Customminer whom makes the final choice , I mean he " requires " owning the team Leadership position so people do not get shafted , but the user Gridcoin ( him too ) or Donn Pike can get pissed at any time and kick anyones ass out and it won't matter if its in the whitelist...

cm has the same saying as everyone else. His opinion is given weight based off of experience and knowledge, just like everyone else. While he does hold the team ownership the point is not that he needs to be the team founder but that someone untrusted isn't. This is to ensure that people aren't kicked off the team willy nilly. Remember that he is the one who can never stop talk talking about removing the team requirement.

You know , we should implement my gray-list system idea that I have been working with the mumble/voice/irc think tank with for 6+ months on and stick with votes and fix the math for weight?

People are not following you around with a notepad. If you want ideas out there you cannot publish them in volatile mediums such as IRC or Mumble. Get them written down somewhere where they can be discussed and ironed out.