Maybe You Noticed?
I'm getting better at not trending.
Lately, I've been doing a fine job. I'm sure you've noticed. How can you not notice?
It's clear, I've become a workaholic.
Have you seen the art lately? How can you miss it? It's right there, hiding in plain sight, for all to see... but most ignore.
The best way to have your post remain near the bottom of the trending tab is to simply work hard and then watch how the vast majority of people don't notice. I do this everyday, and I firmly believe you can too. It's not that hard at all. Just sit back in your fancy recliner chair that vibrates and let the magic happen all on it's own.
So There I Was
Or, Was I There?
One minute I'm busy writing a perfectly fine Untrendable Article...
The next minute: Stoned
How did this happen?
What's going on here?
Perfect Timing
Everyone feels better now.
That Cool Wavy Blue Thing saved the day for I was nearly trending. I had a great idea but I forgot the whole thing when the idea prompted me to get out my digital crayons so I could create the Cool Wavy Blue Thing.
That was just a fancy way of saying, I can't remember why I made that blue thing up there.
The last time I taught you folks how to avoid the trending page, I forgot to mention why forgetting the entire point of the post midway through is a good idea. I hope I don't forget again this time.
There's someone at the door.
Hopefully the mushrooms don't kick it in!
Finally.
You're here!
They kicked it in alright.
It's good to see you again and how is your day going? That's nice. Please, come in. Let me take your coat. No, I won't keep it. I have enough coats.
I was just listening to some music. Would like to hear some?
I bet you would.
So Anyway
Where was I?
Ah yes. I was talking about trending stuff and how to avoid the place.
Just start talking about Animal Salad.
Animal Salad is probably the most prevalent method of remaining off of the trending page. Everyone is doing it these days so be sure to look closely and pay attention.
Simply make your own Animal Salad to your heart's delight, then slide it over to the article editor once complete. From there, all one must do is write a few words about things. They don't need to be important. Most won't read them anyway.
Someone once told me I had a potty mouth and then attempted to use me as a urinal, but I can still run fast.
See? It doesn't matter.
So that concludes today's lesson.
I hope you've learned enough because I don't feel like teaching anymore.
The animal salad you've created looks really delicious.
I have found that there is an absolutely inversely proportionate affect going on with posts.
The more effort you put into them...... the less likely they are to get voted up.
A post with absolutely no effort will definitely get lots of money whereas one that I spend 2 or 3 hours on isn't going to get any money at all. I have no idea why it happens. It's just the name of the game I guess.
Thanks. I made it all by myself.
I put a lot of effort into this one. I couldn't make it four new arts today though. Simply ran out of time. Maybe, if I get lucky, people will think those images are just scribbles and end up upvoting what they thought was a lack of effort. That would be neat. This is won't trend though. Trust me, I'm an expert at this.
Amazing, that is why I upvoted it. :)
Blubbering Batman memes, Robin! I'm in the wrong business.... Dammit.... Thanks though!
When one doesn't have talent, one has to rely on relevant snark. I'm not sad or sorry. :) 18 months of trying to blog, and I recently learned I am more successful at memes and vote selling. Understanding the what is selling is part of success.
My only talent is how gracefully I remain off the trending page everyday. It's like dancing.
I'll tell you another thing that works.
You can make your own tag that nobody uses.
turkey sandwich love necks only
If you use those tags you will trend in each one of them.
I'm back!
Good to see you active, out and about.
Thanks for checking up on me. As you can see, I haven't completely lost my mind yet. There are still a few chunks scattered about here and there. I've been meaning to clean that shit up.
Welcome back my friend. I was really waiting for you.
Errrnm...this post though, if it trends, you owe me all the returns of the sbds gotten, if it doesnt, well, maybe better luck for me next time, but i bet it will trend, anyway, reading through your post, i first thought there was something about the art work(untrendables) then i scrolled a bit more and i liked the blue artwork, till i saw the red...then finally the green...i think they bear in them some expression only you understand. Cheers
Unfortunately, I make the rules. I also say what trends and what doesn't around here and this post will not trend. You weren't going to earn any SBD anyway so I'm just preparing you now, in advance, so you won't be disappointed when it comes time to not earn any SBD.
On a more serious note. Thanks for enjoying the art. And yeah, I guess, in a way or two, they do speak my own language. I suck at explaining things, so I draw pictures for people instead.
Steemit is going to need a major overhaul. No valid social platform can be based on how much money you have. Episodes of Black Mirror and a terrifying future lay in that direction.
I hope you realize this post is tagged funny for a reason.
It's a hilarious post and I love it, I'm just commenting on the overarching structure of Steemit. :) It needs to be more democratic so that something like this has more of a chance, rather than having rich guys who are able to give 1,000 times more money and exposure to a post with a single click.
I started out with nothing. I worked my butt off nearly everyday, aside from a few months off. My single click can now give out about $8 on full power. I'd say that's fair. Everyone else has the same opportunity. What they do with it is up to them.
This post isn't trending for many reasons. I could simply buy votes to put myself in a trending slot, like a few others do. ...but then this joke wouldn't be funny. It's a sacrifice I'm willing to make for funny reasons. I also noticed how thousands of minnows didn't vote for this post. They're too busy not voting for each other as well. They don't want rewards and the ability to give out more with a higher powered vote. They seem to want handouts and some strange form of participation awards where everyone is a winner, but that also makes everyone a loser.
You just started on Steemit. Give it a chance. Blaming those big voters doesn't get anyone anywhere. I'm just having fun with this post, and yes I already knew in advance I wouldn't be trending...but I'm seriously not complaining. I'll take what I can get and keep moving. That attitude got me this far. No turning back now.
