Ah yes, I suppose that would answer how he was able to take said pictures. But:
- He would need to take said hand mirror for that, which would take far more ectosteempowerplasm
- He would need to position said hand mirror for the pictures, after all, most of the art of a good picture (on a smartphone at least) is in positioning the mirror correctly. This would take more ectosteempowerplasm.
- For the second picture he would need to move said hand mirror inland a considerable amount. For that much contact with the outside world he'd practically need enough ectosteempowerplasm to be a whale!
- How did he even move inland that much? It seems implied that he cannot leave the shore he died upon.
- You still haven't answered my previous point that he appears to have no idea how to maneuver modern contraptions.
Though I thank you for trying. You put in a good effort, but it seems you are no match for my wit and my guile. Ok, I should probably stop bragging now.
I've overused this picture, but it just fits so well.
Two words for you: voice command. Fingerless modern conveniences. Shout at one of these contraptions long enough and it will open and do your bidding like....like an oyster cooked in the shell.
That answers absolutely none of my problems except for the last one, and that one only maybe. I wish you luck walking over to a beach, putting a phone down, and yelling "take a picture!" until it does your bidding without using your hands. Yeah, not gonna happen.
Have you ever been to purgatory? If not, then cease your ranting. Where you're going, you don't need hands. I tell you and still you believe it not. Until your time comes, you will not grasp the true physics of the ether.