I think I get your drift. I’ve always had a strange relationship with spirituality. I don’t quite know how to put it into words. While having many spiritual experiences and feeling like there is some kind of presence in this universe, I’ve never believed in established religions. I’ve found some of the stories associated with them interesting and some of the teachings helpful, but I can’t bring myself to worship in a particular fashion and I can’t accept any official story. That’s what I like about living in Japan. There are places to worship at and believe, even while doubting, and there are rituals that are light enough and infrequent enough to easily observe and be moved by, and there is enough privacy and freedom to worship as you wish. I don’t know. I’ve found myself feeling very connected to something over here quite a few times, often, I think that Sonething is nature, setting, and spirit, of some kind.