I missed it...there's no excuses and I'll own my error; that's what ownership means...although I'd like to blame it on Guy Fawkes.
I'm talking about missing the birthday of someone who means a great deal to me and I was mortified. But wait...I'm not telling the whole story...here's some perspective which may go some way to mitigate the degree of my nutbaggery.
I don't put any importance on my own birthday and do not expect others to do so either. I emerged from a birthing canal on a particular day, slipped juicily into the world and started crying because some bastard-doctor smacked me (I'm still searching for him with the idea of administering a healthy dose of payback) and that's that; hardly cause for celebration on my part or anyone else's - it's just not something I'm interested in...but I like other people's birthdays and like to acknowledge birthdays for the people close to me and who matter to me.
Back when I met this person and found out her birth date I, because I'm not very good at remembering birthdays, needed a way to remember it and I came up with a brilliant plan...It's on 5th November, the day Guy Fawkes tried to blow up the House of Lords, with the Lords and the King of England in it, back in 1605; not something I'd forget considering my love of history and just like Guy Fawkes and his fellow-conspirators I thought my cunning plan was...well, super cunning.
But here's the thing...her birthday isn't on 5th November at all, it's on the 4th, and my cunning plan came to a rather ignominious and abrupt conclusion utter failure.
A brief historical interlude for your reading pleasure
This is the actual lantern Guy Fawkes was carrying when he was discovered in the undercroft beneath the House of Lords where he and his co-conspirators had packed thirty six barrels of gunpowder they intended to ignite which would cause the demise of the building and bury the Lords and the king under the rubble. There was also planned uprising arranged to follow the destruction, all part of a plan by the English Catholics to end decades of persecution by the Protestant Church of England. (Yep, fucken religion, yet again).
The authorities were tipped off though and Guy Fawkes was captured as he guarded the gunpowder down in the undercroft and prior to setting it off; the others were captured and killed elsewhere. I took the photo of this lantern at the Ashmolean Museum, In Oxford, UK and thought I'd add it into this post as historical value.
There's a cool Netflix miniseries called Gunpowder, starring Kit Harington (Jon Snow, of Game of Thrones fame), and most interestingly, Kit Harington is a descendant of Robert Catesby, one of the main conspirators of the plot, actually dubbed the Gunpowder Plot. That's cool right?
And now after that historical interlude, it's back to the present.
On the day of the 4th November I received a message from the birthday girl who mentioned her birthday and I was like...fucking fuckety fuckistic fuckballs...I fucked up the days.
I told her I had thought it was the following day, the 5th, and why I remembered it (so cunningly) that way and that I felt terribly bad I'd actually messed it all up. She was understanding, mainly due to the fact she's not really all that into her own birthday anyway, which was some consolation of course, but I still felt/feel bad about it.
The birthday girl has forgiven me and I've adjusted the birthday calendar I keep in my mind...I really should write these fucken things down I guess, and no real harm was done...not like with Guy Fawkes, Robert Catesby and their compatriots...their lives ended badly after being caught at their caper...google it if you like. But in my case there was no real damage done, except maybe to my pride.
Have you ever missed or forgotten someone's birthday?
I can't believe I'm the only one to have done so or the only one to (almost) blame someone whose been dead for over four hundred years for it! If you'd like to tell me about it go ahead, or maybe someone forgot your birthday? How did it make you feel and why? Do you put much effort into your own birthday, do you like the day or loathe it? Explain why if you'd like to, I'll respond.
Design and create your ideal life, tomorrow isn't promised - galenkp
[Original and AI free]
Image(s) in this post are my own.
I'm sure I've forgotten something more than once, but the first and maybe more horrible (to me) time was when I was a very young woman. My husband's family was in (semi) crisis over something his younger sister had gotten into and I was the only woman available to go talk with her, which I dutifully did. Afterwards, I found that I had totally missed my older sister's FIRST baby shower, that I mistakenly thought was the next day. It was a big deal! This was before cell phones, so nobody could call or text me once I was out of the house to say "where are you???". I was SO devastated and when I called my sister to apologize, I cried and cried ! I could not believe I had done that ! It made me feel weepy now just to type that ! LOL ...geezzz
It's unfortunate that we are all only human afterall. ha ha.... sigh
Hmm, that's not good. I mean it's not like you get another chance at that the following year. It seems like you've still not gotten over it too, I'm sorry.
I think we need to find a little kindness for ourselves, we are only human as you say, and so are fallible.
