You are precious

Recently SHINee's vocal and song writer Jong Hyun committed suicide, which shocked not only K-pop fans but Koreans not interested in K-pop
I heard the shocking news while working

Most of us in our late 20s and 30s in the same office didn't even know who Jong Hyung was, although we know the boy band itself.

Almost every week we happen to read the breaking news about celebritiy's suicide no matter how popular or not they are

In Korea, there's a saying that you don't need to worry about celebrities even if they seem to be categorized into B or C listings. Morning TV shows sometimes brag about their bigger and better houses decorated with free interior products sponsored by interior and furniture companies

Those A-list celebirities' life are quite different from ordinary people who have to struggle with their limited income (2 million won to 5 million won a month )
If you don't have your own house, you have to pay the bank loan and interests which takes up a lot in your income
If you have children, you must spend a large proportion of your income in private education which might give your children opportunies at least to catch up with as much as others.

Given the circumtances of ordinary people who consider the financial problems to be the most important,
Celebrities' life seem to be way better than ours.

When they struggle with the panic attack, or depression, I heard that those struggling with poverty tend to disregard celebrities' mental problems

Koreans tend to avoid seeing a shrink even when they deserately needed the medical advice, since they have the prejudice aginast those getting a couseling from shirink and consider those to be mentally problematic, in other words, they are crazy and mentally ill

Celebrities can fall down with one mistake, while it's very difficult to reach up there
They tend to work out the depression by themselves or ignore the problem

Let me show you those who have committed suicide with depression
Choi Jin Sil (2008)

she was one of the most familiar and popular actresses, failing her marriage, showing the bruise all over her face
Korean were shocked with her being domestic violence victim
But the whole process she had to file for divorce massed up her image being cute and next-door girl
It's been a while since she disappeared on TV after the marriage failed
It seemed to be successful for her to get back on track
Her drama got popularity and so did she
Suddenly while intoxicated, she committed suicide by hanging herself
Her brother and ex husband also committed suicide after she chose to end her life

Lee Eun Ju (2005)

She was well known with her great performance and polished image, proving her great acting with the movie "The Scarlet Letter" where she and Han Seok Gyu starred
She said she was suffering from depression after starring in the movie
of which the plot was very depressing and disgusting

Jeong Da Bin (2007)

She jumped to stardom after starring in the TV drama "The cat in rooftop house"
Her nextdoor girl image made people feel familiar and intimate
One day she was found dead in her boy friend's house before waiting for filming

Park Yong Ha

Park Yong Ha had been popular across Asian contries after the success of the drama" Sonata of winter" which was a mega hit drama where Bae Yong Joon and Choi Ji Woo starred
He got popular with his concerts as a singer owing to the success of acting carreer
He was known for his wide circle in the entertainment world, nice and gentle to everybody.
However those close to him even didn't know he was suffering from depression
People aroun him were shocked with him hanging himself while waiting for his new drama about to start

Kim Seong Min (2016)

He committed suicide after arguing with his wife
He had trouble with drug abuse which had him arrested for 10 months
He came back to acting career on TV show "threesome"

He used to say "I wanna die" while intoxicated
and often talked to his friends "I wanna die"
After he was arrested for drug abuse, he couldn't be on TV, which made him more depressed

I think most of people have felt depressed
Do you remember how you got rid of the feeing?
I used to watch comedy programs all day

There was something in common among those who committed suicide
They send the message they are depressed whether people around them are aware of it or not
Jong Hyun wrote songs related depression
and he spoke a lot about how he felt and how depserately he wanted to feel happy

They say they wanna die
The depressed people tend to say they want to end their lives
If you hear someone saying about suicide or depression,
you shouldn't let them be alone

You should do something
such as calling their family
or letting them see a shrink
or listening to them talking about how hard and depressed they are
I know it must be very difficult to listen to them talking over and over
but
it must be better to be bothered with listening and caring for them
than losing them for good

I used to be very depressed after having a car accident and quitting my job
I felt like all I wanted to do was stopped or hindered by an unvisible hand
I found myself easily angry and prickly while suffering from an inferiority complex
Not working for a while, I couldn't hang out with friends or have a blind date, lacking in money
which made me hate myself and feel depressed

Depression made me helpless
Watching TV all day, feeling blue, taking a pessimistic view of life
Doing nothing, stopping intimate relationship, blocking all the relationship
Thinking negatively whatever, Hating yourself

All the things happen faster than the velocity of light

I could get rid of the depression thanks to God
But if you don't believe in God
I think you need some people around you

The first thing is to open your heart
Tell people how you feel
and get some counseling from shrinks

If you can't afford it, you have to read some books such as self-help books or books on psychology "loving yourself"
You should do something
If you are depressed, you are least likely to do something to get out of the depression
You feel like you are stuck in it
But No, it's not true
You can get out of it
You are precious and significant

Call your friends and tell them how you feel
Ask them to help you
And admit that depression can kill you
Depression is such a serious disease to kill you
When people have cancer, they get chemo therapy or have surgery
When you have depression, you have to be treated
Don't let them kill you

If you have no one to ask for help,
visit churches in your neighborhood
I am sure the pastor would listen to you

When looking back then when I was depressed
I felt like I would never get out of the despair
I would never feel happy or no hope in my life
But it's not true

Now I am happy
I can say that for sure

My life doesn't sail smoothly still
But I always try to think over what I've got
I try to appreciate even smallest things
which give me more chances to say thank you

The feeling which makes you happy is to be loved
You are loved by someone around you

Think about how they would feel if you are not there
You are precious and beatufiul

Open your notebook
jot down what you got
and those you love and those who love you
think about the dream you used to have
and the dream you gave up on
write them down
as detailed as possible

And write down what you want to be

Start to write down
who would feel miserable
do you want to see them feel that way?
do you want to make them sad and mournful?

As a person who used to suffer from depression
I would like to say that
"this, too, shall pass away"

Don't forget you are precious