For one week I got to feel not like a suck person. I felt abled. No dis. Preparing, I had a reason to push through illness, I had something to work for, I had a world to save, I had a part to play, Justice was called for, and I had a loud voice (thanks alcohol!) so I yelled, to my own strength, to my own determination, for my own hand crafted medicine.
My preparation for the competition this week stepped my game the fuck up. My Poi spinning became more fluid, I mastered handless headstands, I made my own shoes, I customized costumes. I was empowered by dance, by art, by passion. I felt something that wasn’t pain, a rare occurrence for people like me. I was a girl who just wanted to dance.
I showed up to The World Famous Golden Banana, ready to compete, but mostly, and more importantly, happy to be there. The staff was a group of generous, fair GENTLEMEN, who post competition got me shit faced and sheep dogged me to a safe couch to sleep on and crossed 0% of my boundaries.
A beautiful disaster, I got sloppy drunk pre competition, a pro sex worker advocate, I was everyone’s loudest cheerleader, an entertainer, I laughed non stop, mostly at the jokes I was cracking. It was a challenge getting there, I displayed nothing but confidence even as I was fucking up, but, most importantly, I competed for the first time, and kept a promise to myself, because I’ll be damned if I’m the one breaking my heart ever again.
I lost a lot of strength, the ripple of a disease diagnosed but untreated and currently out of control, but I have hope now, the most powerful antidote. And I will compete again, and again, and again, because this, this right here, this is what I live for. This is what I die for. This is what my life is worth.
All in all I can say I’ve always had a good experience at The Golden Banana, and recommend it as a place to work for entertainment artists. They are nice and fair to their entertainers, it is a place of encouragement and growth. Go there!
Mic check! I’m Dahlia Noir, and I’m here TO FIGHT, FOR YOUR RIGHT, TO PAAAAAAAARTAYYYY!
