Finish the Story Contest - WEEK #14

in #contest6 years ago (edited)

Finish the sentence - earn SBI shares and upvotes!.v3.png


A contest with a pot of 3 @steembasicincome shares + SBD payout, where everyone wins? You're in the right place!

48 @steembasicincome shares distributed so far through the contest!


Dear fictio-holics friends, our Finish The Story Contest will keep its collaborative writing tradition alive with a special guest. After the memorable contributions of @marcoriccardi, @improv and @carneasadafilms, I'm pleased to introduce you @ntowl!

Here's a brief introduction about her:

@ntowl is a freelance copywriter with dreams of being a published author. Her writing is all over the web, but most of it belongs to other people who paid her to write it. She came to Steemit to put the focus back on her own writing, and maybe make a few pennies while refining her craft. She enjoys sharing what she knows with others during her live writing classes and her blog. In real life, she’s a homeschooling mom that teaches physics at an alternative education non-profit.



Try to post your story the earliest possible and not at the last moment! Publishing early is going to give it more visibility within the contest community and a higher chance for it to be appreciated and upvoted!

Things that please the Bananafish mighty god!


  • Sustain, comment and upvote each other as a true group of friends and fiction lovers.
  • Post your contribution early.
  • Respect the 500 words limit.
  • Post in your blog instead than in the comment section.
  • Vote your favorite story.
  • help our contest & workshop to grow by giving it some visibility.

And now.. let me introduce you today's story!

It's not about the Tortillas.. at least not the first part - grin -



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Into the Woods


The clouds rolled in as Sharon parked in her driveway. She sat there for a few minutes before going inside, pondering the immensely bad day she’d had.
It started off with her being late for work, the first time in nine years. Her boss had been waiting for her reports, and her lateness made him late which made him unhappy. No, unhappy wasn’t the word. Unhinged fit better. She’d left his office feeling assaulted and ashamed at having performed so poorly, even though she had been the top sales manager for five years running. Walking back to her office she thought it all felt a bit off - too intense for being a mere ten minutes late.
But before she could think about it for long, she was hit by a cart full of old desktop computers the IT guy was taking to recycle. The metal cart had ripped her nylons and left her with a bloody gash on her left calf and bruising on her thigh and hip. He hadn’t even apologized but instead glared at her as he picked up the equipment that had fallen to the ground.
The rest of the day continued like that. Everything went wrong from the vending machine taking her money without dispensing her granola bar to the afternoon coffee burning her hand. The harrowing drive home topped it off, and she considered herself lucky to have just lost a fender to a drunk, uninsured motorist.
Finally opening the car door, she glanced up at the sky. The clouds looked thick, but WeatherBug had said the rain would hold off until tomorrow. Not that she cared. She needed to run and shake off the day even if it poured and even if she was bruised and sore.
She changed into her workout clothes and grabbed her headphones before going back outside to the road. Her usual playlist blasting a little louder than usual, she headed north to the trail. It was her usual 10 km route she ran when she needed to think - or de-stress. Her body would move on autopilot while her brain sorted everything out so that by the time she returned home she’d feel normal and relaxed.
The trail into the woods looked a little darker than usual, but she thought it should with the clouds coming in. She didn’t even pause as she went from pavement to forest floor. Another half kilometer and the trees opened up onto a large pond, a swamp really except for the beavers that had built their dams to fill it up. She always slowed a little on this part of the trail to see if she could catch them working. She admired their persistence and ingenuity.
The mound that made their lodge wasn’t too far from the trail, but she had difficulty seeing it. She slowed even more but was unable to focus on it - as if it were twilight when the shapes and shadows blended together. But it wasn’t that late. She looked behind her, and she could see everything just fine.
Stopping, she stared at the beaver lodge and thought she could see a black haze swirling around it. Then she noticed the water. It too was black and seemed to have a dark fog floating just above the surface. Concerned more than worried, she started running again along the trail that continued into the woods. She thought she'd get a better view from the other side of the pond.


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Join the fun! Here is how this contest works:


  1. An unfinished fiction story or a script is posted.

  2. You finish it with your own post or a comment in the comment section. A limit of 500 words is recommended.

  3. YOU WIN! 3 @steembasicincome shares to the writers with the best ending + SBD payout between all the participants who won't get one of the 3 shares.


