Your Darkness Will Transform You

in #darkness7 years ago

We live in a world of duality: up and down, left and right, light and dark, good and bad, etc. This sometimes can cause much confusion as to how we are supposed to function in this world because we get caught up in the seemingly endless amount possibilities.

The biggest challenge, however, comes when we go through trauma because when it happens all we know how to do in the moment, as young children typically, is to react. This creates a ripple effect that spreads throughout the entirety of our lives. We separate from the part of ourselves that experienced this trauma in order to be able to survive because it is the only thing we know how to do.

This dualistic world shows us many extremes. One moment we feel like we are soaring above the clouds and nothing can stop us and the next moment we find ourselves falling down an endless spiral of hopelessness. It becomes very challenging because we must learn how to ride both waves.

For most of our lives we have been told what to think, feel, eat and how we should act. A big part of this programming is the suppression of emotions that we are feeling and the fact that we are shunned for feeling emotions.

Our emotions are what makes us humans; embrace them!

The darkness is what really shows us who we are. It is our darkness that tests our virtues and brings out our true character.

This adversity that we experience comes with a price, however. Because it is something we must go through to become the person we need to become, we could unknowingly get lost within this dark void.

When we get lost within the void, we forget who we truly are. Instead of seeing ourselves for our true divine potential, we begin to see our identity as our darkness.

This is the trap that so many people on this planet get caught up in. The only way for us to escape it is not around it or away from it, but through it. It is in going through this dark void with an objective frame of mind and faith in ourselves and our ability to become stronger that will ultimately lead us to a triumphant victory!

I should also point out that darkness is NOT bad or evil. This darkness is just suppressed, scared and misunderstood. Think about that scared little 7 year old version of yourself that all you feel you can do is cry and hide. This misunderstood aspect of ourselves are what create the programs that keep us trapped and keep us perpetuating the destructive aspects of ourselves.

It is time for us to embrace our full, true selves in both the light and the darkness. The bridge between the two polarities is LOVE. With love we will transcend this darkness that have controlled us for so long. Once we embrace this darkness within ourselves we will be able to help others embrace it for themselves as well. When we come together in love and unity we will transform this world, together! <3

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Hey, I completely forgot to let you know that this post is featured in this week’s Comment Challenge. Maybe you already figured that out. 😉
I hope it will bring you something good. 👍 @amariespeaks, this week’s guest judge, did the great work of finding the post of yours.
I wish you a nice day!

Wow, I'm so grateful for the support @danielsaori and @amariespeaks! I am still new to Steemit and having trouble understanding some of these rules, contests and the general way that this platform flows. But I actually didn't know it was featured and was checking out the comments.

I am overwhelmed with gratitude and I hope that it helps many people to encourage and inspire them to continue moving forward. Also, to show them that they have the power within themselves to overcome any circumstances that life throws at them. Thanks again, much love! <3

thank you @danielsaori I was wondering if I should have mentioned this to @mediationmann lol!

I loved this post and all the thoughts and emotions it brought up as I read it. You did a great job and it is so cool seeing everyone's reactions. :)

Ok here are two problems you didn't mention. Problem number one is primary education and patterns we got even before we know for ourselves. Well, this is so called programming. Humans are programmed until the age of four. And some changes are happening even when we are embryos in warm moms belly. There were tests when they recorded moms F-words and a newborn was reacting to this words. Some stress hormones were in blood. Because even mom has them when she was pissed off. So you are what you are even before you know anything about surrondings.

And when we are at hormones. Those little bastards are the culprits for this so-called darkness. It is not dark until your hormones will say so. This is why depression is present in those situations. Our brains are getting bad chemicals and we are recting like this and see dark instead solutions. And these hormones are controlled even trough your gut. Bacterias in the colon can make you happy or sad. we are just getting into this microbiological research, so there will be some great findings of this.

