Congratulations! Not only on the birth of your little one, but also for the seriousness with which you're taking this! :D Five months from now, when you can't remember what a good night's sleep feels like, please come back and read what you just posted. Yes, we have our "pie in the sky" philosophies, but they're good to cling to when the practical realities make us lose sight of the goal. And from a parents' perspective, I don't think you'll regret any of the thoughts you've noted here.
Sometimes I think my husband would've enjoyed having the usual prep time that most fathers do. He had to jump into the deep end when we adopted twins. But as tough as it's been, he's done a great job.
Keeping the flame alive is a challenge. Every wife has different needs. For me, it's the reminder that my husband loves me for more than being a mom. And just like you want your daughter to know that she doesn't have to be perfect for a good man to love her ... your wife needs to know that to. She will probably feel like a failure regularly (no matter how wonderful of a job you think she's doing), so you'll need to remind her that mistakes and all, dinner or no dinner, colicky baby and poopy diaper, she is worthy of your love. She might not believe you when she's still in her pjs, her hair isn't washed, and she forgot to launder your shirts ... but keep telling her ... it'll sink in eventually ;)
As I blog about our journey raising the twins, it's encouraging to find more parents sharing their stories as well. Looking forward to hearing more about your journey as a father!
Thank you so much for this. You are right that I might enjoy reading this in a few months or a few years. :-) I'll keep your tips om keeping the flame alive in my mental bank.