<< Chapter 2
I always thought that if you were weak enough to get caught, you deserved all the punishment that would come your way. Well, that was until I got myself caught.
Dadier stripped me down and locked us both inside the tiled torture chamber for another round of water treatment. As far as I could remember, this was a type of torture they subjected me to for every day since I became a prisoner. Having lived high up in the mountains for all of my life, I consider water a rare commodity, but the way the giants used it was just too … diabolical. The cold, tiled floor jolted my body, like a bolt of electricity went up and down my spine.
He stripped down, positioned me beneath the metallic delivery system, and then opened up the device. The strange looking contraption doused me with boiling water — an even rarer commodity for a mountain-top village. It took my body some time to adjust, but eventually the torture device proved no match once again. The temperature of the water varied — some days it would be boiling like lava, while other days the water would be as frigid as a glacier. However, the days Mamie would be responsible for immersing me in water, it was usually lukewarm.
Dadier closed his eyes, as he let the water flow down his hazel-colored skin. I slipped out of sight the first chance I got and immediately tried to unlock the door, to no avail. He grabbed me by my underarms and held me down beneath the raging stream. I screamed and fluttered, acting like I was being scalded by the burning liquid. He laughed as he scrubbed me down. I laughed at him on the inside, knowing that — once again — I have bettered him. As always.
The water treatment torture the giants subjected us to was strange and often times ineffective. Of course, I would never admit that to them. If they wanted to drown me, they could have just submerged me in one of the tiled swimming holes we frequented — unless, they wanted it to be a slow drowning. Is that even possible?
Come to think of it, this might not be a form of torture at all. Could this be how they drain my powers? Was that my purpose? So, that I could provide them with my wind manipulation powers?
Dadier put me down, rubbed his hands, separated his fingers and massaged the top of my head. Oh goddess, here we go again. The first time I was subjected to this — I-I don't even know what to call this — I was so … perplexed? I think that's an apt description. The massage itself wasn't that painful, sometimes it was even relaxing — I don't know if that was their intent. What baffled me was how the giants conjured this, somewhat, sudsy froth that seemed to emanate from my head. It smelled of menthol, and it felt cold whenever it grazed my skin. An icy burn, if ever a thing like that existed.
The steady rhythm of the water on my skin and the kneading slowly lulled me to sleep. It became a chore to even try to try … to open … my eyes … I, uh—
Wait a minute! Could this be how they siphon my powers? This rubbing, these bubbles — could … Could they be the last remnants of my powers and memory being drained from my body? Mierda!
If this postulate has any merits then I couldn't risk any more of my powers falling into the wrongs hands. I opened my mouth and began ingesting the white foam. Blech! The taste was terrible! But, if that was the only way to resist being robbed of my birthright, I knew I had to make that sacrifice.
It wasn't long until Dadier noticed what I was doing. In an attempt to foil my plan, he crouched even further and wiped away the foam from my mouth.
Already lubricated by the water, I wiggled out of Dadier's grip and hurled a flurry of punches at strategic parts of his body. Not caring about form, all that mattered was that the hits landed on his fleshy hide. The giant guarded against my assault and blinded me to impede my offense. I don't know how he did it, but the substance he used burned through my eyelids. Every time I tried to wipe it out from my eyes, the pain only worsened. It was like poison penetrating through my retinas. The pain was excruciating!
I let out a battle cry to signal my unwillingness to surrender, but it didn't aid at all with the continuation of my assault. My mind told me to blindly throw punches but my hands only preoccupied themselves with scratching my eyes, in hopes of relieving them of the lingering sensation. The pain was sharp and only worsened with every swipe of my fingers. It was so painful that it made me want to pluck out my eyelids.
All of a sudden, a splash! A torrential flow cleared away the poison, and the bubbles that permeated from my head. I tried to make out my surroundings but my vision remained foggy.
