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I first came across @familyprotection a few days ago, after reading a post from @article61 (what a nice person). I am nearly 20yrs old and grew up in care in the UK, I had seven different foster carers between the ages of six and sixteen, I rarely speak about my experience in the system because I find it easier not to think about it, or dwell on the past. Above is the only picture I have of me when I was little, I'm the happy little girl on the left, the happy little girl on the right sent it to me, after we found each other on Facebook, two years ago, we were both 4yrs old in that picture. I have spent hours and hours reading posts tagged with @familyprotection and have found myself looking at that happy little girl in the picture, wondering if I have been lied to all these years.
THIS IS MY STORY
I find it difficult to recollect what exactly happened, maybe I don't want to remember, but I certainly don't remember any kind of physical abuse at home. I can remember my mum and my little brother, trips to the shops, mum taking me to school, I don't remember my dad at all, or any other family really. I was six years old when I was taken from school, two women took me in a car and dumped me at a strangers house. They were the SS, they told me my mum was ill and could no longer take care of me, they introduced me to my new foster family, then left! I never saw my mum or my little brother again. I must have been confused and scared, my mum had taken me to school that morning.
At six years old you don't ask questions, but as the years went on and I got older, I asked plenty, hitting walls of silence every time. I rebelled a lot, got moved from foster home to foster home, because they couldn't cope with me. I turned into a very angry teenager, smoking, drinking, fighting, then I got mixed up with an older crowd, we stole a car, went for a joyride, then set fire to it, I was 14yrs old! I was picked up by the police and ended up in a Juvenile Court.
https://pixabay.com/en/mind-mindset-conflict-suffering-me-2197437/
The judge ordered psychiatric reports before sentencing, I sat down with my then foster mother and broke down. All I wanted to know was what had happened to my mum and brother, why had she left me!! She came with me to the psychiatrist, he was pretty awesome actually, I felt comfortable talking to him. He wrote his report, then came sentencing day!! The judge told me that because I hadn't killed anyone (I wasn't driving the car) and because of my unsettled life and upbringing, he had decided not to send me away (what again) but instead, place a curfew on me, I had to be indoors between the hours of 7pm and 7am. To be honest that was a blessing in disguise, I started talking to my foster mother more, built a bond, then eventually she and my Social Worker sat me down and told me that my mum was a drug addict who could no longer look after me or my brother, he was only two at the time, young enough to be adopted out, I wasn't that lucky!!
https://pixabay.com/en/road-sign-attention-right-of-way-63983/
I calmed down a lot after that, I'd been told the truth finally, I'd accepted that my mum loved her drugs more than she loved her kids and moved on. I did OK in my exams and left school and the system when I was sixteen, my social worker helped me get a place to live, gave me some money for furniture and stuff and released me from foster care, I was on my own. Since reading some of the stories on @familyprotection I find myself wondering if I was told the truth about my mum, surely I would have seen drugs in the house, or her taking drugs, if she was an addict, like they say. Take a look at the picture, I look happy, I don't look like a child that's neglected. I found it easy not visiting that place in my head over the years, but I have a whole bunch of questions now. I have made the decision to try and find my mum, I will be contacting my old social worker to get as much information as I can, if they let me have it.
UPDATE
I rang my social worker this morning, I asked her for my file, she says we will talk about it on her next visit!! Up to the age of 21 I have visits from my social worker every six months, the next visit is due in four months. Can they just fob me off like this or is there something else I can do?
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Thank-you so so much for sharing your story.
Your head must be spinning after reading so many #familyprotection posts.
I hope you much success in finding your real mother so that you can finally get the answers that you need.
Did all of this happen in Bulgaria?
UK was mentioned, but I wish her the best in uncovering the truth as well.
Linda, I have to say it is difficult to absorb all the stories published under the #familyprotection project tag. I come from what we all classify as a "normal" upbringing and learning about how twisted the dark side of our society and governments are is disturbing at best. I am proud of the efforts by you and Mark and will always help support where I can. Thank you for what you both do.
@chatterboxchick Good luck in your journey.
Thanks very much @steempowerpics
Hi @canadian-coconut yes my head is spinning a lot, I'd shut everything away, so I thought. This happened in the UK. I have an update which I'm going to add to this post.
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Sharing your story here, is like announcing that you are Ok,
You have power, plans, dreams and goals to reach.
Never give up.
Thanks @antonella I am OK honestly :)
That story seriously shake me
Unfortunately it happens @doejane
What a story @chatterboxchick. Honestly I don't have the answer to your question,as I come from the Netherlands, and my only experience with CPS is there.. And I honestly don't know if this is the norm there too (tot have these visits until 21 years of age). I would try to find out somehow if this is true, I can't really imagine that you can't have the right to see your files actually. But of course this time frame of 4 months is very convenient for foster care and other agencies to try to disguise things. And my guess is , that they will tell you at that visit, that she will bring your file next visit (so another 6 months time frame). They are some sneaky bastards worldwide is my opinion. Maybe another member here in the community knows more about your rights in the UK. I truly hope so. Take care!
I'm having a look online now to see if I can get any information @anouk.nox I can't imagine a reason why they won't let me have my file. I will update again if I find out anymore :)
I can imagine why if they havent been.honest.. maybe they try to delay you getting the files.. But in Holland for example you just have to write a letter with id copy and then it will take 6 weeks or so.. maybe it works the same there?
Congratulations @chatterboxchick!
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This post has been upvoted and resteemed by #thethreehugs. Thank you for your support of @familyprotection!
I really regret what you had to live at such a young age and your social reactions were the expected ones, especially because you were looking to feel safe somewhere and you never found it, if you can not find your mother, see her again or your brother, those questions will remain unanswered. But, maybe life will give you better. Thanks for telling your story