My Cat would gladly murder me

in #cat7 years ago (edited)

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My Cat would gladly murder me

By Nicholas Black


Do you ever get that sneaking suspicion that your cat would gladly murder and disembowel you at night while you sleep?

I have a bengal/Savannah mixed Cat and he is big, and a marginal psychopath. Out of every hour I spend with him I get about three minutes of cuddling, 50 minutes of full on attack-mode, and a curious seven minutes of plotting in calculating my demise.

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He pretends to like me, but I know that he would slit my throat and suck all the blood out of my dying body if he thought there be someone there to feed him four times a day (because he's a huge goddamn cat he eats all the time).

Anyone else feel like their cat is a potential murderer?

If you can relate, please RESTEEM this post. I don't even care if you upvote it... but let's get the word out about these furry little assassins.

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Cats might try and rule the world, as soon as they get over every other problem : Hoomans, Dogs, Water ... then they can rule us.
Or maybe they rule the world from the laps of their owners already who knows...

Indeed... i like the way you think. You're getting followed tout-suite

Yes I believe my friend cat is a murder lol I'm scared to sleep around him

They're creepy, right? You can see it in their beady little eyes.

No post has spoken more clearly to me lol

And no reply has spoken more clearly to me based on a post that has spoken more clearly to you:)

I like you lol

I'm a likable guy:)