A few years ago, when I was in a job hunt, I was fortunate enough to meet some of the most successful businessmen here in Albania. When I say successful, I mean people that are in top 10 richest Albanian list and not rich by Albanian standards, simply rich. The casual job meeting happened due to the nature of my father’s job, who, at that time, had a good position in a governmental institution.
I had just come back from my studies in Greece so I had no idea who I was meeting. When I told my friends whom I was having a coffee with, they would get excited and tell me that I was lucky and, for sure, I would get a job because this guy was powerful and rich and whatever.
The day arrived, the meeting happened and I was left with a bitter taste. That dude was arrogant, rude, overconfident and so full of himself. I already knew that even if he offered me a job, I would definitely not accept it. But, there is always a “but”, he was successful and powerful. And guess, what? He would not be where he is right now, being kind and nice to people. I met a few others, too. All they had in common was rudeness and overconfidence.
Was I mad because they didn’t offer me a job? Not at all. In contrary, it made me realize that I would never be able to put up with bosses bullshit.
There is a general perception that you become successful if you are a jerk. Not only they are jerks, but these people have some narcissistic traits which come as no big surprise. Narcissistic people have charisma, they like attention and they like being on a pedestal. We have already seen them in movies, one of the most famous being “Devils wear Prada”. Miranda Priestly, a powerful fashion magazine editor, in order to keep her influential position, made some moves that are morally questionable. In addition, we see her mistreating and torturing her personal assistant Andrea Sachs a recent graduate, whose personal life went down on a rollercoaster.
This was movie but if you want real example life:
Steve Jobs: A total jerk.
Mark Zuckerberg: Half jerk
Kanye West: A complete jerk
Donald Trump: The jerkiest of the jerk (I don't think he is so successful, but I couldn't miss the chance to add him to this list of jerks, whatever)
Travis Kalanick: An Asshole (http://www.businessinsider.com/uber-travis-kalanick-bio-2014-1)
Hate The Game, Not The Players
The quest for power has been existing as long as humans have been around. Nowadays, power means money. To see the jerks make it ahead in their professional aspect is not so new. As Niccolò Machiavelli wrote in his book “The Prince”
“Never attempt to win by force what can be won by deception.”
“A man who is used to acting in one way never changes; he must come to ruin when the times, in changing, no longer are in harmony with his ways.”
The Machiavellianism of successful people is not a big surprise, too. I am quite sure Niccolo would be very proud of the above-mentioned men. Jerks use all kind of strategies for them to get their way. In fact, they are the one who won’t stop at all to get what they want, even if that means breaking rules. Not only they are able to break rules, but they can also get away with it. When it comes to money games, nothing is personal. And the narcissistic jerks are better at it. Manipulation is easy for them and being goal-oriented they don't accept the vile nature of their behavior. They never stop until they reach the status that they want. When it comes to business success, honor and integrity don't help in increasing profit and gaining power.
Do I have less respect for Steve Jobs? Maybe yes, maybe not. But I am writing this post in a Mac Air and sometimes, I use my boyfriend’s iPhone to take some really good pictures. In the end of the day, these assholes left or are leaving a legacy behind and their products sell. They surely did something right. Although, I can’t say the same for Albanian assholes. They are assholes, that’s it.
I disagree with the thesis, but upvoted.
It pays to be good. Good writer in this case :-)
LOL thanks @gandalf :)
Intentionally, I tagged the post as "pseudoscience" ;)
You have nailed the correlation between narcisism and occupying higher positions in the hierarchy. There is ample evidence in psy literature which suggests so. Even sociopaths populate more the high levels comparing to the others. Why? Well because the jungle's law is still thriving within us and those who "break" the boundaries will always get the Lion's share. I am not suggesting we become intentional assholes here but living in a pink and fluffy world doesn't help either ;). Nevertheless I get the kind of asshole you are portraying in here. It is a sheep in disguise, corrupted people who need to have an armor and they end up being arrogant and rude. The typical small d** syndrome ;)
you nailed it too with ur comment ;) oh my god, i remember the small d* syndrome LMAO
I found a lot of psychology research related to this topic but i was too lazy to write about them, I will leave it to you since its your expertise ;) There is also another thing i didnt mention in my post: I am talking about jerks that are becoming rich and not vice versa. Where we live, people become assholes after they make a few bucks ;)
Cool post, so much truth in it! Sometimes I'm trying to be a jerk too, but I'm not that kind of person, unfortunately ;D
haha personally, I think I will never become rich because i cant be a jerk lol
That was a good (morning) read and a bit funny too. Not all rich and successful people are like this. But some of the older generation businessmen can tend to project this image. Probably because their bosses or mentors were like that! Although, some of the newer ones aren't rude and aggressive but calm yet assertive—which IMO is the better way to deal with 90% of the people who work for you. 10% are lazy and don't do shit and need a good shout in the ear!
Good morning :) Well the idea was a fun read :)
But there is a difference between a Jerk and a Jerk Off :) Very good points here though, thanks for the good reading.
I never talked about Jerk Off. the only thing you get is one arm bulkier than the other. Thanks.
I don't think that you need to be a jerk to be successful. Upvote anyway for this intersting article
thank you :)
the way i see it: if i am in an office with an asshole, i will quit. Guess who get the promotion? :)
Well, not the quitter :P
correct :)
I totally agree with your opinion on this. I've also met top people not at the same level as you have, but they were also jerks. Then, you have the other scenario when you met a successfull person and it turns out that the person is nice, kind and also funny. That makes you come down to earth and become less narcisist :)
Well my posts picked a few people. but it should not be taken into consideration for everybody :) of course, there are humble people and kind.
Dunno what to say..Miranda Priestly was awesome, Steve Jobs was just very demanding but I read a lot of heartwarming stories about him. And most successful people are actually quite generous and humble from my perception. I'm not even sure Mark Zuckerberg is such an asshole, but sure, if you judge him based on how he was in college...who wasn't an asshole back then?
the biography of Steve Jobs is not so nice. And Mark is making the donations to avoid taxes ;)
so what? you were never an asshole? I think it's easy to magnify the bad part and forget they are surrounded by good.
not defending mark but he still donated more than you will ever in 10 lives, if his reasons are..let's say, we don't know...unethical does it matter for those ppl helped by the money? Would they rather he not donate?
dont be mad with me lol. i am using a mac for god sake ;) this says enough