Prestige Love (Love Doesn't Exist)

Both of his eyes still looked at the rain from the window of his class. Which is indeed now a turn during the rainy season in action, after the summer passed by itself. I wonder what is on her mind now, whatever is blocking her hearing, Rebeca was surprised when her best friend, Elsa called out to her.
"Rebecaaaa!"
"Hah? Eh yeah? Why?" Rebeca said later after Elsa had called him repeatedly.
"What's wrong with you?" Elsa asked sure.
"No, I'm fine, okay?" It was clear that Rebeca seemed to be hiding something.
"Let's go to the canteen!" invite Elsa to change the subject as if she doesn't care about her best friend.
"No, I'm lazy." Rebeca answered with a deadpan expression.
"Yes, I'll pull it out first. Take care! " continued Elsa who seemed to know what had happened to her best friend and ended the conversation.

Elsa left the classroom which began to be irregular. Naturally, now is the time interval. Children are free to do anything at this hour, as long as they do not violate the regulations in force at one of the Favorite Private Schools in Jakarta.
While Rebeca, continued her activities which had been delayed. His eyes returned to the rain that was still pouring down hard. Seeing the rain that seemed to also see it. Watching every lightning step, hoping the rain to know the direction of his heart also heard the roar of his heart. Watching it with sensitivity, as if the rain understood about what he felt and knew exactly about what happened to him. Rumbling as a characteristic trait, as if he was whispering with his mind. Even though the passing of children who began to scatter blocking the scene that was fun he watched, he did not care. Until finally the bell was aware of it from his reverie. As well as a sign that the interval has ended.

A few minutes later, Ms. Vega, the picket teacher on Tuesday, came to take notes. He said that Yeshi, a mathematics teacher, could not teach today because there was a need in the Education Office. Of course, this is good news for children who are getting tired at the hour when the class is approaching scorching, especially math.

"Caaa, am I sitting here, huh?" the voice of a figure that had been in his mind, now crossed his mind clearly even in the range of his vision, call Ari.
"Oh yeah, just sit." Rebeca's reply was clearly still look shocked and impressed a little salting.
"Eh, Ca, where are my friends you go to?" continued Ari then opened the conversation.
"Hah? Eh who? Fika? Hmm ... I don't know, Ri. " Said Rebeca annoyingly. In fact, Rebeca knew the reason why her seatmate didn't come in today. He was a permit, because he picked up his brother who had just landed at Soekarno-Hatta Airport. His parents are busy with their work, forced Fika to obey the duties of both parents.
"What's wrong, Ca? how come people are nervous like that? Are you sick? Is there another problem? " said Ari who suddenly shocked Rebeca even more so GR.
"Eh, no, Ri. Sorry, I'm not concerned anymore. " Rebeca answered.
"Oh well, if you have any problems telling me, who knows I can help." Ari said by giving a speck of death on his face and this made Rebeca put more hope in Ari.
"Hmm ... Thanks, Ri!" Rebeca answered simply. His mouth seemed locked. Blank! Until he did not know what to say again. His heartbeat is operating faster than usual. Until he was afraid that Ari would hear it.

School hours change. Now it's Ms. Early teaching. But the certificate, Ms. Early unable to teach in the first hour due to handling cases of their students. Besides being an English teacher, Ms. Dini was also assigned as homeroom teacher for 11th grade students. Dini is famous for being good at teaching, but empty hours like this are eagerly awaited by every 12th grader who feels burdened with schoolwork lately. This opportunity they will not be wasted. Ari who was sitting next to him now looks to have joined the other boys. The atmosphere that had indeed been unfriendly now increasingly excited by the delay of Ms. Early.
Rebeca did not waste it, she began to take out her diary which she always carried wherever she went. He did not want anyone to touch let alone read it. For him, it was a sacred book that no one should not know. In fact, he never went home again to take his sacred book, he was afraid if the book was met by his famous brother ignorant in his family.
With smooth, Rebeca began to pour everything in her mind into her favorite book.

