Hello @fukumineko and I'm glad you're hosting a contest that will awaken to any same situation as what you had experienced. I can't judge people with suicidal feelings cause I never been in their shoes. Some people say, a high IQ person mostly has a low EQ that leads them to suicide. In my own opinion, it depends on the person on how strong they are... I had a cousin who committed suicide, another friend and my friend's brother. They decided to end up their life without any reason left behind. A different person with different problems. I can't blame them. So here's my sad moment experienced in my past...

A lot of people will consider my story as a common in each family. Losing someone very special is the saddest thing in my life. 10 years ago, my mom got very ill that cause cancer and leads her to death. She's a public teacher, but need to take a rest for how many months because of her cancer, so it means she will not get any salary as well. I was working at Luzon then, but need to stop my job to take care of my mom. We both don't get any salary at all, no more savings due to her expensive medicine that needs to maintain. I'm the only daughter and my father passed away when I was 2 years old. My relatives supported us but they can't support our financial problems. So I struggle searching for some help from different administrations in our City even our Mayor, begging for my mom's medication. Lucky me, I have a very close friend who works in Japan as a welder. He always supported me and send money for my mom. But he also has his family to support, so I tried to do my best to find money. We experienced without having food anymore, but my aunt gave some food to eat. Staying at the hospital for so long makes me weak too and for mom who decided to stay at home because we all had credit to all the hospital. I was so down that time, I felt alone facing those trials. Sometimes I left my mom alone in the hospital just to get or borrow money from my friends for my mom's daily medicine. I'm asking God, why He gave me this problem, why my mom who suffered too much of her cancer. So what I did is pray... I prayed that He will give me strength and never give up on this trials... I almost give up, I'm sick and tired... Until one day, I decided to make a crochet coin purse to sell to some of my friends, an additional money for the medicine... I felt hope that time, it only cost less but I'm happy they helped me to sell my homemade crochet coin purse. And most especially to my ever dear friend who always supported me not only financially but by lifting me up not to give up on my problem.

Then one sad moment has come, the death of my mom. It broke me so much, and the pain still there. Imagining my life without her, alone and broke. It's the most painful thing I ever had. I cried too much, every night but I'm glad I survived! I live my life alone, consider myself a strong person maybe? Reaching my goal and got married to my wonderful family. I can say when you lose someone, there's another best thing will happen or come to you. I never think about suicide but I was totally broke that moment of my life. With the help of my friends and some relatives, it makes me strong and continues my journey!

I am now happy with my new family! So don't be easily discouraged with your life, talk to someone if you can, cry, shout or find ways to release your pain and outlet to lessen your luggage. It's not too late to waste our life...