Dadier proceeded to massage my body, squeezing out the bubbles from inside me. I squinted and gritted my teeth, but I couldn't mount any resistance. I couldn't even remember why I was resisting at all. My memory — it was slowly being taken from me. I didn't understand why my memory was so important to them, I just—
Wait, what? Memory, resistance, bubbles — I know there's a connection there, I just ... I just don't remember what it is.
Dadier's massage was methodical and precise. He targeted weak points on my body that robbed me of my capability to move. If he wanted to, he could've stopped me from breathing, right then and there. At that moment, it felt like my actions weren't mine. I saw my hands move, but I couldn't control what they did. I felt his rock hard arms as my hands grazed them, I felt the water trickling down his skin. There was a strange calm that came in the absence of resistance. It was soothing, and yet unnatural.
The giant rinsed me and patted me down with a fragrant, blue towel, which he then used on his own body. He adorned himself with a fresh pair of armor, opened the door and allowed me to walk out by myself. I was naked and didn't have the propensity to escape, wandering aimlessly in the anteroom of the fortress.
It had wooden floorboards and its windows were draped with colorful curtains that changed periodically. Strange trinkets littered the floor and boxes that smelled like rubber were piled along the walls. The prison where they held me, Teten and Eddie was located upstairs, and was guarded by Dadier and Mamie — although I'm not quite sure if Mamie was, in fact, a prisoner herself. She had a gigantic frame and had some extent of command over Dadier, but her "guarding" felt different from Dadier's. The downstairs was guarded by several other giants and—
"Ledd," Dadier called to me, interrupting my train of thought. “Come here.”
I trod lightly over the wooden floor, passed the enormous doorway and into the prison cell. It was eerily silent, and I still didn't have full control of my movement. I looked over to Dadier, who was waiting for me with clothes in hand, from a slight distance. He crouched down and garbed me with familiar clothing — denim shorts, and a light blue, printed shirt.
I was groggy from our earlier battle and Dadier seemed to take notice of it. He put on his spectacles and rubbed his nose. Impatient of my slow pace, he hoisted me up in his arms and carried me all the way down to the lower floor of the fortress.
The staircase was steep and often times hard to climb, but the giant traversed it with minimal effort. If he struggled, it didn't show. I fidgeted and tried to release myself from his clutches once again, but like quicksand, the more I struggled, the more his vice grip tightened. He placed his lips against mine to calm me down and sap my energy. His sharp beard abraded my skin. The wooden staircase creaked with every step he took.
A chilling wind pushed against us the farther we traveled down. The sounds from downstairs intensified, incessant chattering that were almost undecipherable. It was unnerving, and my head felt light and almost spinning. I hadn't noticed but my stomach had been grumbling. It was time to eat.
<< Chapter 2
Thanks for reading! One 100% upvote could change a differently abled boy and many others' lives, so it would be cool if you could spare one!
People's different relationships with their parents always fascinate me.
It's great isn't it? I find it fascinating when the same parenting technique yields different results, while the same results come from wildly different techniques. Funny how humans are.
These scenes from ordinary life are placed in such an intriguing context. On the one hand, I know from your description of the project that you're sharing moments that you'd seen unfold. On the other hand, I'm rooting for Ledd to escape his captors and return to his people before his magic is sapped.
YES. That's exactly how I wanted to portray it! :) I'm so glad readers are envisioning it that way. That conflicting feeling about wanting him to escape or to remain safely at home. Do you think you would've gotten that without reading the SILVER LININGs though?
I'm so grateful for your continued reading of this, my friend! You don't know how much this means to me :D
I think because of the preface that readers would get it. I don't know about without that or SILVER LINING. I do really enjoy reading both. It's fun to read the story and interesting to read the blog post. So, they work together on different areas of the brain.
Rock on! I'm glad to read it and feel lucky to vicariously walk this path with you.
Awww that's so nice of you to say, my friend :') If I ever publish this story as a book, other readers won't have the luxury of the SILVER LININGs unless they go to the Steemit posts, that's why I want them to get the bigger picture even without the added flavor.
