"Wear this yes, Ta! Later that night, I'm picking up. It was about 7 o'clock. "My mouth opened slightly as she handed me a gift that I did not know about. Maybe if I could see myself, I was like a stupid person standing with a slightly open mouth.
"What are you doing, Fa?" My question should not be like that. I should have asked, "What is it, Fa?" But it does not make sense to ask me that question, because without asking any questions, I can see the contents of the parcel later. Finally, I do not regret asking the question, "What are you doing, Fa?"
"Look at it later, Ta. I'm so impatient! "He looks very excited. I have never seen him so happy. I was just smiling.
My name is Aleta, just call Tata. And the young man who gave me the gift was Alfa, someone who always adorned my most beautiful and worst day. It has been a while since Alfa's attitude has changed slightly. He is usually always on standby to deliver me work also pick up on time. But now he just picks me up after work, and I have to wait a long time. He who always calls me before sleeping, now my phone is quiet there is no call, until it becomes cold. He who usually always take the time to walk with me while I'm on holiday, now my holiday is just filled with lying on the mattress or just watching tv. Very unhelpful!
But since the incident-when Alfa gave me my allegations about Alfa's attitude that changed as if it were gone!
After I got home, I hurriedly opened the parcel from him. Make sure what he gives. It turned out that there was a sleeveless tosca green dress. One small ribbon adorned the left waist of the dress. In the chest of the dress, there are accents that make the brukat dress become elegant but did not leave the impression simplenya. Not forgetting, the gift giver accompany matching shoes with dress gifts.
Alfa want to do, anyway, tonight?
My mind started wandering around. Imagine what will happen in the night. My chest beat faster than usual. This is the first time Alfa has asked me out after I've been friends with her for so long. Yes, we've been friends, maybe one level of status that is a little high again, that is friends, not just friends. But to be honest, I wanted more from that friendly status. I do not know what the status is, you may understand.
We first met when our parents-exactly Mother-passed in a shopping center. At that time, Alfa and I were nine years old.
Uh, you remember what I said? Dating?
The sun has been done with the task since 2 hours ago. Tonight, seven minutes past seven, I've been perfect. My body was covered with Alfa's dress this afternoon. My face has been polished in such a way but not too menor. Do not forget I wear matching shoes with the dress I wear, which is also a gift from Alfa. Suddenly my ears caught the sound of car horns from outside. Oh, it's 7 o'clock right!
"Why are you inviting me here, Fa?"
Tonight I was invited Alfa to Five Star Restaurant in Jakarta. I do not know what for. Honestly, I admit tonight Alfa looks very handsome from the usual-who is already handsome-by wearing a black suit and new hair that is crew.
"Bentar, Ta. Maybe again stuck in traffic. "Alpha's answer did not connect.
"What are you looking at, huh, Fa? Wait someone? "I asked confused after seeing Alfa who had been looking at the restaurant door, looks like waiting for someone.
"You will know, Ta." Alfa smiled reassuringly. Ah, Alfa! Why should a smile like that, anyway?
I keep thinking about who Alfa is waiting for. My heart guesses if I will be given a surprise tonight. It could be, did not Alfa invite her parents to eat together tonight? It could be, is not Alfa waiting for someone who delivered a diamond ring to give me tonight? Or, maybe, Alfa will ask me in front of her parents tonight? Maybe that's what he said 'again stuck jammed' it for his parents. My brain kept wondering along with my incredibly fast heart. My hands are cold. Can not wait to see what surprise Alfa will give. However, I must keep my heart so as not to bounce higher than this.
"Hi! Lusi! "Alfa waved a hand to a woman entering the restaurant. My prediction is wrong! I lost! My heart expectation is weak! Not Alfa's parents who came and eagerly awaited Alpha. Not an introduction to the diamond ring eagerly awaited by Alpha. Not a surprise proposal like what I've been waiting for. But, a woman who is too captivating. The woman is really graceful with her black dress, one color with a suit that Alfa is wearing. She smiled sweetly as she approached me and Alfa.
"Hi, Alfa." The woman kissed Alfa's right cheek. Of course my breath hunted, burned jealous fire. I'm the only one who has been friendly with Alfa has not kissed his cheek. Who is she, kissing Alfa's cheek haphazardly ?!
"Kenalin, Ta, this is Lusi." As if hearing my heart, Alfa said with a happy smile. Introduce the blond woman to me. Actually I already know what the woman's name is, because Alfa had called her name before; Lusi.
"Lusi." He smiled as he shook my hand, forced to kiss his hand while saying, "Aleta." I smiled forcefully.
"Ta, this Lusi, my fiancé."
Fiance.
My heart seemed to stop beating right then and there. After three syllables from the ten syllables that came out of Alfa's mouth. I feel laughed at the universe. And I cursed my brain that had been frozen, did not respond to the throb of my heart. Cursing my unresolved brain will argue my heart. Cursed my brain who wanted to be my heart's henchmen. Really, I say heart, your argument is too dramatic!
I (pretended) smiled happily to hear it. Exactly when Alfa gave me a dress last afternoon. My heart continued to rebel to stop the deceitful smile, to be immediately replaced with a tear river. But, I already hate this word of my heart. The argument is too high for me to follow. So I said, "Wow! Congratulations, Fa. Finally it could be, "he chuckled.
Alfa smiled, "Thanks, Ta."
Lusi also smiled. His smile, just like Alfa. Soothing.
"Fa, I'm rich I can not stay long, deh. Mom waited for her, asked to be accompanied to my aunt's house, "I'm just going out. My mother could not be this night to my aunt's house. Which is probably, the mother had fallen asleep because it was too tired to keep the bakery from morning until late afternoon.
Alfa immediately believed, also did not hesitate to say, "Oh, yes already. Be careful, Ta. "
Without further ado, I immediately came out of the restaurant that was really tight air. My tears can not be caught out. Always like this. My heart always wins to control. My tears are getting heavier out with the rain that is also a participant. The streets are deserted. Only one or two vehicles passed by. The aerial restaurant was far from the street where I was standing. Different from what I expected, Alfa did not pursue. Alfa did not come umbrella me that was falling rain. Hugged me who was cold. Whispered a soothing sentence that it was all a joke. But here there are only me, the streets, the trees, and the rain. I screamed loudly. My shout seemed to be muffled by the increasing sound of the rain. This time, I am very grateful to the heavens who are willing to join in grief. For the umpteenth time my heart's expectations were wrong. And maybe it will go wrong wrong. Afterwards, everything is dark.
My breath is hunting. The dream that just came to me like reality. Very grateful it was just a dream. It's impossible for Alfa to have a fiancee. He never told me that he was close to a woman. And as far as I know, Alfa is rarely friends with women, except me. In the midst of the sunshine entering my room through this unauthorized window, I can only hope; The dream will not-and never will-be true. But, that hope was gone again, when Alfa this afternoon gave the dress exactly as Alfa gave in my dream last night. Afterwards, my dreams last night seemed to be pasted. Dreams are reality. And for the umpteenth time, until I'm tired of saying; My heart's expectations are wrong.
You can chain me, you can torture me, you can even destroy this body, but you will never imprison my mind.
- Mahatma Gandhi