Thank You For HATING My Art

In high school, I was already deeply passionate about art. The love for it started in Jr high. I was looking forward to sharpening my skills in high school.
While most students would hang out with their friends before, and after school.. I was drawing.
During lunchtime, most people sat with their friends and ate lunch… I was drawing.
I had a job, but after my 3 hours of janitorial work, I was drawing.

Sometimes I was worried I’d get sick, I’d pull an all nighter drawing, Wake up and go to school, Where I would continue to draw. It was this addiction that just consumed my world. But I just kept getting better and better! And I eventually found out, there were art shows I could participate in! I was so excited! I’m a very competitive person so I was planning to win!
I had already won second place for a ceramic house that I did! I am no good with clay, So that boosted my confidence through the roof. But now that I look back, I really just had good luck that time! I somehow managed to build a very nice house out of clay…

Stitch, A gothic school house from clay
By Lin Watchorn

I had my parents take me to the art museum to drop some art off… They were accepting high school students to show off in the lower floor, I was so excited, throughout my first years of high school I went on the field trip that involved us looking at the art, and I always wanted to see my art hanging up in there. I took my friends art with, because she had no transportation to get there. It was at least an hour drive. So 2 hours total to get there and back. I was told by my art teacher, that at least one person from every school would get accepted at the bare minimum. So either I or she would get accepted for sure! I was so excited. I submitted 2 pieces of art, She only submitted one.
I felt that my drawing was on point!

Brother and sister
By Lin Watchorn

And here was my mixed media piece that I submitted.

When you die
By Lin Watchorn

I remember finding out the news and being so horribly crushed.
They rejected my art, not even one piece of art... But BOTH! My parents had to drive me all the way back to pick up the “rejected” pieces, which were stored in the basement of the museum, Next to all the others rejected.
I was super upset,

My ceramics teacher explained to me that another artist going to school with me was also rejected his first time too, Which made me feel much better. Because I admired him as an artist.

I started looking forward to the next art show!
This one was a live one, we had 2 hours to create a piece of art for the judges. There were hundreds of visitors walking around watching you as you created. Sadly I had a bad flu and wasn’t feeling well. I painted completely from my imagination, while I noticed many other people copying photographs. At the end of the show, those people won. I got even angrier,

Why is it that creativity isn’t encouraged anymore? They are copying a photograph 100% exactly. Many people with basic art skills can do that!

I went home and prepared for the last show I’d be in for high school
I went to my drawing teacher, And demanded paper, He handed me a sheet of 22x30 inch paper.
“ Not big enough, Give me 3 more”
He looked at me shocked and gave me the extra paper.
I was determined to create a massive drawing, That people couldn’t ignore. It was going to take up a ton of space! It was going to be a painting either, It was going to be 4x4 Feet of nothing but PENCIL!
It wasn’t hard for me to come up with something to draw, All I have every time I sleep are horrific nightmares. I vividly remember them, And they are always bizarre. I decided to make a depiction of hell…
I didn’t have a fancy drawing desk, So I used the kitchen table, In the photo there are only 2 pages together, That is only half the drawing. It was really uncomfortable leaning over to draw for 8-12 hours a day. But I refused to give up.
Before I start to detail the meaning behind this drawing, I feel it’s important to mention, I am an Atheist. I have no control over my nightmares, So some of these themes may not make any sense.


I have never told a person what this drawing fully means, But here Steemit! You are about to find out…

This is the first page I did, This is ¼ of the drawing

I decided to draw Satan himself. As I saw him in a nightmare,

I had a nightmare about judgement day, I was ripped from a window of my workplace, (A science lab) And was told that I would be living on Saturn’s Hexagon. Other people got different planets, Or other areas of other planets. Depending on how good or bad you are as a person you’d get a specific planet. But I was never told how the system worked.

Satan is sitting in a tub of water which is leaking into the universe. The Saturn’s Hexagon in view.

This is the second section of my drawing which I titled “Saturn’s Hexagon”

This one has a lot of symbolism in it, The woman with skin over her mouth on the right was in a nightmare that I had. She couldn’t talk anymore.She lost her mouth. She was trapped in a forest nude along with other woman who lost their ability to talk. They were also trapped in a place I would also consider “hell”.
The blind shark came from another nightmare that I had where I was in the middle of the ocean being chased by this blind shark. He tried to eat me, But I threw myself into a clear tunnel. To avoid being devoured!
The triangular doorway on the left is a touch of science that I felt was necessary. Which relates to Space time.
The Triangular doorway on the right is an angel. She is heading up to heaven, which is the large building in the cross in the sky. This drawing somewhat relates to the Christian view while I twisted and turned it in a bizarre way. I was raised LDS but I am currently Atheist (More In another post).
I found it funny that I added the small stairway in the top right corner, It’s made of boxes. With tiny flowers embedded on them. I got a job at a shipping company a year or so later.
I added an Doric column, Because I felt it would look cool, As well as bring emphasis to the skin faced woman. Doric columns are associated with strength. My skin faced woman is blocked in, Shes trapped. The strength of the trap of hell is enormous. And she cannot seem to escape it.
You can start to see an arm in the side of the page, It is split revealing eyes. This represents a past unhealthy addiction I had, (Cutting). When this drawing was created, I still had that addiction. An awful one, That is why I felt it deserved to “go to hell”. The eyes poking out, Represents the fact that I tried to keep my addiction secret, But hiding something like that is difficult, And I failed to hide it.