Oh man! You should totally publish it! You could make SILVER LININGs into a companion volume. Sell the together or individually! :P
Many of the SILVER LININGs have links and discuss some Steemit-exclusive stuff, so I don't think it would be that appreciated by people who are not in Steemit. But, it makes me think about publishing a brand new SILVER LINING but I don't want to discard the old one. So many conflicting emotions haha!
Ah! In that case, you could write up an "Author's Note" that talks about the original SILVER LINING and even includes the links. Just food for thought! I hear ya on the conflicting emotions! I've been having that as I do the edits on Terra Damnata, I'm converting it to book format, so many hard decisions when reworking it.
Once again, this is just phenomenal world-building. Your grasp of the idea in your head and your ability to translate it to written words that the rest of us can understand is amazing. You are a fantastic author, and I'm incredibly fortunate to know you and count you as a friend! I shall keep reading.
This was a labor of love for sure, I'm just over the moon for the reception it's been getting. I really didn't expect this much interaction, but I'm so glad for all the support I have received. It's unlike anything I've experienced on here, and it's definitely very encouraging.
Likewise, buddy! I'm glad you came back here when you did. I just know that you're going to bounce back harder than you ever have :D
Hey my brother!
Had a crazy weekend so finally get a chance to catch up on Steemit and luckily the top @jedau's next chapter. Man, you described the entire process without ever mentioning the tools being used for little Ledd. Literally everything told from his innocent point of view. The feelings he goes through, the battle of emotions because of his brief time on this earth. It's stunningly told and an inspiration to myself as a writer. You're awesome, my brother.
I couldn't help but notice in the comments you feeling a little down. My bro, I understand how you feel, but @lukestokes and @michelle.gent are spot on. It's gotta be all about you and the community primarily. For now anyways. I know thats easier said than done but I have felt the same as you many times at the start. Things will improve as you get more well known here. If you give up on Steemit, you may have missed out on a good opportunity to get big time recognition in the future. Please just stick with it for a good while and see where it takes you. You are obviously very talented. So from my point of view, it should only be a matter of time until you gain a good following.
DM me if you want a chat anytime. I can relate to how you feel as many also can. But as they say, a problem shared is a problem halved.
Bless, my brother and awesome work!
Thank you, my brother! I really appreciate the high praise :D This was one of my favorite chapters in this series, and I just tried to go all out on the playfulness. I tried to play off of childhood naiveté, and craft a whole new experience from their point of view. It's just so fun to write this way, and I'm so happy that it translated well for you, brother! Coming from a writer of your caliber, that's just such a huge compliment, you don't know how much it means.
I'm grateful for the sympathies, my friend, this is just one of those down streaks. Even though it's not that evident, I really do try to keep my spirits up. It's just that I fall back on some past bad habits concerning negativity from time to time. It's just hard whenever I get inside my head and think that I've been making a lot of effort that isn't really making much difference. I'll shake it off, but I really appreciate the encouragement. It's very helpful indeed! @lukestokes (who, btw, is my former employer) and @michelle.gent are super awesome and they know the right words to say at the right moments as well!
I might just take you up on your offer and hit you up on chat one of these days. Really though, I just don't want to burden anyone else. I'm just so appreciative of all the support I'm being given. Warms my heart :D
I missed his chapter because the curator I linked to had already voted on it, so when I checked his page the other day I didn't realize it was something new! I just had to run by your page and make sure that didn't happen there too, yikes, I need to pay more attention now!! I really feel terrible about this one though, I don't want him to ever think I don't care, I hugely care, I love this story and him. It makes me sad that he feels sad, and if I contributed to that I am SO sorry.
It's alright, @dreemit :D You've had a lot of activity here, and it would inevitably catch up on you. Really though, I'm just super impressed that you've been able to keep up with everything this whole time! That's why I try to keep my circle small so that I could keep up-to-date with everyone that I follow closely. But, when you think about it, it's not really my choice, since not a lot of people interact on my posts anyway! hahaha So that was a happy coincidence :D
You're right, I have spread myself a bit thin. I do still have what I consider a core circle, and you and ezzy comprise half of it ;) I wouldn't be this frustrated about missing posts by a lot of others, I'll just put it that way! It wouldn't have happened if not for the new curator trail though, that I guarantee.
