Groan!
I'm a groan-ass man.
Let's sing a song!
He licks the salt off the chips and puts them back in the bag!
Freaky man, freaky man. He just don't understand.
He buys all his votes for posts so he can sit back and brag!
Freaky man, freaky man. He just don't understand.
He smacks you on the buttocks, you're it because he yelled, "Tag!"
Freaky man, freaky man. He just don't understand.
He picks his ass at the table, smells his fingers, you gag!
Freaky man, freaky man. He just don't understand.
He sells his service on the corner while he's dressed in the drag!
Freaky man, freaky man. He just don't understand.
He shares a pic of his dick and then he pouts when you flag!
Freaky man, freaky man. He just don't understand.
WTF Am I Doing?
Today is just a regular day.
It's also that one day out of the year where people on Facebook actually talk to me.
I don't understand why they always pick the same day every year.
Mark the Master and his Marionettes
That's why.
So whatever, I received a few notifications; headed on over to Facebook to have a look.
Within seconds I was distracted by a post. Someone shared a video, it looked funny, so I pushed play. It turned out to be a compilation video of young kids singing obnoxiously, being loud, whatever, then the video stopped so I could view an advertisement about condoms, then it went back to the annoying kids.
What kind of sinister marketing strategist would feel the need to remind people about wrapping it up during an episode of kids giving parents a headache? That was my takeaway.
Any Minute Now
They'll all jump out and yell, "Surprise!"
Then I'll jump out and yell, "No you didn't! Who are you people and what you doing in my house!"
Have a nice day.
You received the top comment of the day award! Whatever the fuck that means! It means I'm voting this like a post because you obviously worked your ass off and deserve it. That's hilarious!
Thanks for the laughs from your post :p
Happy regular once-a-year day!!
Thanks! It's so exciting to pretend it's not really happening like this and watching people not notice!
People never notice! Ah the joy!
"My last girlfriend broke up with me because I never wanted to argue."
You are probably joking but I did date this chick who would get super pissed if I didn't argue back at her. I once trolled her by laughing at her anger until she tried to demostic violence me. Luckily, she only weighed 90 pounds so when she tried to shove me, she just pushed herself 2 or 3 steps backward which caused me to laugh again. We broke up shortly after that lol.
Well of course there's some reality behind the joke. It's just some observational humor turned into disgusting word play.
I once went out with a woman with a temper vs my sense of humor. She pulled a fork on me and I said, "What are you going to do? Eat me?" That line nearly got me stabbed.
When I was a kid people tried to tell me to joke my way out of fights. Out on the streets it has worked a few times but in relationships it seems to make things worse lol.
I got a story for that one.
I was standing near the corner of 97 Street and Jasper Ave. in Edmonton around midnight, waiting for a bus.
Two guys off in the distance were yelling at me as they approached. "Hey! Hey you! I beat up white people for a living!"
They got up right next to me and the one guy said again, "Did you hear me! I beat up white people for a living!"
I looked at him and said, "Don't worry man. I'm not white. I'm Ukrainian."
Instant fist bumps. But honestly, I don't think they knew what a Ukrainian is.
Ha! Nice.
I have stabbed someone with a fork. :/
Did it feel good?
LOL!
It happened more than once so I'll venture to say yes. My memory gets a bit fuzzy when I'm rage-y. I've only ever been violent with one person though.
LMAO
Happy birthday, bro!
So...what are you? About 83 today?
Thanks and yeah, something like that!
You have a nice day too, it's a great one, I can tell. To celebrate this suspiciously regular day, I upvote this wonderful information.
It is rather suspicious. One would think I'd plaster something all over the headline and be looking for votes as a gift for some reason today but instead I did this just to see what's what. Thank you for voting my wonderfully regular day informational session.
I have two pear trees in my yard. And now I know why.
I never wish anyone happy birthday on facebook, but they still come to me too. Those happy-go-lucky facebookers. I don't tell people happy birthday on Steemit either, but you've made it easy for me - have a happy regular day. I'm glad you are in the Steemit version of my life.
Thanks! I shall enjoy my happy regular day in peace now knowing I'm not the only one on this planet who thinks the same way as the things you just said.
That is why I put down false information! People be like “happyyyy” and I’m like “fuck off you don’t know me or you would know better.” I know I'm such a nice cat.
Since I don’t know you I have no idea if this really is just a normal day or a test to see who been a stalker over your lifetime here. As such “have a wonderful none descriptive day.” That should be on a fucking t-shirt with a guy taking a dump in someone living room on the back of it!
