I am Jon Snow and I know nothing.

Just because I don’t know what is being written between you and me, doesn’t mean that I am uncertain about you.

I don’t know what this is, what it means or what it could even grow into—and for right now, that is just the way that I want it.

This doesn’t mean that I don’t know how I feel —because I do. Nor does it mean that there are still lingering questions that have me keeping space or running from you and what you could possibly mean to my life.

It only means that I no longer want to live in a place where I have ruined the ending by over-defining the present.

I’ve lived so much of my life in worry about what tomorrow could bring, that now I simply refuse to let my mind wander any further than the present moment.

In truth, my most honest answer is that you are someone who I enjoy spending moments with.

While some may see that as a way to protect myself—or to not truly be vulnerable—in that specific instance, there was no other answer I was comfortable saying, and perhaps it’s because what this is is no longer is a concern of mine.

I’ve tried to figure you out more than I can say, and while I was never met with any answers, I still somehow always found a way back.

This isn’t about dodging reality, but instead having faith that whatever this is will become apparent in its own time—regardless of what that is.

The fact is right now I am having fun. I’m enjoying the spontaneity and unplanned moments of happiness and pleasure with you that I find myself being grateful for long after they’ve passed. I actually am relishing in the uncertainty, because somehow that feels better than any defined explanation of what this currently is.

Possibly this will end up being just a fling—a moment in time where we fell together simply because we wanted to. Maybe we will part ways at some point, and we both will no longer have any lingering questions about why we always seem to be drawn towards each other, despite how much we have changed and grown during the course of our history.

Right now, this is happiness. This is pleasure, and this is fun.

Whether it’s right or wrong—or whether it makes sense to others or not— this is where I am at right now. I care about you, but I don’t care what this is. I don’t care because my goal has never been to harness and keep you like a pet.

There is someone else—not because of opportunity, but because of choice. While that may feel different for you right now, I don’t have any need pursue the issue, because whatever you feel or whatever you want will come to be regardless if I ask questions about it or not.

So in short, I really don’t know what this is—except that it’s making me happy

I Don’t Know what this is—But I Like it a Lot