I feel honored, with regard to the distinction :D But, don't be too hard on yourself, my friend. I've missed a couple of posts as well. What matters is the continued support. That's something not even time can take away.
I am so glad I took a closer look at your account!! I have myself linked up to @anyx curator trail so it already voted on this for me and I didn't even know it was here!! When I looked the other day I didn't look close enough, I just saw the blue from my vote and assumed it was one I read, but I was totally wrong. I jumped over to see if you put up the next chapter today and nearly left again and then thought, wait a minute, that's chapter three!! Okay, ha, that kind of backfired on me, I'm going to have to look more carefully now, I better check out ezzy's too. And I said all of that before reading this, I'm just so upset that I didn't read it immediately.
So damn good!! It's almost torture that I have to wait a week in between, I know that when you put out your final chapter I am going to read in from the beginning straight through.
I could feel that bath, the massage, the way it affected his body, every sensation...you paint with your words, a vivid incredible picture! Love, Love, LOVE this story.
Thank you for the enthusiastic reaction and the continued support, my friend! I was on the fence about making weekly updates, but I decided that I didn't want to run out of ammo. If I published thrice weekly, then I would have nothing else to post for several months! Haha! The decision is really biting me in the ass, but I have to live with the consequences. I wish there was a "READ" flag for posts that we've read so that we won't miss out on anything. I mean, since read counts are already being tracked, might as well, right?
I really tried to go back to my childhood for this one, and I'm glad about the response it's getting :D Whenever I see some kids not wanting to take a bath, I ask myself what reasons could they possibly have? Children really do make a big fuss about a lot of stuff that us adults find mundane, which is an infinite source of entertainment haha!
You did an excellent job of capturing that, I feel almost as if it's a faint memory of my own!
I understand why you're posting as you are, I just extremely look forward to the day I can read it all at once :)
I think the feature that would be most helpful by far is if we could have a favorites at the top where home and new is, I would have a much smaller list than my following list, and be able to see everything posted by those select few each day!
When the story is over, I'll compile it and send you binge-friendly version to read :D It's the least I can do for one of my most avid supporters!
That would be awesome! I will definitely do the same for you, looks like email exchange is in our future ;) With Today Again I will be spending time on re-writing and revising when I'm finished putting it through here. Reborn however, I will likely put through one final edit and then I'm going to self-publish and get it on Amazon. I have another book that's stand alone which i will be experimenting with the self-publishing process using a site called blurb. I plan on posting a step by step and letting everyone know how well it works. If it's a good place then Reborn will most likely go the same track. You are the reason I decided to start posting it here, yesterday I put up an introduction and included the prologue again, today the first chapter went up. I have to say I'm feeling pretty excited about it, and I have to thank you sooo much for giving me the push I needed with your enthusiasm and the great idea you had about the potential of posting both versions. Though likely what I'll do is when I'm finished putting through this version, I'll just put the novella through and then the first couple chapters of the other version since that's mainly the difference. The second book Renewal is finished too, so as long as everything goes well with Reborn, I will put that through here too :) And I am a ways into book three, though the rewriting etc. will take a while.
Oh, that sounds great! Blurb didn't exist when I published my debut novel back in 2014. I did the whole process from the ground up, which was strangely satisfying. From the writing, to the editing, to the marketing. It was such a great learning experience that every author should try at least once. It's on a lot of publishing sites, so I'll be trimming the list for the re-release. Amazon is the only that's safe from the chopping block haha
That's really exciting! Yeah, Amazon definitely gets top priority :)
Excellent! You're a much better writer than I am. My experience is mostly academic, writing about politics and economics and I have trouble deciding how deep to develop my stories, especially in this kind of format. Upvoted & followed!