And of course, You can reprogramme your self. You just need to know what are the triggers, how to react and find a solution. To achieve this is a hard and long path. There are some changes needed. Even some sport and diet, you know to get those hormonal balance back and see the light instead of dark.

Here is a nice flower for all who thinks there is only a dark side. It is not, but only you can find way out. Sure it can help you to take some pills and balance chemicals in your head. But for long run go for the change of life.

Ladybug.jpg

I did not know our mothers could have such an effect on us. But I have recently began learning about how the gut flora is essential in the process of restoring lost serotonin in the brain, which is a huge part in the process of helping us feel happy.

Transcending darkness is a very difficult thing because it is different for all of us. But we are here to teach and learn from each other. So if we help each other through these issues, it allows us understand more about what it means to be human and what it means to thrive and survive on this beautiful planet.

Life is a challenge, but if we listen to the messages we receive and learn from the experiences that we go through, then we will transform. This transformation will begin to spread to others around ud, until their transformation happens and it spreads to people around them. If this process continues, then it would alter the entire collective and everyone in it!

Indeed. Here are differences from good Steemit users and milking ones. I am happy to share something I know or see with others and vice versa. Ouuu and isn't it interesting the fact the most depression people comes from developt countries. Most of them have good everything. House, job, food, even lovely families. And on the other side, you have poor ones from the third world (I hate this phrase) who haven't got anything but still... no sign of depression, just hunger, and bad mood when he knows some fucks somewhere are wasting food and crying because their mom doesn't understand them.

Today was a bad day for me. And then I found your post. Your post made my day a little better Thanks :)

Life can be so difficult and it feels like it keeps us down and holds us there, sometimes. But every so often we are able to see a glimmer of light shining through this darkness. That glimmer of hope is enough to pull someone out of the deepest depths and be able to rise above it. It's easy to forget how big the little things have and how much it could change somebody's day, which could in-turn potentially change that person's life, forever.

It is this light that we have to shine into the lives of others to pull them out of their darkness. Although we ourselves possess the power to do it, it is very easy to get lost and forget that. I believe we are here to help remind each other of this, that when we fall down we must come together and pick each other up.

Thank you so much for sharing your comment! I know it's tough, but it's nice to know there are people there to help pick us up when we get knocked down. I know I have received it from other people enough in my life that I feel the only thing to do is to be the same inspiration others have been to me and pay it forward.

It makes my day knowing that I was able to impact your life in a positive way. Much love to you my friend <3

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Just like the saying..at the end of the tunnel,der is light

For most of our lives we have been told what to think, feel, eat and how we should act. A big part of this programming is the suppression of emotions that we are feeling and the fact that we are shunned for feeling emotions.
Our emotions are what makes us humans; embrace them!

          " A big part of this programming" the most important 6 words that people really need to think about. "get over it already!" "no need to cry about it it happened it's over" "do you really care" "you are not 7 years old anymore" "move past it" People need to think what is the programming, the feeling a person has that leads others to those reactions, or the reactions people have toward your feelings?
          To "get over it" leads a person no where, it is the understanding of the feeling that will set the person free, that understanding will not be achieved overnight, and that some understanding will take a life time to figure out. A person should never get over the feeling. Asking them to do something like that is the equivalent of telling them they should cut their toe off when they are hopping around like crazy in pain from stubbing it. Why people always want other people to kill parts of what make them who they are I will never understand.
          Keep your feelings, keep your toe, keep your ego. They are all part and parcel of what make you you.

The darkness is what really shows us who we are. It is our darkness that tests our virtues and brings out our true character.

I agree with you, and I also want to bring it up to another level. If darkness is all the negative feelings that we have, then "darkness is something that helps us grow"

By being scared, we learn to avoid danger.
By being anxious, we have the urge to try to find a solution.
By feeling lonely, we try to reconnect with our family and friends.
By reaching a dead end, we try to find a way out of comfort zone.
etc.