Why do people need to eat cake on just certain days of the year? I face plant that stuff whenever I feel like it. And life expectancy just reduced by 2 years!
Ps. if it is have a great one. I tend to hide like the plague when it’s that one day of the year. I like to just be left alone to slumber.
Thanks for that rant and saying some of the things I probably would have said if I didn't feel like joking around today and making a non-scene over this whole thing of day.
Mate, have a great regular day and a regular beer, Gin and tonic, scotch and swallow the worm at the bottom too.
Yup I was planning on hitting the bottle at about noon today since, you know, it's just a regular day here in the life of me. I'm a few minutes late getting my regular day plans rolling but yeah, I'm sure it will be great, eventually. Thanks a lot!
I don’t know why, but I always thought you have a beautiful wife and at least six kids. And here you are talking about your girlfriend, or ex?
At the end I bet you said “I’m just messing with you people”.
I'm always messing with everyone.
There's no woman out there crazy enough to put up with my shit these days, and I guess I'm fine with that. I lived the family life, two kids, nice house in the nice neighborhood with the automatic garage door and the lawn I used to mow but she cheated and stole from me beyond the point where things could be fixed so that's that and now I'm just me.
Inside the belly of a beast she sits and sings a song.
Freaky man, freaky man, she just don't understand.
The same time every year those Facebookers come along
Freaky man, freaky man, they just don't understand.
The sound of a groan man, what the hell could be wrong
Freaky man, freaky man, they just don't understand.
Damn they're in my house I guess I slept to long
Freaky man, freaky man, they just don't understand.
Its about that time, and the haters are ranting
Freaky man, freaky man, they just dont understand.
See them all texting, Yet all just pretending.
Freaky man freaky man, they just dont understand.
The men are drinking and the ladies screaming
Freaky man, freaky man, they just dont understand
Ooops! its the D-day and here i am slumbering
Freaky man, freaky man, they just dont understand
Lost in the Article, and found myself resteeming
Freaky steem, freaky steem, i've got no names left to use..
LoL, Lots of love man
Its just regular reply.
Freaky me, freaky me, i've got to run along
@nonameslefttouse
Catchy tune isn't it!
That was slick. Well played!
Why is there a freakishly rectangular burning owl inside the belly of that beast? Regular owls aren't rectangular. What's an unregular owl doing on a regular day?
Happy birthday!
Get this: It's a coyote eating something that had a camera inside of it's carcass.
Thanks! Happy thoughts!
The image caught my attention. The words ‘I have trouble with the ladies’ sucked me in. I am a fan of diagnosing relationship troubles with flawed and flakey reasoning. But then on further skim you seem to be singing? Too confusing. Couldn’t you have at least have made a dlive and sung? Then maybe cried, if there really was some sort of lady-inflicted trauma. Oh, and as I write this, I’m thinking maybe shadow dog is a mataphor...Slow here.
I’ve not digested this post properly, I’m frantically getting ready for work, and tapping this reply furiously because it seems to demand one immediately or my busy brain will forget. Will read properly later and might comment further if inspiration strikes from something else you wrote.
Hope you’re still sane, wearing clothes and doing useful stuff. But it’s okay to be sitting around doing absolutely nothing and listening to sappy love-gone-wrong songs. I’d suggest that your time is better spent doing a music video and to come up with a cool dance move that could go viral...Yes, I’m thinking gangnam style. Consider?
Have a wonderful fun-filled day and take a break from moody writer. Wear some cool unicorn hunting clothes and find some magic! I’m also waiting on a unicorn hunting report. I think it’s a hobby I might pick up if I can find useful information on how to begin. So now I have to pick between unicorn hunting, silversmithing, karate or becoming a witch (hubby said I can only be the good kind 😐).
Wow! Where to begin!
The first part was a joke, the second part was a joke, the third part was a joke, the fourth part was a joke and if there was a fifth part, that's a joke too! LOL!
It's all good. Nobody broke up with me, that was just a lame-ass joke and since I knew a line like that would attract eyes, I used that first.
It's just a regular day though and I think you'll be able to figure out what the means once you read the comments.
Sir, you may be missing my joke?
I probably am.
Happy birthday?! :P
Of all the hints, that was probably the most obvious one LOL!
Thank you! I just wanted to hide it so only the people who get it, get it... get it?
You can't fool me with your regular day title and your #regular-day tag. Happy birthday, man. Many happy returns.
