I so know what you mean that dichotomy of existence can really hit you sometimes. I even feel sometimes like what appear as outside sources (our current storms that have knocked us out of power and even broken generator so I was stripped to the core of a cold being shivering in a drafty house) is a sort of wake up to from your own subconscious making your 'reality' vastly stripped down so you can see the core of where you are and ask yourself: Is this the right place the right path? Do I need to follow and listen more to the other side of me that usually does not steer me wrong?

It's funny, too, because art is always there for me to lead me back into the correct path.