So those dark negative feelings are the ones that actually help us grow. To expand our capabilities, to help us learn the dangers, to navigate us through trials and errors. We should embrace and welcome them. Use the darkness inside us to grow.

I couldn't agree with you more friend! It's funny how the universe works sometimes because we experience certain things like being scared, lonely, etc and this causes us to react to the world in a different way than we would have otherwise. So instead of going out with our friends, we decide to stay in because we are feeling a bit down that day.

But this moment that you take for yourself could end up being just a moment to relax, catch up on some things or maybe get some much needed sleep and rest. Or it could even be something that forever changes our lives.

I have had situations work out in a way that seemed not ideal, but turned out to be one the greatest experiences of my life! It's all because I chose to follow my emotions and being open to the lessons they are trying to teach me.

When we surrender to the flow of the universe, we will come to understand more as to why things happen the way they did. It is this that strengthens our faith and strengthens our mental and physical endurance. Because at the end of the day we know deep down that we are taken care of, all we have to do is react in the most fluent manner possible and ride that wave. When we ride the wave our, there is no telling where it will take us! :)

I'm 100% Agree with every word you have written in this post.
This is our life is all about. Happiness can never teach us, it's the sorrow that teaches us how to live in bad or sad circumstances.
It teaches us how to tackle these bad days.
For the darkness part of this post, Darkness is what we feel in our inner, we feel the emptiness, and this darkness let us think what is missing and this brings us back to our God, then we start praying with our full passion,
Then we found the real meaning of our life, for what we are here,
we are here for helping others in the best way possible.
and you talked about a 7-year-old child who has fear of this world, who fear to fall. In the last week I've seen this fear in my 58-year aunt, she just fell from bike and her hip bone was broken and She just had operation for it, Whenever we try to move her from one place to another, I saw fear in her eyes and her that fear reminds me the of our childhood fear, In this part of life we just need love of our loved ones, nothing else.
and also that love can get you out from that darkness you feel inside of you.
Thanks
Regards Abdulmananu

Happiness can teach us things, but yes happiness is more to truly take the time to be in the moment and appreciate what we do have. I have learned much from happiness simply because I am in the right state of mind for the thoughts, feelings and emotions that I need in order to manifest the life of my dreams. But darkness is what ultimately leads us down the path of personal transformation. And besides, I love a good challenge! :D

Unfortunately, many people, especially the older generation, have fears that are rooted back to when they were children. As we go through life we still have that inner child within us. The thing we must realize, however, is that we must use our inner child to create the world we wish to live in and use the adult version of ourselves to actually bring those things into the physical reality. Just like the Tao shows us, we live in a world of duality and our inner child and inner adult are also part of this dualistic world. So we must come together with ourselves and master both worlds!

:) Thanks for more elaboration of what i wanted to convey :)

Can we understand it this way too?

Gold sparkles as the daylight when it has gone through a section of high intense heat in the fire furnace. The Goldsmith passes through hell of heat putting in a worthwhile effort to refine the raw gold, then beaten to form adorable instruments.

Just like the Goldsmith passes through hell of heat, we might have to confront heaps of issues, that might seemingly cause us to drop down our hands, a way to surrending to defeats.

The darkness is what really shows us who we are. It is our darkness that tests our virtues and brings out our true character.

Through the hell of heat, the Goldsmith endures. The Goldsmith's darkness is the endurance he shows through the section of high-heating the raw gold to what becomes adorable instrument(s).
Similarly, our darkness test our virtue and brings out the very best in us as individuals.

In turn, the endurance shown in our dark times builds or forms deep rooted love in us .

In turn, love lift us up and also help to accommodate others, thus, impacting the world positively, just like as the Goldsmith benefits at the end from the whole stress and other lovers of gold.

Well thought out piece, that threw me into the world of high intense meditation of the heart. @meditationmann, Good Job!