    The result will be out on Monday 4th June, 14:00 PM - two o' clock in the afternoon California time zone. Submission deadline: Monday 4th May, 12:00 PM - noon, California time zone



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The @bananafish has come between us!


You might have noticed a strange entity wondering between the stories.. yes, the GOD reincarnated in a Steemit account! The aim of @bananafish will be to sustain the storytellers through a voting trail (I and @marcoriccardi already added ourselves to the trail using Steemvoter). Also, anyone that wishes to write something through the Bananafish account can contact me..this is our creature and who knows how the @bananafish will evolve in the future!




If you like this contest..SPREAD THE GOSPEL! I'm grateful for your resteeming and word of mouth. Everything helps to help us grow together!

GOOD LUCK, BRAVE STORYTELLERS!

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Courtesy of the awesome @pixiehunter!


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...Give a try to this hilarious contest by @improv. A must!

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The Atlanta festival is getting closer.. fingers crossed ✌️

It's live now until June 17th. Most votes gets $100. Audio on Soundcloud. Just go to the comments of this weeks entry to find the link. LOL

Will do that when at home!

I'm so glad Sharon found her long lost friend and all that darkness became something wonderful.

Gosh darn it, am trying to jump to your story, but steem must be having issues. Been lots of lag anywhere I try to jump to. Will try again soon.

If nominations are still a thing, I will just nominate since this won a heart-pitched coin-toss between this post and @Calluna's post. If we are allowed give multi-nominations: this, @Calluna's and @cheeka's posts.

Duly noted.

"Your tripping dawg." Sharon's pet Weather Bug explained to her. She glanced over to her shoulder, just to see her weather bug staring at her with a cold, blank, and emotion-less stare that only a bug could accomplish. Her pet bug then further explained, "You've been running around this water fountain in circles and all this brand new potting soil is all over the place! Please stop, I am really dizzy!" Sharon never had her Weather Bug do anything but somehow predict the weather accurately. Why now? Her pet Weather Bug always was so bland, sterile and predictable up until now. What exactly was happening, she didn't know.

Nothing was making sense. Was she running in circles around this fountain or was her bug lying to her. That's when she realized that she was so stressed that she forgot where she was and it was amazing how she now felt. Her Weather bug had now become her own personal Yoda, the potting soil had become a magical black fog while the fountain was transformed into a vast pond. Truly her bad day had sent her into such a delusional state that she found bliss in front of the local elementary school's water fountain, that was dedicated to an innocent victim of a drunk driver.

Sharron then looked over at the forest across the pond. There were no more clouds and now ample sun. A clear image of a mountain emerged. That's when Sharon thought out loud "I better stop running in circles and tackle that mountain!"


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In the end, this is my favorite one for this round! It's simple, but effective!

This was a fun ending. Good luck in today's contest. 👏

@dynamicgreentk in the house! Man, I think that this is your best one so far.

Her Weather bug had now become her own personal Yoda

This cracked me up and I started laughing in my office like an idiot.

That's when Sharon thought out loud "I better stop running in circles and tackle that mountain!"

This is a clever way to leave a deep message in the shape of a story. That's the way!

Very original! I didn't expect the nervous breakdown

Week #15 is out and waiting for you, the earliest you post the better!

Here my entry to the contest, @f3nix. I hope it's to everyone's liking.