02/06/2014
Dear Diary,
I don't know about my feelings this time. I like being able to sit next to him. I'm happy to be able to chat with him, although not as many sentences as I expected. I am happy.
I feel comfortable around him, which I never feel when I sit with other men. She is like an angel who can protect me from all danger.
God, does he have the same feelings for me? Is this just my wish? God, am I wrong for liking someone who might still like my best friend, Elsa?
God, if I knew him before my friend. Maybe there is a chance for me to have it. Maybe he will not be hurt by it, due to his rejection. Maybe he will be happy with me now.
God, let all this be in my mind. Let this feeling only You, me and Wina, my best friend know. And also this book is a witness for my feelings.
I do not want! If only Elsa knew about my feelings. What will I be later? What will my face look like later? Like crab freshly boiled and then ready to be eaten by the audience? So? I do not want! Where do you want to put it?
God, I don't even want to imagine it. I don't want to bear the shame later. I do not want my friend to laugh at me for my feelings to someone who once liked it.
Oh, God, help me ...

"Ca, what are you doing?" said Elsa, who suddenly appeared in a loud voice that automatically surprised Rebeca, who had not finished her conversation.
"Er, elo, Sa. No, it's just for fun. " He said as he put the sacred book into his tiny bag.
"Coming home from school you will join me, after all the sentence has begun to subside." Invite Elsa who believes with the reason that his friend.
"Where?" Rebeca answered curiously.
"Already, you also know." Elsa's short.
"Okay, but don't come home very late, okay?" continued Rebeca.
"Get ready boss!" Elsa teased.

After Elsa returned to her seat, Ms. Early entered the class and apologized for the delay and negligence in giving assignments. Children who have a million minds and deserve a thumbs up for their cohesiveness, conspire to be as if they do not accept the late Ms. That early The various reasons they made made Ms. Early feeling increasingly guilty. And this incident was successful in making the class chaos again. Fortunately, there is one child who ends up at the same time mediating a commotion that is not worth imitating. Finally, Ms. Early return to teach in a way that is not respected by the children. After a few minutes, the bell stopped the activity of students who were working on assignments actively. Continue to tidy up the book and prayer together.

"Ca, so come along right?" Elsa asked sure.
"Yes Okay, where are you going?" Rebeca asked Tanya who started to move from her desk.
"Garden." Elsa answered with a smile.
"School Park? What do you want to do?" Rebeca asked with a clearer expression.
"Yes, the school garden, yeah I want to go to the Bogor park. Far away! Come on! Come on! " Elsa pulled Rebeca's hand. Take it to a place that has been beautifully decorated plus the remaining scent of the distinctive rain that still remains, occasionally the cool dew that permeates the soul is carried away by a gentle breeze, making it fall from its place of stay. Very beautiful! Making a romantic atmosphere for two people who are intoxicated with love. Bringing joy to Adam's grandchildren who set foot on it.

"What exactly is it?" Rebeca asked again.
"Ah elo, Ca! Where have you been? It's busy with your books. " Ledek Elsa again. Indeed, Rebeca is one of the outstanding students at her school, often she spends her time reading books.
"Saaa, I'm serious!" Rebeca answered, this time with a miserable face.
"Actually, we here want to understand Ari's relationship with Andini. And I, as a matchmaker, tried my best to carry out the task well. So that the status of their relationship is clear and there will be no more heart controversies or heart coups but there will be a prosperous conspiracy which includes harmonization without manipulating what has been appreciated. " Jeplak Elsa while grinning and a little overly words that still mimic Vicky's style that was booming last year.
"Ari and Andini?" Rebeca asked for certainty without regard to the chatter of her best friend.

Elsa has not yet, answered Rebeca's question. Ari followed Andini to come with the planned time. Elsa, who had been waiting for their arrival, welcomed with joy. Like a mother who is waiting for her child to sit on the aisle, which will soon become an official married couple.
While Rebeca, her eyes began to glaze over. His chest began to feel tight. The feeling that at first was only limited to liking, became a sense of affection over time without being aware of it. Now, his sadness had turned into pain that he had never expected in his love story. His heart was broken to see everything in front of his eyes. Like a slave who received mistreatment from his employer. Like a slave who can only receive all the treatment of the owner. Surrender, that's all Rebeca can do this time. He did not know what to do. Now what he had in mind was Ari and his regret.
Ari, the person He just told in his sacred book. The person who has always been in his mind, will soon be someone else's. That means there is no chance for him to have it. Rebeca could not contain her sadness. He regretted not telling his friend. Because, for him it is impossible. He is more concerned with prestige. Now He regrets what he did. If everyone knew about her feelings, maybe the story line would be different. Maybe everything won't be like this. At least He will not ask himself who does not know anything about how his loved one feels.
There is no way out, but a dead end that is blocking. Tears that should not have come out of his eyes, now flowing profusely. As if the rain had moved into those beautiful eyes.

The End