Nope ! No 2nd chances on that. I haven't thought about it in a very long time, but it did seem to step forward when I thought on things I had forgotten that were important.
I generally let myself get away with a lot, too much sometimes I think. Most things aren't that important though.
Don't sweat the small stuff is a phrase I agree with, but sometimes we need to find a little room to accept that we're human and fuck up the big stuff sometimes. I've missed some big things too, not through forgetting, through not being around when they happened, I regret it but have to move on. You know?
Yep ! I know !
Can't carry around forever the things that happened that you can't change, that is for sure.
I hate my birthday, I don’t like to celebrate it, or that my close circle pays too much attention to the date getting closer and as I’ve grown up I like it less, it’s a day like any other but people keep insisting on celebrating it
I’m terrible with birthdays and especially with anniversaries, before smartphones, I always tried to write them down somewhere, but I always forgot where I had them written down, there were birthdays that I remembered weeks later, not days like you,weeks. Luckily smartphones help a lot with that, Google Calendar and the problem was over, now I’m one of the first to congratulate the person in question, definitely a life saver :)
I liked the historical passage, I was not familiar with the history, i will read a bitt about it later
It seems like a weird day to celebrate right?
I have people around me who want to make a big deal of it and have tried to do so in the past. I'll tolerate, but not like, it. I also don't like the expectation people put on it when they gift me...I've had people get annoyed when I haven't returned a gift to them on their own birthday because I often don't give a shit about birthday's you know? I'm like ok, it's about gifts huh? What about the gift of friendship?
The day I start putting people's birthdays into google calendar is the day I'll chew my own face off after spreading it with peanut butter.
Read up on the Gunpowder Plot, it's interesting stuff...at least for a history buff like me.
I don't think birthdays should be celebrated. Actually, it should be the mother who should be celebrated (she's the one who did all the hard work, went through a thousand things, and delivered a child). So, without a doubt, it should be the mother who should be celebrated, not the child 😅 I prefer doing it that way, it gets me more excited.
I understand everything you're saying, I feel the same way. If you want to celebrate someone or give them a gift, I don't think you have to wait for the day they were born. It can be any time.
It's a good story, the Gunpowder Plot, of people having conviction and believing in something. What the King and his cronies were doing was wrong and they wanted to right that wrong...gave their lives for it. I'm not into religion and feel a great deal of harm has come from it/because of it, but I stand for those who cannot stand for themselves and admire others who do also.
Yes, I've seen the miniseries and liked it. It will be better if watched with some understanding of the real-life plot. Also, V for Vendetta. Great movie, also based around the Gunpowder Plot story, just modernised. I might watch it this weekend now you brought it up.
Lastly, on the celebrate the mum aspect of birthdays. I agree completely.
I'll be watching the miniseries soon, and now that I've read and talked a bit, I understand it a little better.
I feel like an influencer! 😎😂
Lol, #dahinfluencer
Greetings galenkp I like your sense of humor to be very honest we are all forgetful especially all men but a woman who reminds you of her birthday is because she loves and appreciates you very much one way I do to remember is by setting the important dates on the phone of family and close friends.
Setting reminders in the phone is a good way to remember, I do it for most things but never seem to remember to put birthdays in. Maybe I need to put a a reminder into my phone to remind me to put a reminder in for birthdays.
Apart from my family's birthdays, I frequently add my friends' birthdays on the google calendar. I even have a widget of the app so I can see the upcoming events.
I don't really care about my own birthday. Mine is usually during the summer vacation so I just spent it with family. From what I've heard and seen, men tend to care less about their birthdays as a whole. The most common thing I've done on my birthdays is to have the day off. I don't want to work during my birthday, and that's the biggest treat I gave myself.
Google is a popular choice but I tend not to use it much.
I think you're right about men (generally) caring less about their birthdays, certainly as they get older also. I like celebrating people's birthdays, just not my own, and another thing that drives me bonkers and not in a good way is that bloody happy birthday song. I can't stand it. Maybe I'm the birthday grump.
My birthday was on the 6th, I didn't even remember, it was just like any other day to me. Then, as soon as the clock hit 12 AM, my wife called, I wondered why she was calling. And then came the little birthday wish, she was the first one to wish me a happy birthday. Even my Hive birthday was this month, on 2nd November.
Lol, you sound like me...I said the same back when it was my birthday this year, just like any other day; life went on without a massive (and dumb) birthday celebration, I assume yours has too.