That's a very good analogy @samal to use because just as the goldsmith knows, it is an art to craft such beautiful work. Life is a giant canvas for which we are both the artist and art itself. The more we experience and the more we come to understand about ourselves and the world around us, the better and more intricate our art piece will be.

The goldsmith works countless hours day and night in order to perfect his craft and if we wish to be successful in this world and live the life of our dreams, we must be willing to do the same thing. It does not come easy and we must be willing to put in the work and endure the heat if we wish to ultimately perfect our craft and become the best that we can be.

Thank you so much for your comment, I'm so glad it touched you at a heartfelt level. That means the world to me friend. Much love <3

This is beautiful @meditationmann! :)♥

The darkness is what really shows us who we are. It is our darkness that tests our virtues and brings out our true character.

This reminds me of a quote I've written on my journal some months ago. "Adversities are temporary. What is permanent is what we become by the way we react to them."

I have had episodes of my life that led me to be at my lowest points. I lost jobs - that I have been very passionate about. I lost people. I've been made topic for many gossip mongers. And the biggest blow was losing my mother. Along with losing her was our family losing most of what we owned. It was a struggle for a while. We had relatives who were and weren't very supportive. We ached.

Personally, I wanted to hate all the situations that brought me down. I know I don't deserve them, I mean, no one does. But, you'll never know how to be strong until being strong is your only option. When you are strong, it radiates and it becomes a light to other people who are sharing your darkness too.

It is very scary when there is so little light that darkness becomes normal.

Darkness exists but so does light, thus no one should dwell in the dark.

Thank you for reminding me, that I wanted to write about shadow work. ❤️
I mastered the darkness, to bring you the light
Much love and keep your articles flowing!

It is easy to forget my friend, but when we learn to walk our path embodying our own sense of individuality while simultaneously coming together as one collective force, the shadows begin to fade. As you said, master the darkness to bring forth the light. So many people forget this, preaching "love and light." Which are 2 incredible things, but are not all encompassing. In order for us to embrace all that is, we must fill our hearts with love and unity. This honors both the light and the darkness that is needed for us to become our greatest versions. Much love to you as well <3

Very well said! I learned a lot about real shadow work through the Gene Keys, that have also become a huge part of work with clients. With them, you see the shadow as a constant reminder of the gifts you are here to embody. So the shadow is not something you try to get rid of once and for all (as in: "let´s kill the shadow"), but a constant reminder of the love and light that you are. I will prepare an article about it today. Thank you for sharing your insights! ❤️

That is so very true! It took me awhile to understand that because I have seen so many people in my life struggling, not able to gain footing and ground themselves. I learned through helping them that the path is through it and as you said, "a constant reminder of the love and light that you are." That is crucial in knowing that the darkness within ourselves and the people in our lives the most are there to bring out aspects of ourselves so we can ultimately shine our gifts upon the world and transform ourselves and everyone around us <3

What a great post @meditationmann. Really good work mate.

I love this post because I can relate to pretty much everything that is said. It stirred up in me lessons I have learned but forget to focus on and made me look at some things from new perspectives.

We separate from the part of ourselves that experienced this trauma in order to be able to survive because it is the only thing we know how to do.

Man, how true this is! Speaking from experience, when I experienced trauma as a child, it forced certain dichotomies to rise up. In my limited way of thinking, I thought either the people who are supposed to protect me are incapable and deeply flawed, or there is something deeply flawed within me. Safety is paramount for children, so we prioritize keeping our guardians blameless. That forces the issue inward. It must be me. I must be defective. The next step is to take those broken pieces, bury them deep, and never look back.

The relationship between trauma and triggers fascinates. I had a therapist once describe them as 10-2 reactions. Something happens that should warrant a level 2 reaction, but I respond with a forceful 10. What the heck? It is literally like that thing takes you all the way back to the origination of the wound.

Our emotions are what makes us humans; embrace them!

Amen. I don't know if the massive suppression of emotions is exclusively a male experience, but it is very clear the culture actively discourages boys from being emotional. What a scandal.

