This is a topic very near and dear to my heart: the affect of the state on using young men and women to further it's violent objectives abroad.
As a 17 year, seven time combat veteran, I often envy those who can view the world in black and white. To see our state as the good and others' as evil. What a simplistic view. If only it were so simple.
This song really speaks to me:
There are days I wish I could return my mind to the delusions of a simple world. To find a sort of inner piece before "leav[ing] this world behind." Sometimes it is imagined in a self-inflicted, untimely end. Sometimes with a bullet. Other times with a massive intravenous overdose of opiates.
On the one side, is the damage that comes from incoming fire. I've weathered everything from an Ak-47 round to an incoming ballistic missile (Scud-B) to even having been targeted by Surface-To-Air missiles. Let's not forget the daily pounding of mortars or shoulder fired rockets. I can't stand sudden, loud noises. They put my nerves on edge.
On the other side, is the large-scale loss of family's loved ones. I recall when I was with the 101st ABN DIV when SGT Akbar tossed a grenade into a tent, killing several service members. It was a shock to lose individuals you knew of but didn't really know personally. It's even more shocking when you DO know them.
I'll never be able to shake from my head the second rotation the 101st made into Iraq. One of my good friends, who married just months before, lost his wife to a mortar. It took out a generator she was standing by. She was a sweet, pretty, YOUNG kid. If not for Petty George, they might have otherwise known a wonderful life together. So many hopes and dreams crushed in an instant.
Even though I was not there (I had recently PCS'd to Korea), I felt the shock waves of that traumatic event. I still feel them now. These are things you never let go of. They are seared into the mind until the body takes its first step into dust.
You never forget.
You try to forget.
You never forget.
Sometimes it takes a black market opiate to give you a moment's peace. For three years I tried to extend that peace. For seven months I've been sober.
It doesn't matter if you physically die in war. War kills you either way.
I'm going to revisit this song another day with a video of my own and really speak to just what it is we are doing to our kids. Stay tuned.
This is is a very powerful post. First, thanks for being willing to risk yourself in support of a cause you believed to be worthy, sorry it didn't turn out to be what you thought it was.
I agree with you, the only way to stop paying this price is to stop feeding the machine. We have to starve it. We cannot continue to foment hatred against other peoples in far away places and expect the violence to die. If you want your fire to go out, you have to stop feeding fuel into it.
On a side note, many complain about the expense of our government, and this is one place that we spend an inordinate amount of resources for what it gains us in "security" a nebulous term that isn't really measurable, since if you are secure, you are dealing in the "what ifs" what if we didn't do this? And if you are not, you can never know if more war would have prevented it.
I think the costs, both human and financial are too high, not to mention the irreperable harm done in other worlds across our globe.
It's a cause I no longer believe in. Unfortunately my anarchist principles came along after signing that final contract...
Thanks for your input!
Sure. I feel pretty strongly about this having several children in the prime age for recruitment. None of mine are inclined toward military service, and I'm glad. Like you, my ideas about it have changed through the years. Good luck with your recovery.
Thanks! And no doubt. I could only imagine having kids that age.
It's not without irony that I joined the Army after having been an addict for six years and homeless for as many months. Luckily, since I've been there before, I had the wherewithal to straighten up this time.