It was just like that. In fact, I was focusing more on work that day. 😂
The only different thing was that we had pizza, then everyone in the family got together for a bite.
I try to associate certain more special events so that I don't forget my card pins. Birthdays I don't even try to remember because I know I will forget them. I remember two or three, including my own but the rest, the days of close friends, I don't remember. I rely on the memory of others... I don't consider these dates so important. A true friend doesn't mind if you forget to congratulate him, of course, just a true friend!
I remember a rather embarrassing incident almost 40 years ago when someone from school came to register my son and asked me what year he was born. I didn't know. It was horrible for me.
It was unusual to associate your girlfriend's birthday with the day Guy Fawkes tried to blow up the House of Lords (-1). I, if I were you, would have forgotten who I made that association for in the first place.
The best solution is, I think, to write down in a notebook some of the important dates for you... and don't lose it!
I agree with you, a true friend would excuse a lapse, a forgotten birthday, and I'd feel a little annoyed if someone was to hold me to task over it. I remember the birthdays that I need to and this case I didn't forget, I just remembered the date incorrectly. A subtle difference maybe, but different nonetheless.
Not my girlfriend but yes, maybe unusual. I thought it was on that day though, and as a history buff it's a day I'm familiar with and knew I'd remember the birthday when it came around. The problem was I got the wrong day. Lol.
It certainly makes a difference, @galenkp! I apologize that my reply already comes on top of the replies you get from your next post.
I thought it might be but I didn't know how to spell it, I just wanted to write a friend but let it be understood that I'm referring to a female (girl).
There is a problem here with my knowledge of English and I had a lot of problems understanding but also expressing myself in relation to word "friend". In Romanian, there are separate words for a male friend and a female friend, and in English only one for both genders (if I am not mistaken). When I read... I went out with a friend for a walk... I don't know if it was a woman or a man unless it is understood in context if the narrative pre-codes that somewhere.
It must be difficult to interact with an English speaker like me but you do a good job so no worries at all.
I also write in such a way that I don't give too much information about who, what, when and how as it's the internet and one needs to be careful. People will often make it up for themselves but I try to be a little vague at times.
Thank you, I'm glad to hear that.
I think most people who write here are talking about themselves, their lives and passions, and their problems. It's easy to see that some are very vague, some even hidebound, and others choose to go deeper into exposing their lives, habits, desires, and dreams.
How is it better? The second category is to my liking, even if it is perhaps more dangerous for them. I think some assume and others don't realize the danger.
I had a busy day and forgot that today is Friday, the day you provide inspiration for posts. I'm running off to see, I'm curious. I hope this weekend will be to your liking!
Forgot Friday?
Cum ai putut să faci asta!
Lol.
Haha... perfectly said!
For me it is terrible if I forget a birthday, in fact I have written down all birthdays in my phone calendar, even those of my former students!
Once the graphologist I studied with told me: if you have your birthdays written down like that, it's because you care about them remembering yours, and it's true.
If I forgot a birthday, I felt a mistake, I apologised and made a personalised card for that person with my own hands.
And if they have forgotten mine, although in my close circle it is difficult for that to happen because I remember it days in advance.🤣 I love to celebrate, even if it's simple!
You make cards with your hands for birthdays? Hmm, I think I'd like one.
My birthday is on January 33rd, it can be an elusive date, but if you manage to find it then feel free to make a card for me, I'll cherish it. 😉
Yes, I have made handmade and also digital cards, according to the person's taste .... January 33rd, I'll look it up in my personal calendar... there must be that number... I died laughing!🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
It's a very special day, but not easy to find.
I know .... won't be March 3rd?.... hahahaha no way, when is your birthday?
It may be as in your assumption, a harder assumption to make than I did... on the simplest one, i.e. February, 2. Perhaps that may be a child's logic but often things can be simpler than we think. Maybe, eventually, @galenkp will make a contest out of guessing his birthday and maybe give us more clues... i.e. place of birth, haha!
It would be great if you could make a contest, if it's true that sometimes things are simpler than they seem... I'll schedule the 2nd of february just in case...😂
Lol...nah it's not February 2...or March 3 either. That only leaves 363 days...unless it's on a leap year on February 29th! Hmm, I wonder. 🙄🤔
Well well, when it comes to birthdays, these are special occasions and I only celebrate birthdays of special people in my life.
There are only few special ones for me and it is easy to remember their birthdays and for them it is easy to remember mine.
And yes, in case you want to remember my birthday, it is 7th of December 😉
7th December huh? Well don't hold your breath on me remembering, it's highly unlikely. It's good you remember the important birthdays though, well done.