Oh, man. That's so nice of you to say, but, respectfully, I disagree. I think that you're extremely talented, and your background really strengthens your style :D I came from an academic background as well, writing technical papers and dissertations, but I also dabbled in sports writing, so maybe that's where we deviated. Really though, I don't even identify with being a writer haha I love telling stories, and writing is sort of just a means of narrating them. You've also gained a follower in me! Thanks for leaving a comment. I'm looking forward to supporting more of your work and interacting in the future :D
Your writing style is much smoother. I feel so much more at home in an academic genre...make a point, back it up. When writing stories I feel like I'm fumbling around. Is it long enough, is it too long? I hate writing dialogue. You have a fan as well. When I read your stories, it feels like I've picked up a good book. When I read mine, I think...This sucks! LOL
The amazing @dreemit once reminded me "we are our own greatest critics," so trust me when I say that your writing style comes through splendidly :D I feel the same way about the way I write, the only difference is that I know that it's always too long hahaha!
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Woah! Thanks. First time you guys recognized me for this distinction.
I read your post @jedau, but it's really outside my genre. I can say it's competently written, but beyond that I can't really say. I tried serializing a novel on here and stopped because I couldn't bear the meagre response. Even my longer short stories I now divide into two parts because most people want shorter posts. Your novel might do better on a blogging site, From your comments above I can see your frustration. I hope this helps :)
Thanks for the honesty, man. I've seen long-form prose succeeding here so it's not out of the realm of possibility, but maybe I just don't have enough pull to draw supporters in. No worries. I'll finish up this story here, but I'm looking elsewhere for the long term. The internet is huge, so I'm bound to find some place where my work would be supported. I guess Steemit's just not for me no matter how hard I try :)
Hey @jedau, I enjoyed the excerpt. Well-written and it took me a while to figure out the 'torture'. Well done.
I'm sorry you're not getting enough to help with your nephew's treatment. I would suggest putting the story together and publishing it on Amazon, Smashwords, iTunes etc. I'd also suggest a crowd-funding page too.
Keep posting here, but post your links here too so people who would like to support your efforts can do so in an even more direct manner.
Good Luck <3
Hey, Michelle. Thanks for the comment and the compliment! :D I'm glad (?) that it took you a while to figure out, I really wanted to tread the line between reality and fiction in this story. Actually, I had planned to crowdfund this project two years ago when I was conceptualizing it, but upon weighing all the factors, I opted not too. I had self-published a book in Amazon, Smashwords, etc 3 years ago which didn't perform so well, that's why I didn't want go that route until I figured out what I did wrong.
I chose Steemit because of all the kind gestures that people were throwing around. Plus, it wouldn't really cost anyone anything, just one measly vote for a day. My mistake was believing I was part of that circle of giving haha I had adjusted my expectations from before though, so I really should've seen this coming. Right now, I'm just going to squat here until I find a better place for me in the internet :D
Thanks for taking the time to leave a comment! I truly appreciate it :) The suggestions are noted, and the well wishes are treasured.
OK, I have a little insight to the self-publishing world - I am by no means an expert though so don't take this as a guarantee of success.
Get your book together, edit and proofread it as well as you can then put it up as an e-book on Amazon, Smashwords etc.
Connect with me via Twitter - @ShellGent and I'll retweet whenever I can. I'll also give your book a good shout-out on my other social media sites - again, no promises.
If you get a crowd-funding page sorted, I'll do the same for you on that with regards to shouting out to my own followers and friends.
The most important thing to do is get a few reviews going, so get copies of your book out to people who read the same genre and ask, beg, plead, cajole them for a review. If you ask if you can use their review elsewhere, let me know. I have a few places in mind where posting your reviews can get your name out there a little more.
One other piece of advice: Keep writing and KEEP POSTING on Steemit - both will help enormously.
