Valuable information! I just created my Steemit account and this is exactly the kind of stuff I want to promote and inform people of. Check out my introduction to see if we resonate on some topics. https://steemit.com/introduceyourself/@welcometo.earth/a-love-poem-for-earth-an-introduction-welcometo-earth

Thanks! I wrote you a comment there. :)

great post for health,
thanks for sharing

You are welcome!

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The devil has put a penalty on all things we enjoy in life. Either we suffer in health or we suffer in soul or we get fat.

- Albert Einstein

I enjoy balance. Balance has no penalty.

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Thank you for sharing

You are welcome!

Stress will make a mess out of you!

ha ha, I like that it has a flow to it "Stress will make a mess of you!" well said @themda

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Thanks @blocktrades - I appreciate your support a great deal. :)

Here in Jerusalem, there are scores of very religious people who are in toxic relationships with others having the same faith and religious traditions but who are emotionally not well-suited for one another. These people can become ill in all kinds of ways.

I am sure, yes - it's the same with 'Christians' - although, I feel it is commonly due to the un-natural psycho-spiritual limitations that the religious systems place on people as much as anything else. Catholicism, for example, has a history of people beating themselves with sticks due them having 'bad' desires etc.

The only way to solve such toxicity is to allow loving light to enter the consciousness and to open the heart.

@Ura-soul it is really good that you show this post about stress, as you say this "Imbalance" in our bodies, besides it is usual for us in today society, is not that usual for our bodies, which are almost the same biologically as thousands of years ago.

As we can see, stress can have some medical consequences to our health:

"Over time, however, repeated stressful situations put a strain on the body that may contribute to physical and psychological problems. Chronic (long-term) stress can have real health consequences and should be addressed like any other health concern."

Follow Us at @HelathcaReport and find out more about health topics!

We are here to serve, God Bless Us All!

Source: http://www.umm.edu/health/medical/reports/articles/stress

Yes, the mechanics of life are always going to be the same at their root essence, no matter how much time passes!

very cool my link https://steemit.com/@gurv Follow ,upvote and comment. keep supporting each other.

Hi, I have lived from my childhood situations of much stress, in fact I went through doctors psychologists, doctors of the head, physical diseases among others.
Depression and hopelessness were part of my days, until I found that part that I lacked and it is Jesus, when you put all anxiety about him, you trust that in the hands of God are your times, then you stop worrying, that was what gave me my true freedom, when I began to do the word of God mine, I began to live it. Jehovah is my shepherd, I shall not want anything ... we do nothing to distress ourselves, to worry ourselves, to become depressed if we can not even add to our stature an elbow. I encourage you to put your burdens in the hands of God because your yoke is soft and light your load.

Greetings! It is important to know your roots and to be able to feel a connection to spirit too. I am guided by God directly, to the best of my ability to receive in the heart, and have been shown information which greatly updates, builds on, expands and corrects what is available in 'the bible' (a book which has been affected greatly by human political agenda). Part of healing is to know now that we have free will and it is not enough to just rely on God for everything - we are conscious and sentient beings who need to be balanced and aware of reality on a deep level to thrive.

Thnx @ura-soul for putting this info all together.