I choose rooms to keep clean and pat myself on the back if I ever get a clean sink with ALL the dishes put away. I also aim to vacuum daily which means everything has to be picked up off the floor. My house gets deep clean loving whenever my mom (who lives 8 hours away and has to announce all her visits) is coming over and only because she's one of those who gets sick if their surroundings don't look a certain way.
EVERYBODY does their own laundry. (Even the three year old boy) I help them of course, but when there's a pile of laundry, it doesn't feel like its "mine."
Wow, I'm impressed that you've got your 3 year old doing laundry! Definitely not to that point with my kiddos, but they do help me sort it and load the machines and then sort the dried clothes for folding.