My family and I just returned from a very brief Spring Break trip to the Wisconsin Dells. Although we only stayed for 2 nights, I was determined to "beat the Dells". (It's a little problem I have with trying to make perfect better).

Due to my determination to "win" this trip, we left before dawn on Sunday morning. The resort at which we stayed had a ton of amenities including an indoor waterpark, a high ropes course, go carts and an arcade. There are also several other resorts in the area offering tons of kid friendly activities.

My goal was to pack in approximately 7 days of fun into 2 1/2 days (I told you I have a problem). As a result, every moment counted. I made sure that we pulled into one resort's parking lot at exactly 8:58 AM. This was a mere 94 seconds before one the the indoor attractions was set to open (this one was a magic wand based activity called 'Magic Quest"). This would allow us just enough time to play the game, eat lunch and be first in line at our hotel's registration desk.

Thanks to my expert planning (translation: "mania") it went off without a hitch. I had called the resort earlier in the week to confirm we could start using the resort amenities directly after pre-check in at noon. Since official check-in is not until 4:00 PM, this bought us an extra 4 hours of fun.

Mania 2 (I gave myself another point for playing the wand game early)
Normal behavior 0

The desk assured me that the room would be ready before 4:00 PM and we could enjoy the resort until they texted me with the room number. I smirked as I thought of all of those regular families who didn't bother getting there until 4:00 PM. Don't they know how to "beat" a resort? Suckers! (Oh wait. Maybe they just think vacations are for relaxing. Maybe they are the smart ones).

My family followed my masterfully devised plan and spent two hours having fun at several of the dry activities ("dry" as in no pool water not as in npc booze... I think we were the only sober adults in the joint).

With less than two hours to go before my "guaranteed" check-in time, I felt it was safe for the family to hit one of the locker rooms and change into our swim suits. Because I knew we would be called any minute, we decided to take all of our belongings to a small table at the pool.

I proudly walked by a bank of $10 per day lockers and thought to myself, "$10 lockers!? That is no way to 'beat' a resort!" My familiar smirk returned as I watched parent after parent shove their belongings into the expensive lockers. "Suckers"! (Oh wait. Maybe they just wanted to be able to relax and have the whole family go into the water at once. Nah. I'm smarter than they are).

Once at the table, we began to unload. As we each began to put our loads on the table, the pile seemed to grow at a magical rate. How did we manage to carry all of this stuff in? Did my wife have a magical bag like Hermione Granger? Had my son become a master illusionist? Had my daughter brought every stuffed animal she owns? (Actually that one is true).

As my kids handed me their belongings, I proceeded to create a perfect (and gigantic) replica of Deivl's Towers. Not only did this pile contain all of our coats, shoes, and clothes, it also included things of value such as our cell phones, wallets, keys, birth certificates, social security cards, passports, steemit keys, deed to our house, the only pictures of my great grandmother, an autographed Babe Ruth baseball and one baby zebra.

This was just the clothes portion of our pile.

My wife and I took turns playing with our kids while the other guarded our ridiculous tower of possessions. On at least 22 occasions, a nice person approached us to let us know that there were lockers conveniently located approximately 8 feet away. I thanked these kind people but assured them that we would only need to maintain the tower for a few minutes. Then I called them "suckers" under my breath as they happily strolled back to their areas like they didn't have a care in the world (Because they didn't. They were smart enough to get a locker.)

Stating at 3:00, I checked my phone every 12 seconds for the nonexistent text that would confirm my next victory over the resort. It never came. I figured they did not have my correct number and called. They had the number alright, they were just "running a little behind". An urge to give in and spend the $10 on a locker began to rise inside me. But I fought it off! I stood my ground. Channeling my inner Smaug, I stayed at my table guarding my loot.

This is valuable enough to guard... but not to pay $10 for a locker. That's crazy!

Finally at 5:30, I received the notification that I had won! Our room was finally ready.

The next morning, as we went to breakfast, I approached the empty registration desk. A smiling employee approached and asked if she could help. I wasn't angry (at anyone but myself). I simply said, "Hello I am one of the guests who could not check in on time yesterday due to the delays. I am not angry but it was an inconvenience. I was trying to think of a way that you could make it up to me. How about you allow me to check out 2 hours later tomorrow?"

After a brief chat with the manager, she agreed.

I just scored another two hours at the water park!

I love the smell of chlorine in the morning. It smells like.... VICTORY!

Mania 3
Normal behavior 57 (It was a long 3 days.)

So steemit community, do you think I should have held out for a better perk? Was I a whiny jerk to ask for what I did? How should I have played this?

Did you notice that I didn't ask if I'm an idiot or not? I already know the answer to that one.

Image Credits 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6