That is an intense story man, thanks for sharing something so personal. Do you ever explore drawing with double vision, it seems like it might start getting into the abstract but that could be really interesting.
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I was always drawn to portraiture because of the criticism. When your drawing someone, it will be viewed by all there family and friends. If you get the smallest detail wrong, they will notice and it will no longer resemble the subject. This really tunes your skills as an artist. I don't think I would find abstract as fulfilling.