Yeah. But I can remember yours if you will tell😉
January 33rd.
Lol
Mate, you are something really interesting 😂
I couldn't make any reference to that this year. I guess I did not think in English at all on that day. It's sad how being busy steals from your mind. I hope it ads enough to compensate.
Then again, remembering the essence of a date's meaning, even at another time, seems to be more important.
Hey mate, good to see you around, I hope things have been good for you in your world.
You're right about being busy, I guess distracted is another way to put it, as there's so many things going on in a person's life (with mine at least) that things that may seem as less important can fall by the wayside. I work towards not letting it happen, but ultimately things slip through the cracks.
I started adding birthdays to my Google calendar to help avoid things like that. It really helps, so yes, I have clearly forgotten important birthdays before. The most notable one would be my mom's.
Forgetting your mom's birthday...I'd say that's one of the most important to remember. Lol.
I hope your new system is working.
Haven't missed another one yet!
Ninja-level birthday remembering.
Belated happy birthday to your friend who means a great deal to you. Im not big on birthdays too. I havent actually celebrated my birthday, except when i was 16 where my friends and i hang out. Anyway, maybe you can add her birthday in your phone calendar so you will be reminded next Nov 4. Have a great day☺️
I wonder why you don't like your birthday, or don't celebrate it? Most people get right into it.
I don't know. On my birthday, i just want to chill and have some me time to reflect on what my year has been. I dont want to stress myself preparing a gathering for my family and friends. Although i appreciate people who remember my birthday.
I thought it would be something like this. I'm the same and hate a fuss bing made.
What an instructive post. Coincidentally I was just thinking about that today, how I always forget birthdays. I'm not proud of this at all, you see. 😞
Well, I certainly don't mind you forgetting mine, not that you know it of course...but if you did, just forget it. :)
FYI, my birthday is on January the 33rd.
😅 what a beautiful day! it is unique.
It's not easy to remember...usually slips past unnoticed. I'm ok with it.
Those of my family I can remember. Sometimes I don't even know the day I'm living, that's why I can forget some of them... hahaha. I need a decent app to remind me of them. When I had Facebook it was easy. But I got off that crap a long time ago.
Well then, if you ever find yourself on January the 33rd call me up to wish me happy birthday.
🤣
I am so bad with dates that I just completely give up trying to remember them!
Except for my wife's birthday and those anniversaries of course 😅
Other than that, most of those other "important" dates are saved in my calendar so that I don't mess up 😖
I'm pretty good with dates usually, I've got a good memory, but it's the birthday thing that gets in the way because I don't put a lot of importance on my own; I guess I block it out to some degree, generally.
Most people don't make a fuss about it including the person whose birthday it was as mentioned in this post and sometimes I wonder if they're just doing that to be nice. Either way, it's not caused me too many issues over the years.
It's good to hear you remember the important dates. ✅
Well I don't think most will actually make a fuss over not remembering the day, or at least I haven't came across any of my friends that "disown" me for not remembering their birthday 😅
Some people are nutbags and make an issue our of it; I don't think disown was what I was thinking, but some get annoyed and hold on to that for way too long. Those that have done so with me...well, I forgot them altogether because they proved themselves to be idiots.
Well in that case, it is the other way round where you disown them instead! 😅
Better that way, free yourself from the trouble of remembering them in the future!
Exactly!
Yes, on several occasions, I have forgotten birthdays of people very close to me which has also caused me a lot of embarrassment. The funny thing I have done to checkmate that is by setting up reminders with alarms on certain dates, so when my alarm goes off, I go to check whose birthday was happening on that day.
The reminder idea is a good one and if it keeps you on track then it's worth doing. How has it gone for you on those occasions you've forgotten the birthday? Did the person make a big deal of it or were you easily forgiven like I was?
These are mainly relatives, so no big issues. 😀
Hmm this might sound controversial but I don't think birthdays are important at all. Of course, I do appreciate that people celebrate this special day for me. But given these two scenarios: (a) a friend who is there for you almost the entire year but forgot about your birthday vs (b) a friend who only appears during your birthday but missing in action for the most parts of the year.. I would gladly pick the first friend.
So I have no issues if people forgot about my birthday. How they treat me for the rest of the 364 days in the year are important too, if not equally important.
Nope, doesn't sound controversial, if you read my post you'd know I agree.
Hehe yeah! 🙃
Wow.
Hello galenkp!
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