Instead of seeing ourselves for our true divine potential, we begin to see our identity as our darkness.

^That is a powerful truth right there. Yes, we must go through the darkness (I call it the wasteland), but it is also dangerous. While burying the emotions is a terrible coping mechanism, it does provide some shelter from the heavy feelings. Diving head first into that space and tearing down all of those walls can easily send us into spirals. Negative acting out can actually increase as we start to do this work. It usually gets worse before it gets better.

I think that is why it is so important to have a community that walks with you. Ultimately, this is your journey and no one else can do the work of walking through your darkness. But their love and companionship will go with you and help keep you safe.

I think I should wrap up this ramble! I really liked your post and thanks for sharing your insights!

Cheers,
Sam

"Our emotions are what makes us humans embrace them"- this statement summarises or rather is a clear formular to understanding how life works.Our everyday experiences and how we handle them moulds us into the person you and i are today.
Life experiences are so important and as such one shouldn't feel as though the world is against such a person. These things make u stronger. Its hard i know and ofcourse you will have several emotions. own those emotions. I think we all need to understand each other and try to live a relatively peaceful life. No one is bad or good. What you see as negative(darkness) or positive has its lessons, you just need to have an open mind.

A lovely piece you've got here @meditationmann. While reading this post, the first thing that came to my mind was a song by Deon Jackson, titled ''Love makes the world go round ''.
It does not matter whether it's darkness or light that fills the world, as long as love is available, the world will keep going round.

Darkness and light are just natural entities, they are neither good nor bad. It all depends on your mindset.

As a vivid example, we all know that gold is not shinny and sparkling in the ground, but rather it is dirty and unattractive. But the moment it passes through the furnace, under very high temperature and pressure, it looses all its impurities, and becomes the gold we all desire. You see that the darkness in the form of a furnace, was actually aimed at making the gold a better gold. That seeming darkness (unimaginable heat) , was the road the gold required to follow to get to its attractive state.

Another example. For those who hate to sleep with the lights switched on, the moment you switch on the light, they would immediately yell at you to switch of the light. Their mindset at that point is that light is bad, and darkness is good. Darkness and light are not bad things in themselves, it is the mindset with which you view them that determine whether they becomes bad of good.

Let's us cultivate the mindset of not complaining during dark periods, but let us through the instrument of love, cultivate a learning mindset, and hence be able to use this darkness for good, by being of help to our neighbors who go through similar situations, hence making the world go round through our actions of love.

The darkness is what really shows us who we are, you write in your post, however, I think it is the relationships with others that show us who we are, the others are the mirror we have of ourselves. The relationship with our parents, brothers, friends and acquaintances, is programming our personality. It is true that darkness gives us the opportunity to see, to experience a part of ourselves that is hidden. But, I think it does not define us. It is my opinion. Congratulations for your post, very interesting.

A very awesome post @meditationmann. I was interested in it first because @danielsaori directed me to your page, but then when I read the post, I found out that it was about a discussion am passionate about - getting stronger through darkness

In my 27 years of experience here on earth, I have come to realize that there is not one person here on earth who will avoid some sort of struggle, darkness or ‘desert experience’ in life. For the very fact that you are a human being, alive and breathing means that you are prone to experiencing all that life has to offer – the celebrations and mourning, wins and losses, good and evil, light and darkness.

Truth be told, the experiences we have during dark times are usually not pleasant, that’s why they are called ‘dark times’. During these times, we ask questions like ‘why me?’

While writing this comment, the loss of my dad while I was still a teenager became fresh again in my mind, that feeling of being lost in the deepest pit of darkness, with no ray of light to cling unto as a hope for tomorrow. So I know firsthand what it is like to be in darkness.

