I was trying to explain the concept of Twitter to my friend. He finally said I don't follow you
Coffee pot: $50, Coffee: $10, Coffee cup: $4, Coffee filters: $0.99, Peeing after all that coffee: Priceless........................
Elevator Fun - Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce "You're one of THEM!" and move to the far corner of the elevator.
Bumper Sticker - Parents: Be nice to your children, they choose your nursing home...
I don’t believe in spanking my kids. I find that waving the gun around accomplishes the same thing.
I am having an out of money experience.
Funny Bumper Stickers.. Cover Me, I'm Changing Lanes
Girl said : I think the poorest people are the happiest.
Boy replied : Then marry me, we will the happiest couple
Some say the glass is half empty, Some say the glass is half full, I say "Are you gonna drink that?"...
What do call two birds in with love? Tweet hearts.!!!,,,,