The third section of my Saturn’s Hexagon Drawing

This part is located at the top Left of the drawing. Your eyes may fall on the woman and the monsters face. The woman in the top Left corner was a thief in her lifetime, She was also sent to hell. She has become numb after witnessing such terrible stuff in her time there.
The eye balls float around, Because you can’t hide from anything in hell, You are always being watched, And they at all times know what you are doing. The monster has come to the city to destroy it. The villagers tried to restrain one of this arms to his head, Forming a triangle shape on the drawing. Behind the poles you see a stained glass window. The villagers live in building among buildings. The more evil you are, the bigger you are. So you can successfully torment others. So if you are going to hell, It’s advised to be evil as possible because you have more powers that way. This gives the Monster a massive advantage on devouring and torturing the lesser evil people trapped in the little city. He only has one regular arm, The other one got stretched out and ruined. That is why it’s very long and snake like. He struggles to use it.

The last and final area of the drawing

The small village, and a long stair case to Heaven (Yes I referred to that song) hahah. But unfortunately even though It looks like a simple pathway, It’s extremely far away, Most people are too exhausted to work towards it.

The completed piece

"Saturn's Hexagon" Pencil on paper 4x4 Feet

I submitted this drawing into the show.

I was really feeling confident. Many people I went to school with were in awe by it! They watched me create it and were in shock when they saw the massive thing completed. It took a lot of work to find a frame, But I eventually did. They hung it up at the show. I also submitted some other art work.

Giraffe Man
By Lin Watchorn

This mixed media art was 22x30 inches in size, So about poster sized!

The family of four
By Lin Watchorn

This drawing was 30x22 Inches,
The blue you see is in Ballpoint pen.

Hahah, As you may of already guessed, I came for the awards ceremony, and got… Nothing! Not even an honorable mention. My art teachers were actually really angry this time, The girl who beat me with the pencil drawings, Drew a portrait. While the portrait was really good, It didn’t take any massive amount of creativity.
My art teacher could see that I was upset. That’s when She told me that creativity isn’t always rewarded, And that the people living in Utah, Who are mostly Mormon, Probably didn’t appreciate my creepy art style. While I felt sorry for myself for a while, It lit a fire in me for art even more. Instead of winning art shows, I focused on improvement and development in my skills, I became more passionate. Now I’m 23 years old, And I’m grateful that people didn’t like my art, Imagine if I would of won those shows, Maybe I would of gotten bored of the struggle to improve, Maybe I wouldn’t be doing art right now!
Many artists I went to school with, No longer do art. Many other artists who won many shows, Are in different careers or have different majors. They may have gotten bored of art, feeling they have “mastered” it. And moved on. I felt like that before I participated. I felt like I knew everything about art, And that I was the “best”. I quickly learned that being the best in art isn’t possible. Everyone likes different styles, And you can never cater to everyones tastes.
Here is a conversation I had with my ceramics teacher, (My favorite teacher ever)
Teacher: Kaylin I can tell you are bummed about the results.
Me: Well yeah I work so hard, and people seem to hate my art.
Teacher: Congratulations! People hating you is a good thing!
Me: Uhh WHY?
Teacher: Because when you have people hate you, That means you have the same amount of people who like you. Go find those people!

I didn’t fully understand what this even meant. But as I began reading and studying on my own, I stumbled across something that James Altucher wrote, Here is part of the post.

“She said was that for every creative thing you do: 1/3 will love you, 1/3 will hate you, and 1/3 won’t care.”

That conversation was something I kept in the back of my head for years, But when I read what James Altucher said, I realized that she was completely right.

I’ve always wanted to quit art, I was always a failed artist. But sadly, I won’t be able to quit creating until the day I die, Because I’m in love with drawing. –Lin Watchorn

11 years later, I am still drawing. And I have been rewarded for it tremendously. I’m facing the massive possibility of freedom and self employment because of my hard work! I’ve published over 40 books, And lets be honest, They don’t have perfect 5 star reviews. But hey! I’m trying and I get better everyday. I won’t give up. Sometimes people hating you, Is a beautiful gift because it motivates you more than anything.
That is why when you don’t get what you want exactly, Always look for that silver lining. Figure out what you can learn from the experience. Winning is fun, And a great experience. But sometimes you just don’t win. And that’s okay!

I don’t care if I’m “good” at art! If I am the best in the world or the worst in the world. It doesn’t matter, As long as I enjoy it. I will keep going. –Lin Watchorn

James Altucher’s blog post “How To Deal With Haters”