CLEANING OUT THE PIPES… WTF IS A COLEMA

YIKES -- Who Knew..?

YOU AND YOUR BUTT...

Hippocrates was certainly a wise man -- the father of modern medicine, whose wisdom has stood the test of time… But when he said -- "All disease begins in the gut." I think, what he meant to say was --

ALL DISEASE BEGINS IN THE BUTT!!!

No offense to any Hippocrates fans, but talking butt health can be a little tricky -- and a sense of humor sure doesn't hurt. As a matter of fact, when this subject matter was broached with me, I was in my 20's and it was by very large, intimidating, ex-biker (big Harley and all)… Thank God, he was my new yoga teacher!

He too, was not that comfortable, suggesting to a guy from Hells Kitchen.., if he is really serious about getting healthy -- he needs to shove something up his butt. I was new to Los Angeles.., but c'mon -- up my butt, really?! It was pretty common, in LA to go for a "colonic..," But as I learned, colonics are no joke… They shove a tube up your butt hole, the size of a garden hose and some colon hydrotherapists (weird gig) will insert that tube a good 20 -- 60 inches or more!!!

Once again -- Thank God..,my ex-biker turned yoga teacher was into a different, less invasive method, called a colema… Besides the fact that you only insert the tip into your butt about 2-3 inches (it's the size of a normal drinking straw), the water uses a gentle gravity method and is not forced up your ass. You see, while a colonic will definitely do the job.., a lot of people experience a certain amount of discomfort, some even get horrible stomach cramps after the procedure… A colema on the other hand lets the water gently flow into your butt (anus), small intestine and then large intestine.

WHY THE BUTT…

Obviously all disease does not start in the butt (colon)..,but the theory behind such a statement could not be more relevant than today… With our current food supply never more void of vitamins, nutrients and just about anything else our bodies need to thrive and survive… The Standard American Diet (SAD as it is known).., is just that -- sad! If you have subscribed to this kind of diet for any length of time, or maybe your whole life, I can guarantee you have toxic, rotting poop inside your colon -- for how long, that's anyones guess… But if you want to get rid of it.., and avoid all the potentially chronic diseases attributed to or aided by poor colon health --* it's time for a little surfing* (I'll explain in a bit)…

The colon is the place in the body where all the crap (literally) goes to be expelled -- eliminated… If you have been consuming foods like -- non-organic animal fats (mainly red meat) pumped with hormones and antibiotics, highly processed, lacking in complex carbs and hardly a veggie in sight -- your colon is not in prime condition. It is swollen and blocked, making getting rid of all that toxic waste harder to eliminate -- plus, it makes it harder for the body to absorb any nutrients.

When John Wayne (western actor) died he had over 40 pounds of fecal matter in his colon.., and at any given time, the average person has 20 pounds of poop rotting and causing a toxic buildup. Besides how gross this all is.., it is putting unnecessary stress on the rest of your body to eliminate all this potential danger… By removing this putrified poop for the lining of your intestines, you are also removing the risk of these toxins leaking into your bloodstream and causing all kinds of problems.

BATHROOM SURFING...

Deciding to take control of your health, by choosing what you put in it and what comes out of it.., can be tricky, with all the health supplements on the market -- it can be overwhelming… But if you are embarking on a health kick or anything like that -- skipping this step because you are unaware or maybe even embarrassed, will only hinder your efforts. People spend all kinds of money on expensive soaps and scrubs to cleanse the outside of the body.., but cleaning the inside is always overlooked…

Besides changing your diet completely, that is if you are eating a Standard American Diet, should be your first step.., I don't have to tell you that -- but doing a colon cleanse should be your next… There are a few different options when it comes to colon hydrotherapy (I think that's what they call it), but by choosing to go the Colema route, not only are you ridding your body (colon) of all this unwanted, gross, putrified fecal matter.., you are teaching your colon to eliminate these toxins on its own.

A Colema Board can be purchased for around $200.., and might be the best money you've ever spent -- you get the board, surgical tubing and the tips (the thing that goes in your butt) and a 5 gallon bucket. This is easily set up in your bathroom.., and because it involves a board and your bathroom, it is in some circles, known as -- BATHROOM SURFING… It takes about 30-40 minutes for that 5 gallon bucket that you filled with filtered water to gently flow into and out of your colon. I won't lie.., it is an odd feeling lying in the bathroom with a candle lit, some incense -- and a tube up your butt…

But if you can get by that.., it is strangely empowering -- being so proactive feels good, plus physically you can feel it… You have more energy, think clearer, flatter stomach, take the stress off of other organs so they can function optimally, put an end to that bad breath.., and feel lighter. At the same time, you are reducing the risk for future health problems, by creating a healthy environment within the body (butt), so that everything is functioning as it should… Being preventative and proactive when it comes to your health, is probably the most responsible thing you can do… And as the famous comedian, Redd Foxx once said -- "YOU GOTTA WASH YOUR ASS!"


P.S.,
If you are thinking about giving a Colema a shot.., make sure you take some probiotics (good bacteria)… When you flush out all that crap, you are also flushing out the good bacteria that your body needs, so be aware of that and don't forget to take a few probiotics.

REFERENCE:
Colonic Demonstration