BEASTLY TALES

THE HOTEL INSPECTOR

It was during this type of event,
When a Hotel Inspector was secretly sent.
Incognito, he checked in on the eve,
Of such an event, he did perceive.
The hotel kitchen was all a-clamour.
The chef and the waiters their instructions did stammer,
The leading Rotarian and his wife,
Hoped for a meal free from strife.
Major and Mrs Bollocks were also there,
Sitting right down with extra care.
They had ordered during the cocktail hour,
And now sat expectantly awaiting their chow.
The Hotel Inspector was sat at a table,
And was busily reading a wine bottle label,
When, all of a sudden, there was a loud thump!
Some hastened to the kitchen, and there saw a lump.
Yes, the Chef was out cold, on the floor,
His head resting against the refrigerator door.

There, obviously, was something just not right,
What could it be on such an important night.
The permeating smell of strong drink gave a clue.
The Chef had imbibed more than his due.
So what was to be done to fulfil dinner orders?
For special guests and regular boarders.
Harry Bugbed said, “Let us not panic,”
“We can change the menu to something Hispanic.”
“There’s a Spanish restaurant just down the road,”
“I’ll bring food from there, “a la mode”.
“The Spanish mode, that is to say.”
“We must move quickly, to save the day.”

Now the Hotel Inspector thought it a winner,
That there had been a change in dinner,
What he wasn’t aware of was that
The restaurant “La Boca de Raton” was at,
A location in proximity to a sewerage farm.
A fact that for the Hotel Inspector could cause alarm.
Many flies had entered the Spanish restaurants kitchen,
The Chef, in fact, had all day been bitching,
About the lack of any window screen.
The Paella, by many flies had been seen,
Each would regurgitate and rub legs on the food,
And undoubtedly did other things considered rude.
In consequence, that very day,
Patrons rushed to the bathrooms to gasp Olay!
The Hotel Inspector, not aware of the flies
Did now the Hotel kitchen criticize,
The cleanliness standard is clearly below par.
I’ll issue a Closure Notice on restaurant and bar,
So that, to Harry Bugbed, is just what he finally did.
While Harry, of the Inspector, was rid,
He still had to explain to his diners that night
Just why their stomachs had received such a fright!