Just a regular day of me dropping hints just to see who's paying attention. I was smart enough to step away from the internet while the buzz kicked in and now I'm here to say, Thanks!
Bollocks!... agh, I mean pears. As hard as it may be to believe, I seem to have used up my recommend 10 votes per day allowance so Sadly, I can't give you one of those. wouldn't have a clue how to wrap it any way.
I'll resteem instead -
Happy regular day dude!
🧀🍟🍕
I too struggle with maintaining my voting power so I don't hold it against you. Thanks for everything!
Happy birthday? Well yester-birth-day...
I want to keep the contestant as a pet
Thanks! The Contestant doesn't make a good house pet. You must always let him out at night so he can fly aimlessly around streetlights for a few hours, then he gets so damn dizzy and disorientated, there's no way he'll know which way home is.
Eh, GPS tracker on a collar fixes that
Hope you had a moderately fantastic regular day.
It has led to a moderate hangover and yet another reminder of how things just ain't like they used to be.
This is genius product placement!
I'm surprised durex haven't used this ploy in one of their adverts - perhaps they have.
Well done for making your way into the top 100 real folk commentators so far this year sir!
Maybe the entire video was just an advertisement disguised as a post. Hmm
I saw that list. It's surprising. I spend a lot of time doing precisely what I'm doing at this very moment, but I thought others were way ahead of me.
I can only imagine the condition of others on the table, when just reading about it almost made me 'put my dinner back' on my keyboard
Its the same feeling the trending page gives me
We've all seen that guy on the bus though... LOL!
I don't know why I wrote that....
Hey...i dont think such a girl would ever exist...
You saying she did not like you not arguing?
Are you sure?
You don't think so? Am I sure? Listen, I don't want to argue about it.
LOL!
Hahah...go on...argue with me...i will give your girl friend a call then...
Tell her someones arguing with me...
I suppose, if I have a moment, I could probably do the whole I don't want to argue argument; but if I say something mean, that's your fault.
ok...you can go ahead and be mean...but i know you will not :)
Yeah, you're right, I got nothing; so, have a nice day!
You too have an awesome day :)
happy july the 25th @nonamesleft, may the kids stop being obnoxious and may you shitpost while hammered. Enjoy!!
I enjoyed but was wise enough to put the blog down while buzzed. Never drink and blog. That's my motto.
That dog is too fast, I can only make out its silhouette.
Usually it's so fast one cannot see it at all.
Happy Birthday!
Actually, having a birthday on Facebook is very gratifying. 40 people might wish you a Happy Birthday and you don't have to see any of them. You feel popular, so popular some people have experimented with more than one a year just to see if their Facebook friends notice.
It's also fun to count the number of ways we receive Birthday greetings... snail mail, e-mail, text messages, Facebook, Twitter, telephone...
Nobody called me today! LOL! That's normal though.
I only ever expect my Mom to call, and then she sings the last part of Happy Birthday. She used to sing the whole thing... but, you know, mid-80's and she's become a slacker! lol
Happy birthday, so... you finnaly old enough to drink?
People make a big deal of birthdays, it's just another day in the year... it isn't even that great, after 24 you just feel older and older and stop wanting to have birthdays...
I've been old enough to drink for nearly two decades LOL!
I love how fucking random this is.
Lol’d multiple times.
nice art with a great article
It's bad that again your girlfriend break up with you..
Hey man just chill and try to patch up again, if both of you love each other or take a cane of 🍺 beers and Wait for next girlfriend..
Posted using Partiko Android
.... that was a joke. This entire post was intended to be humorous..................
Ohh, but the story is looks like real..
But the same thing happen with me few days back to I was little bit touched my heart..
Don't worry keep enjoying.
Posted using Partiko Android
Pay attention to the tags. If it says 'funny', don't take the post seriously.
she told you to grow pear ??? hahaha maybe she had period... :ppp
happy birthday.. i wish you the best :)
That contestant image looks so unique.
I'm getting too old for this shit." Haaha:))
excellent art!
Feel good
for sporting me vote &comment thanks
lol, happy birthday.
My daughter bought me a 3 pound gummy worm for mine... seriously...
And yes it is a gummy worm.
Is that regular day random enough for you?........
If my 'this shit' you mean facebook nonsense, wholeheartedly agree. Funny, I seem to have the same issue with a day where everyone wants to gab at me on it. If I could pick, it would be today--
cuz I finally got the first book of my series on Amazon man, which is why I've been so absentee this week, lots of annoying formatting issues, lol. But it's done, I'm up, and I'll be making a post about it soon.