Cuando se acercó, estaba sudorosa y su aliento estaba un poco entrecortado. Se acercó y notó que la mancha se estaba haciendo más extensa y oscura. ¿Qué podría ser? Miró el cielo. Las nubes amenazaban con descargarse con toda su furia, a pesar de que WeatherBug había dicho que la lluvia aguantaría hasta mañana. Fue muy mala idea salir. Tendría que irse a casa lo antes posible. Sintió un sonido detrás. Se dio la vuelta y con una mirada panorámica miró el bosque. La oscuridad empezaba a envolverlo todo. Trató de calmarse: aunque era poco probable, algunos animales probablemente estaban acechando en los árboles en ese momento. Se inclinó para atarse las trenzas de sus zapatos. Debía irse, pero un ruido más fuerte hizo que se pusiera de pie. Miró el agua y un número infinito de olas alrededor de la mancha oscura hizo temblar las hojas esparcidas en el estanque. Este día había sido un día de mierda, pensó. Tendría que acelerar el ritmo antes de que empezara a llover. Intentó caminar, pero su cuerpo no respondió. Trató mil veces mover las piernas y el cuerpo, pero todos los intentos fallaron. Tuvo miedo. La oscuridad empezaba a ser una amenaza. Sintió que la tierra se movía, a pesar de sí misma, también la sensación de que sus pies echaban raíces en la capa de hojas secas. Ineficazmente, trató de justificar su parálisis: el golpe, el cansancio, el día de mierda que había tenido. Miró por todas partes y sólo el sonido del silencio rompió sus tímpanos. Como si estuviera fuera de su cuerpo, vio sus delgadas piernas envueltas en una costra de madera. Estaba segura de que estaba alucinando: un nivel bajo de azúcar en la sangre podría ponerla en esa situación. Cerró los ojos y trató de respirar tranquilamente, una y otra vez. Sus pulmones estaban empezando a doler, y también sus hombros. Como en un sueño, de su cuerpo rígido comenzaba a brotar filamentos y ramas, considerables y pequeñas. Abrió los ojos y ante su mirada perdida, gruesas gotas comenzaron a caer.
A la mañana siguiente, cualquiera que hubiese visto la imagen del bosque habría dicho con certeza que esos árboles estaban allí desde el principio del mundo. Excepto uno, uno grande cerca del estanque. Sharon, como en un sueño, vio que los pájaros hacían sus casas encima de ella y alguien, con un cuchillo afilado, le hacía un corazón.

I like it! A new life of calm and contemplation for the poor, stressed Sharon. ¡Me encantó!

Supernatural and dreamy, I liked it! Nancy you may want to edit it because there's a bit of mess between he/she in the writing. It's good to see you back :-))

Well described and frightening scene. Sharon is always a she though, but otherwise great!

I wish someone would carve me a 💓. Good luck in today's contest. 👏

Fantastic idea with a unique idea for transformation, Nancy! I'll be thinking twice before I go near a swamp on a dark day. tip!

Hi @nancybriti! You have received 0.1 SBD tip from @brisby!

@brisby wrote lately about: Distraction Feel free to follow @brisby if you like it :)

Earn daily income on steem: @tipU distributes 100% profit + 60% curation rewards to all investors.

Week #15 is out and waiting for you, the earliest you post the better!

Hi @cheekah, welcome back to the contests ✌️

Thank you @f3nix

Love the description of Vienna! You put that dark fog to good use.

Ciao Bruni! Even this time you've been an early bird.. awesome!

I took your advice and changed my schedule around so I wouldn't submit on the last day.

Her day didn't get much better did it? Or did it? Love the uncertainty at the end!

Here's my entry!
https://steemit.com/fiction/@marcoriccardi/into-the-woods-finish-the-story-contest-week-14
This time I included an italian translation too ;)

I liked that you also included the band de las Tortillas, @marcoriccardi!;)

Yes it was too funny, they came back from the rear door 😂

Here be me submission for this contest.

Welcome back to the contest ✌️

“I’m back!” - T-800

Hello my friends. Last week I was a little off, but now I'm back!
Here is my entry
Hope you'll like it!

Good to see you back @anixio! I'm sure we will ;-)

I don't see people voting for their favorite...
Maybe you could change the concept a little. When you declare winners, list all non-winers as well and give the crowd or contestants 7 more days to decide the last winner. I belive @calluna does something like that im her contest.
This week I vote for @calluna, I liked her story the most.

Thank you for being purposeful @anixio, this form of collaboration is precious for me. Every measure has to be weighted with the engagement level, which here is growing. There's a philosophy behind this contest: less rules, more crowd behaviours. If the crowd doesn't feel it, for now I won't go further, other than reminding it (some have still issues with the Monday/Wednesday schedule, go figure.. 😉).

First time giving this a go, here is my entry

https://steemit.com/horror/@calluna/into-the-woods-finish-the-story-contest

Thank you very much!