Good Luck <3
Oh, wow! Thanks! I'm really grateful for the help. I might take you up on your offer, but for my first self-published book. I asked more than 50 people for a review, gave away even more free copies, but I've only received a small amount in return. When you see the number of reviews compared to the number of people I asked to review it, you'll see why I was traumatized from self-publishing lol
I'm currently refining it with a professional editor, but I'll tweet to you when a paperback version is available. I don't use Twitter nowadays anymore though, but my account is still there @jedau Don't mind the recent tweets, those are just auto-generated. Look at my tweets from before though and notice the lack of interaction from people haha!
Great work, Jed. I've been enjoying following along. :)
Thanks for the support, Luke :D It's always awesome to receive a comment! Nice to know there are people reading this. I really put in a lot of effort for this one, and the read numbers don't inspire much confidence. I'm holding out for hope though, and I'm grateful for the people who read and comment on this now.
Too bad this post won't qualify for @curie anymore though.. While I'm thankful for all the automated votes, this'll likely go the way of my previous post :( It's a shame since I'm sending all earnings to Zepp and taking no monetary compensation for this whatsoever. I don't think $2 would even help that much in buying meds or treatment.
What is Zepp?
Seems like you might be falling into some old patterns of expectation here. If you're not posting this novel for yourself, I'd encourage you not to post it. If others' positive feedback and responses is the driving force behind it, you may end up disappointed. Make your art something you value intrinsically.
But yeah... sure is nice to get comments also. :)
I always try not to, believe me. I get a bit discouraged with the lack of feedback, but ultimately I continue because I'm doing this to help my nephew. Zepp (or Zeppelin) is my nephew's name. He's the protagonist and inspiration of the story. Jed + Led = Ledd, because of Led... Zeppelin (get it? lol) All earnings I get here immediately go straight to help with his treatment. You can find more info here and here.
So yeah, the small disappointment I feel are just some things I shake off. I'm keeping the big picture in mind, and at the end of the day, that makes me feel a sense of accomplishment that no amount of votes could give :D Thanks for the reminder though, Luke. I appreciate it.
Ah shoot, I'm sorry Jed! I do remember reading the intro about Zepp and it totally slipped my mind as I was reading this chapter. I was really inspired by that when I read it, but time has passed and it slipped my mind tonight. I actually googled "zepp" and came up with this which was clearly not what you meant. :) I should have paused for a second and thought a bit more.
Haha! It's perfectly alright, Luke :D The slogan of that website you linked to is awesome. I guess that's the downside of posting weekly huh.. I did it so that I have a chance to get the curie vote both for this and Silver Lining, to give them the best chance at earning, but I guess disqualification from being nominated defeats the purpose haha Times like these I really wish I had more reach.
This is great man! Glad I happened to bump into this on the interwebs, really cool!
Thanks, man! I hope you get a chance to read the previous chapters to catch up. Will be reading the latest Will Scott in a bit. I really appreciate you taking the time to leave a comment!
I'm digging this story. I hope he escapes soon. 😉
Thanks, Ken! I really appreciate it :D My eyes welled up a bit as I read your comment. I'm so happy that you're enjoying it. I know it could go on a bit long, so I really appreciate the people who stick with it. Also, I saw that you re-steemed both chapters one and three which is huge! Thank you for that. Chapter three was one of my favorite chapters to write, and I hope that the passion translated effectively.
You really do have a way with words, if you're not already writing a book you should really consider it.
Please don't take the lack of response/payout as a judgement on your writing at all, I think everyone that actually took the time to read it would appreciate your skills :)
I'm off to read the next one now
I really try not to, and I just try to remember that I'm doing this for a good cause, not for some selfish reason. Man, you are clearing these chapters quickly! If it were me, I would take a lot of time to finish reading, but that's more of a slight against me haha!
I have self-published a book before, and I've written a couple other stories as well. This was actually supposed to be a crowdfunded book, that's why the chapters are longer than the usual post, but I decided to put it up in Steemit... Well we know how that turned out haha! Live and learn, I guess. Thanks for leaving a comment! I appreciate it from the bottom of my heart :D