Oh... simple, I got to up to someone who is crazy and tell him to bribe a politician that I hate, offer to pay them tons of money to do "the deal" for me... then use that scandal to cover up my tracks.

The rest of the money gets buried under an undisclosed home for 3 years minimum. After which I start buying monero with it, slowly but surely, until it dries up, but all over the counter.

Win/Win right there...