Thanks for sharing. I read with a mixture of empathy and intrigue. I had my colon removed and utilized a stoma in my abdomen for about a year and a half. It was three abdominal surgeries so the things you're describing definitely take me down memory lane.
I've been told the former stoma site definitely is a weak spot that could leave me prone to hernias in the future, so it's something I'm always a bit cognizant of. I guess the good thing is I've got a bit less intestine to worry about than most!
That made me giggle a bit. Interesting story there yourself! You have to find a way to smile about this stuff, that is important. I swim all summer long so my shirt comes off exposing my horrid scars. When people ask me what happened... sometimes I tell them I was in a gang fight. Other times, that I was bit by a shark! Ha!
Hope the giggle didn't hurt!
I haven't had the opportunity to lie much about my scars yet, but I've totally worked on brainstorming funny stories.
While I had the stoma, it was basically a bit of pink intestine hanging out of my belly making strange gurgling noises all the time. So I named it Krang. Just pretended he was in control and I was his robot body.
Humor is the key.