But what we don’t realize (which when I realized helped be overcome my grief) is that darkness is a gift from life itself. Every struggle, pain, or sorrow you go through is a gift. It is a gift because it is only in dark rooms that people search for light. Darkness brings you to your knees, questioning the true purpose of your existence. It is a gift because it makes you look deep into yourself to discover the treasures lying dormant in you.

There is a popular quote “What does not kill you makes you stronger”. That is so true. That means that a darkness that you don't allow to overcome you makes you stronger. So we can say that darkness can produce good benefits if handled properly. When you are faced with darkness, you have a choice to either give up or to draw from the well of treasures that flows within you, and come through it better and stronger than you were before the darkness.

Finally, we all have heard of a lot of testimonies of people who were grateful for the darkness they experienced in the past, stating that it made them much better people. They did not testify for talking sake, but meant every bit of what they said. I know this because I am part of this group of people. My darkness of the death of my father was tough and hard, but am grateful to God for it, because that darkness was what contributed to me being born-again, having a relationship with God, which is the best experience a person can ever have (IMO).

So, I invite everyone reading this post to come join us – a group of people that are thankful for their dark experiences. Don’t run from your darkness, but rather embrace it so that you can come out brighter and better, like pure gold from the burning furnace.

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Wow, this is a very good post and deep in its meanings. I love your analysis and the way you simplified such a complex topic. Its true what you said about the duality that many think in terms of, and what many do not recognize is that there is a group of people that exploit this human tendency.

I also believe that the solution is "love"... That's why the people in power use the opposite of love, "hate" to divide us.

hate recipe.png

Until we understand that "love" is the answer, this wonderful world we have been blessed with will continue to be underappreciated. I agree completely with you too that it starts within yourself!

This Post by @meditationmann is a very thought provoking subject. Without trauma in our lives, there are many important aspects of humanity that are extremely difficult to achieve without it. One of the most important I believe is empathy. Without empathy we cannot put ourselves in someone else’s shoes for a day to imagine what life is like for them. Another important personality trait which is developed through trauma is compassion, for without experiencing trauma in our own lives it is very difficult to have compassion for those that have experienced trauma in their own. In my humble opinion, empathy and compassion are 2 of the most important traits that someone can have and when I have met people in this lifetime who are lacking in these areas it is a very ugly and disappointing experience. From my own experiences, i have found that people with large amounts of empathy and compassion are very caring people and while I do not wish trauma on anyone, I am very thankful that it creates a more loving and caring world for us to live in. It is a necessary part of the human experience that makes life so much more worth living. Without knowing what is bad, how can we know what is good. Without knowing sadness, how can we know joy. Every emotion, trait, and experience we have has a flip side for a reason. Without the flip side we would not be human.

Life is always in phases. The good and the bad. Smooth and rough. Some times we might be passing through the negative phase. It will not always be raining season, some times it will be hard and tough.
The dark moments are not meant to kill us but to build us. This thought inspired to put up a post yesterday titled
FAILED TO SUCCEED | SEEING FAILURE DIFFERENTLY

That one has or is passing through a dark moment does not mean that the person will remain there forever. It's just a phase that will pass with time.
And within this period one needs be strong and see the light approaching from the end of the tunnel.

I could remember in 2015 when i lost my dad just two weeks to my first semester exams in my third year in the university. It was heavy but i told myself i was not going to cry because crying will only destabilize me and make me not to focus on my exams. So i had to let it go and pretend as though nothing but yet it was painful because i was the closest to my dad but for the sake of my future, i endured the pains and life went on.

So if we can see the dim light from afar, we can scale through the darkness.

I wrote my comment in the contest, but I want to add, we should be grateful that we have the ability to hear and see! Yesterday while I was teaching my ESL students a Mother of a blind female girl wanted to know if I could help her learn English, her daughter was blind, I said sure, I have audio files so my students can learn and speak English in a better way. That girl does not know what light or darkness means, she has no vision, for her it has been the same ever since she was born, so We must be grateful and bold to just face every situation as a winner, every single day of our lives!