Thank you for this detailed insight. However, my friend, I may have already perfected your technique. If ever you see one of my posts trending know that I have failed you, FAILED US... all of us.
Listen. Full disclosure. I think I screwed up. If you click the untrendable tag I invented just so I could be a random asshole with too much time on his hands, you'll see where I went wrong, twice. I'll do better next time, or I'll attempt to top myself and then complain about my previous posts being shitty and clogging up my own trending page.
Hahaha. I'll check it out. Keep up the great work and horrible posts XP
I shall do my best at trying my worst.
and I was assuming you are that type of guy who likes golden showers! How disappointing :D
They always said, "Don't eat the yellow snow."
I listened.
High school all over again!
No wonder I'm so good at this...
Hmm, teaching without teaching. I understand this trend-fu. I hope it can save me from the bears
Teaching without teaching? Was that a fancy way of telling me I'm a terrible teacher who does not deserve to be untrendable? It is because I make up words to enforce my point?
Made up words as well. I like this. It reminds me of a Saturday I once spent in Paris
You can actually remember spending a Saturday night in Paris? How?
Scallywag!!! I was going through trending... and Guess who's on it! Yeah! you buddy... You don't seem to practice what you preach ey :D I'm gonna try to not be hot for now... Man never hot!
Yeah, but, I don't count. Everyone knows that.
That's not true... I count on you buddy!
Hey, I can run fast too! I should actually say again, because for awhile there I couldn't run for shit. Wait, what was this post about? Oh yeah potty mouths. Shit, do you know how hard it is to write a comment when you have music blasting in your ears? I didn't know, but now I do. I might have accidentally got stoned too. How could that be accidental you ask? Sorry, a lady never tells.
SCARY FACE IN THE RED!!
That's not a scary face. That's just Miller. He photobombs a lot of my work.
Hahahaaa, dude I seriously just almost ruined the keyboard on my brand freaking new laptop, so lucky that my instinct was to turn my face to the side!
Wow, we are in sync, this is my I am really stoned song! (I can sing all of the lyrics, odd since I only vaguely remember listening to this when I first started shmokin)
Reba put a stopper at the bottom of the tub...
I don't recommend listening past three minutes, your brain might melt, enjoy!
This is a beautiful piece @nonameslefttouse! I love the idea of "untrendable" / and I'm a genuine new fan, but I promise I will help you NOT to trend :)
Cheers! Following you.
Thanks Doc!
Cheers! Have a great start to your week :)
I really like the blue thing.
Animal Salad to you too :D
Happy animal salad!
Two days in a row! Awesome! Now I'm gonna be even better than I already am at not trending.
I think Animal Salad is pretty great. Besides the two large creatures, I seem to detect a multitude of smaller creatures, like a dolphin, crocodile, maybe a giraffe or antelope, and some kind of dancing Bugs Bunny thing. Overall it looks very delicious.
Yes, it's a zoo smorgasbord salad bar of the artistic variety. You're not tripping out. Those are really there. Look at that strange ape head for a nose. It's nose has animals too and if you look ever closer you can see a bull charging. This goes on forever. It's not trending worthy though. Clearly, I tried too hard. I'm really sad actually, but I'm hiding it behind my sarcasm like a real man.
I don't see the charging bull, but I believe you that it's there. I probably just lack enlightenment.
It's best if I just keep it to myself so the image becomes a big Where's Waldo game much like how my post doesn't trend since nobody can see me in my big red get up.
Hell I don't want to get on that damn trending page. Too much work and too much stress. I have enough stress that I now eat animal salads and dream of cool wavy blue things. What else can I do?
I'm not surprised my Cool Wavy Blue Thing and the Animal Salad aren't trending right now. Just putting that out there.
Untrendables are fun lol. I'm looking for a few recipes for Animal salad to eat. Just don't tell vegetarians.
I'm sure it's perfectly socially acceptable to talk about what you eat around vegetarians. People never become irrational when it comes to food for everyone knows we must eat. What am I getting at? I don't know...
Nice slides of the subject. I guess you are in a hurry to watch today’s Super Bowl. And let the green thing take care of everything else. Lesson learned or not?
Yes. Of course I would post during a popular football game. This way, nobody will notice. That's how you don't trend the right way.
I'm following the tried and true method of powering down and not posting.
It's as sure fire a method as I've ever found.
Sounds too easy. What's the catch?
I'm really an innocent looking 5'6" Asian hottie that makes big $$$ by posting pictures of me looking lonely at some posh resort.
I'm surprised that all of these morons can stop jerking off long enough to keep me on the trending page.
That's why I had to create this $0.30/post alter-ego, it balances out my karma.
Whatever floats your boat.
For the great animal salad, Horaaay!!
The Animal Salad will now take a bow.
I will take your advise and do the opposite. Just do nothing, sit in the vibrating chair and let’s see if my post appears on the top of the trending page. So far my hard work wasn’t working at all. My hard work was worth only $0.03. Maybe my post becomes more valuable in 100 years just like Picasso or yours.
Yeah. Wikipedia already told me I'll trend when I'm dead. They're smart, I'll listen.
On the other hand. Do you think Picasso gives a s..t now when he is 6’ under?
lol, right.
I'll ask him the next time I visit.
Most attractive art fashions @nonameslefttouse. I can't believe how this all create? Totally amazing and skillful.
It's digital art. I move my hand which in turn puts colors where I'd like to see them, then, art.
Nice post.I respect you very much because you contribute to steemit.I will do activities like you.I would like to extend the steemit.
I can't wait to see your animal salad.
High value art
Thank you very much for sharing quality.
wow,,this is so amazing post,,i like it sir
No offence, but I think I'm better than you at this. did you see my posts lately?