Sad to hear your story mate. And you are true about the wishes and prayers. Everything you want in your life you have to achieve on your own, as no one will give you nothing in this life. This i truly believe and hope i will be able to teach it my son. Hope you will get where ever you are planing to get.
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Do not be sad for me. I take full responsibility and I regret nothing. I wouldn't change an atom from its place to change my past. It happened. I know from experience that it will lead to something greater.
We just have to remind ourselves that from time to time, and sometimes others as well.