Welcome to my ongoing fiction workshop @calluna, a renowned colleague contest maker ..I hope you will find the atmosphere of your liking!

Did this a few days later than planned, but I have jumped in.
https://steemit.com/finishthestory/@pixiehunter/finish-the-story-contest-week-14

it's great to have you onboard Pixie!

Hi everyone, here is mine. https://steemit.com/writing/@giddyupngo/original-flash-fiction-into-the-woods
Thanks @crypto.piotr for the justify tip. I tried it on mine, what a difference!

I would like to vote for this ending by @giddyupngo for your contest today @f3nix. I don't know how you can choose from such great endings @f3nix, better you than me. I'm gonna go sign some contracts. 😂

Indeed it does look nicer @giddyupngo (at least that's my impression)

yours
Piotr

Welcome back Giddy! Yes I tried that too in my last article, there's a great difference indeed. Just it seems that I cannot use the italic in the justified part..

Good luck to everyone! Here's my submission for this week F3nix!
https://steemit.com/contest/@brisby/from-the-murk-a-finish-the-fiction-story

Bris jumping in the boat right before it leaves the pier! (I just finished to watch dunkirk)

Gomen, my fanged bud. My vote for this week is for Marco's story. His ending had it all, fantastic detail, great plot with suspense and humor, a surprise ending and an appearance from the band that we all love to torture!

Thanks for tipping the guys and your support! It means a lot for me and if this project grows i hope that you will be part of it (no stress, yo! 👊)

hi @f3nix

it's good to see that you're still very active on steemit :)

how is your contest doing so far?

upvoted, Piotr

Hi again @f3nix

Let me suggest something that may help your readers a lot. You should justify your posts.

The difference will be huge. Just like on picture below:
justify.png

You can find it explained quite well here:
https://steemit.com/html/@dyrits/steem-it-1-how-to-justify-your-text

Post is already a bit to old to upvote :(
Till the next time :)

Yours, Piotr

Hi Piotr! Thanks for passing and for your upvote/sustain. The contest has become like a little creativity lab. I like its sharing philosophy and with God's help I will eventually find a sponsor who will leave a fat upvote to the Wednesday weekly edition (because the post rewards are always distributed 100% to the partecipants, it's another way to sustain minnows). Your markdown advice was really helpful, I still have to improve a lot. You're always welcome here and when you want to play and laugh with us please do not hesitate! All the best.

hi @f3nix

Im sorry for such a late reply and Im glad to see that you're still active on steemit :)
I've been away for a couple of days and just got back. Loads of catching up to do and obviously checking if you're still around has been on my priority list.

I appreciate your comment. I also hope to find some fat sponsor with huge voting power :)

Cheers, Piotr

Don't worry Piotr, we all are thrown here and there by this hectic life. I wonder how I'm going to run the contest in summer as keeping up with the tight schedule is not easy.. I noticed that's very difficult to catch the attention of a whale, usually, they're lost in their own world of self-voting and circles. However I didn't really try in an organized way, due to my resistance to ask openly.. we'll see. You live in Malaysia? Is that for your job? All the best!

Hi @f3nix

you've been running your contest for quite some time already. how long did you plan to be involved in it?

Im not even trying to catch attention of any whale. It's waste of time.

I live in Malaysia because I felt in love with some local beauty and I also cannot stand winter so coming back to east europe wasnt on my mind :)

what about you?

Cheers,
Piotr

Hi @crypto.piotr,

I want to be consistent in the contest, as my main goal is to make it become a community and a fiction workshop. Indeed it's time absorbing, but with time my goal is that people will want to participate just for the satisfaction of creating good material together, rather than merely for trying to win an SBI share. Then, obviously, good content will take with itself votes, comments and awards.

About the whales: you're totally right. Indifference at every level. They can stay in their golden realms of self-voting / circle-jerking, with their powerful contest where the pot goes only to their friends and so on. I want crowdsourcing and distributed wealth, and will work to create it in my own way.

I understand you very well in your life choice as I found a beautiful Maltese, and she's my wife now and I lived in Malta for a period. What do you do there, if I may ask?